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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29070423">All the Costs are Even</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsujiharu/pseuds/tsujiharu'>tsujiharu</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Shadowhunters (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Pride and Prejudice Fusion, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bad Parent Maryse Lightwood, Bad Parent Robert Lightwood, Enemies to Lovers, Entrepreneur Magnus Bane, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Underage Drinking, It was supposed to be all fluff and crack, Lawyer Alec Lightwood, Light Angst, M/M, Misunderstandings, Modern Day Pride and Prejudice Parody, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Socialite Lightwoods, but here we are, kind of, mentions of drug addiction</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-05-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 09:27:25</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>60,637</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29070423</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/tsujiharu/pseuds/tsujiharu</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“He’s clearly gotten the wrong idea. I should say someth-”<br/>“No,” Alec interrupts his friend hastily, “no, just… just drop it.”<br/>A deep crease forms between Andrew’s brows, “but Alec…”<br/>“It isn’t worth it.” He shakes his head, “he isn’t worth it.”<br/>Because clearly this beautiful, mystical man is determined to hate him. And Alec is fine with that. Two can play that game, and if anything, Magnus has proved himself to be the narrow-minded one of the two by making assumptions of him and his family.</p><p>---</p><p>A modern day Pride and Prejudice AU, in which a disgruntled lawyer and an aloof entrepreneur can't seem to get over their pride (and prejudices?) and admit their very obvious attraction to each other.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alec Lightwood &amp; Andrew Underhill, Alec Lightwood &amp; Isabelle Lightwood, Alec Lightwood &amp; Jace Wayland, Alec Lightwood &amp; Maia Roberts, Clary Fray/Jace Wayland, Lorenzo Rey/Andrew Underhill, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Mentions of Past Magnus Bane/Camille Belcourt</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>227</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>339</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. The Lightwoods</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi everyone!<br/>I've been sitting on this idea for a while and finally got around to writing it. I've got about a third already finished and all the chapters outlined, so I plan on posting one chapter a week moving forward! (Two today because Magnus doesn't make an appearance until Ch. 2, and I couldn't leave it without introducing Mags...! haha)</p><p>This is a Pride and Prejudice parody that loosely follows the plot of the 2005 movie. I meant it to lean a bit toward fluff and crack, but turned out slightly angsty as a lot of my writing tends to do... but it's P&amp;P and Malec, so we're headed to a very fluffy happy ending; in the meantime, I hope you enjoy the fic!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The tick-tock of the clock seems to echo louder than usual, asserting itself over the monotone voices that fill the room. Alec checks the time for the fifth time in just as many minutes. The meeting he sits in (which some smartass decided to schedule for the last thing on Friday) seems to crawl on; it’s already been well over two hours, and they don’t seem to be making any notable progress.</p><p>“Alec, are we boring you?”</p><p>A sharp voice cuts through the endless droning, and Alec is straightening his back with a start.</p><p>“No, mother, I was just…” he tries to make an excuse for himself, but his traitorous mind comes up blank, “checking the time...” His voice trails off, he knows that he has no excuse that will satisfy his mother.</p><p>Maryse Lightwood looks at him silently with a disapproving arch of an eyebrow. She’s known to be a hardass - and Alec understands why. She had to make her own way in this cutthroat world when Robert left the firm after a scandalous affair with his secretary. Since then, Robert has been on an indefinite hiatus from the family law firm, and Maryse has been running Lightwood &amp; Associates on her own. The firm mainly deals with white collar crimes, defending wealthy assholes and helping them get away with embezzlement, corruption, and other questionable practices. </p><p>Needless to say, Alec has never been big on the family business.</p><p>But as the eldest son of the Lightwood family, a name well-known in the Tri-State Area (although Alec is certain their family has been anything but “reputable” for several generations at this point), he grew up knowing that his path was set. He went to the best private schools, graduated from Harvard Law, and entered the family firm, no questions asked. The biggest roadblock in Robert and Maryse’s plan was probably when Alec came out to his family as gay during his final year of law school. It was unexpected for his parents, notoriously known for some of their more “conservative” (read: bigoted) views and workplace policies, and Alec would be lying if he says he didn’t hope that it may change his parent’s minds about grooming him to take over the family firm. Still, while it took a few months for them to wrap their minds around the fact (and even longer to fully accept it), they finally got to a point where Alec’s sexual orientation was no longer considered a <em> taboo topic</em>. Alec had long left the house he grew up in and was barely on speaking terms with his parents by then, but he and Maryse eventually made amends, with the mother now (much to Alec’s dismay) occasionally trying to set her eldest son up with other single gay men in her socialite circles. He and his mother have been slowly mending their relationship since, and Maryse is now back on track with training Alec to take over for the role his father had abandoned.</p><p>His adopted brother Jace took a different path - working at the firm but as head of security. Jace left the Lightwood house when Alec did, standing in solidarity with his brother. They now live together in a condo in Manhattan, Jace living up the bachelor lifestyle away from the scrutinizing eyes of their parents. Their younger sister Izzy, while adamant that she wanted to leave with her elder siblings, was too young to go with Alec and Jace. She is still in school, finishing up her first year studying molecular biology at Columbia University. Max, the youngest of the siblings is still in high school and has shown a lot of potential; Alec wonders if he may also come to work at the firm. At times, Alec can’t help the pang of envy he feels toward his siblings; none of them ever feeling the oppressive pressure to take over the family business, to live up to the family name. Still, usually he’s relieved that they were spared that crippling feeling. He’s glad that they can live their lives in ways that make them happy, rather than ways that they feel is expected of them.</p><p>“We’ve clearly lost my son, so why don’t we follow up on some of the action items and touch base again tomorrow.”</p><p>Alec is startled out of his daze once more by the clear disappointment in his mother’s voice. He winces at the direct call-out, but knows that everyone in the room is secretly glad to be out of this never-ending meeting. As their colleagues walk out the room, Maryse pins Alec in place with a disapproving scowl.</p><p>“Alexander Gideon Lightwood,” her tone is clipped and cold, and Alec can’t stifle the exhausted sigh that escapes him. His mother raises an eyebrow, “do you have something better to be doing?”</p><p><em> Literally anything else, </em> he thinks, as his mouth replies, “no, Mother.” How he manages not to roll his eyes at his mother is a mystery.</p><p>“I need you to pay attention. I want you to take the lead on the Baybrook case coming up, and the research for this case should be useful for Baybrook,” his mother powers on, unknowing of (or maybe just disinterested in) Alec’s frustration. He nods quietly, to which Maryse narrows her eyes, lips pursed.</p><p>“Very well. I will see you Sunday night for dinner, Alec.”</p><p>She turns on her heels and walks out of the conference room. Alec stands in the heavy silence, feeling hollowed by the thought of leading the upcoming Baybrook case - a client being sued for disability discrimination in the workplace. He thinks of all the work he put in to get to where he is now; while he doesn’t hold any illusion that the status he’s achieved so quickly isn’t solely due to his family, he still worked hard in law school. He enjoys studying the law, even now, just not what he applies it to. What he applies his knowledge to makes him want to cave into himself, to pull his hair out, to scream in frustration, to fall to his knees and beg for forgiveness.</p><p>But he’s a Lightwood. His mother needs him - the only Lightwood who studied to take over the family practice.</p><p>So Alec silently packs up his briefcase in a room quickly being engulfed by darkness, the sun setting low behind the tall buildings of Manhattan. The ticking of the clock in the wall gratingly denoting the passing of time; a slow but sure indicator of Alec’s life passing him by. His shoulders slump low along with a deep exhale. He flicks off the light and readies to head home.</p><p>*****************</p><p>“Alec, you’re home!”</p><p>Izzy bounces up from the sofa, the thick textbook that was nestled on her lap is haphazardly dropped to the floor, and her ruby red lips stretched into a wide smile. She walks up to Alec and wraps him in a quick hug.</p><p>She has a spare key to Alec and Jace’s condo and makes herself at home when she feels unsettled in the large house that’s lost most of its occupants - which happens to be often. She has a brilliant mind and head-turning looks. She’s also stubborn as hell, causing her to butt heads with their mother regularly. Alec worries slightly that their mother’s overbearing nature has the opposite effect on Izzy. He’s noticed she’s starting to show more interest in the socialite party scene. Originally introduced to the circles by their mother, she’s latched more onto the crowd that Alec tends to avoid.</p><p>“Hey Izzy,” Alec greets his sister with warmth. No matter how exhausted or weighed down he may feel, his siblings will always be a source of joy and comfort. Izzy, however, hears his voice and her brows knit together. When she speaks again, her voice is laced with concern.</p><p>“You look tired, hermano,” she looks up at him with worried eyes, and Alec responds with a soft smile. He knows it’s weary, but it’s sincere and Izzy seems to see that.</p><p>She takes a step back and walks over to their kitchen.</p><p>“I made dinner,” she starts, and Alec can’t help the grimace that surfaces on his face (he’s grateful his sister was looking away), “well, actually, I burned dinner. So I ordered a pizza.”</p><p>She flips her raven black hair, sheening under the fluorescent lights, and looks back at Alec with a grin.</p><p>“Ah, pizza’s fine.” The relief is evident in his voice, and his sister laughs airily while muttering under her breath (something along the lines of “don’t sound too happy about it”).</p><p>“Is Jace coming home soon?”</p><p>“Should be back within the hour.”</p><p>“Hm,” she seems disinterested in the answer to the question she asked, and Alec notes for the first time today that she seems nervous. Her shoulders are tense and she’s been playing with her hair a little more than usual. She’s busying herself in the kitchen, pulling out plates and napkins, cheese and pepper flakes, but there’s an anxious energy underlying her movements.</p><p>“Is everything okay?” He ventures carefully. Izzy pauses and glances over at Alec; the action almost looks casual, if Alec didn’t know his sister so well, he may think he misinterpreted the situation completely. But he knows that something’s up as soon as Izzy apprehensively curls her lips in between her teeth, the red disappearing into a thin line.</p><p>“Mom walked in on me making out with Meliorn,” she says matter-of-factly, but her voice sounds tight and higher than her usual melodic tone.</p><p>“Oh,” is all Alec can think of saying. He thinks he may be out of his depths in this one, that Jace may be the better to offer any advice on romantic relationships, but he stammers out a response, “and she, uh… didn’t approve, I gather?”</p><p>Since the scandal with Robert, Maryse has been obsessed with “reviving” what’s left of the Lightwood name. She began monitoring who her children were associated with, looking for connections in every relationship they held. Alec knows she means well - that she thinks she’s doing it to ensure a comfortable future for their family, but Jace and Izzy haven’t been as forgiving with Maryse gatekeeping every social commitment they make.</p><p>Izzy pushes the plates toward Alec, obviously frustrated. While Alec is wary of anyone dating his sister, Meliorn wasn’t a horrible guy from what he could tell; he studies Psychology at Columbia where he met Izzy, and she seems to like him well enough. But a few weeks after they started dating, Izzy had told him in confidence that Meliorn is the son of Lebanese immigrants, attending Columbia on a scholarship, and they both knew that Maryse would never approve of their budding relationship.</p><p>Izzy dramatically rolls her eyes, “what do <em> you </em> think, Alec? As soon as she saw us she was in hysterics. She kicked him out and started yelling at me,” she bites out, words seething with agitation, “and now Meliorn won’t even answer my texts.”</p><p>“How did she even know who he was?” Alec asks, curious.</p><p>“Apparently Jia saw us getting coffee together and told Mom. She figured out who I was with and had him looked up,” Izzy says, dejected. Her voice is a lot less angry, but now rings empty and sad. Her eyes are shiny with tears that she desperately holds back and her shoulders are hunched, trembling slightly with every shaky exhale.</p><p>Alec circles the kitchen island and pulls her in for a hug. He squeezes her tight, and Izzy melts into the hold. She doesn’t hold her tears back anymore, and Alec can feel her sobbing against his shoulder.</p><p>They stand like that for a while, Alec gently rubbing Izzy’s back as she releases the emotions she let fester within her. Alec thinks with detached clarity that he’ll have to drop his suit off at the drycleaners tomorrow; Izzy’s makeup has no doubt made its way onto his shirt and suit jacket. Around the same moment, his sister pushes herself away from his grip.</p><p>“Thank you,” she mumbles. Nose bright red and eyes puffy. Alec ruffles her hair, and she glares up at him unconvincingly.</p><p>“Go wash your face, Izzy. Let’s eat dinner.” He sends his sister a small smile, which she returns. Almost as soon as Izzy steps out of the kitchen, Alec hears the front door swing open.</p><p>“Do I smell pizza?” Jace flashes a crooked grin as he saunters into the kitchen, tiredly carding his fingers through his hair.</p><p>“Izzy got us dinner - she’s in the bathroom now,” he falters, unsure of what exactly to tell Jace, but his brother just hums distractedly.</p><p>“Dude,” he starts, “do you remember Kaelie?”</p><p>Alec squints and digs through his memories - while the name sounds familiar, he comes up short and shrugs as he slides a slice of pepperoni onto a plate and hands it over to Jace.</p><p>“The girl I hooked up with a few times? Three months ago, maybe?” His brother takes the plate with a quick thanks.</p><p>“Jace, that doesn’t really narrow it down,” Alec huffs indignantly, but Jace only laughs at that response.</p><p>“Well she kind of ambushed me at work today. She was yelling at me the whole time so I only got bits and pieces of it, but I think I may have slept with another friend of hers?” He at least has the decency to grimace at that, cocking his head to the side as he recalls the events of the day.</p><p>“You reap what you sow, Jace,” Izzy chides as she reenters the room. Her eyes are still slightly red, but she’s freshened up and looking a little more like herself.</p><p>“Fair, fair, but how do I know which chick knows who?” There’s challenge in Jace’s voice but it’s teasing, and Izzy laughs in lieu of a response. Alec finally relaxes a bit, leaning back against the counter with his slice of pizza. </p><p>“One of these days,” she smirks as she gets herself a slice, “a girl’s going to catch you by surprise and you won’t even know what got you.”</p><p>Jace scoffs, “I’ll believe it when I see it, Iz.”</p><p>Alec glances at the clock on the wall - the second hand ticks away, but he can’t hear it over the bright laughter of Jace and Izzy. He sees his siblings banter back and forth about Jace’s escapades and huffs a laugh. His family can be a complicated mess, but he would never trade them for the world.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Pandemonium</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“Is that the owner?” Izzy’s whisper yanks Alec out of his daze.<br/>“Magnus Bane,” Andrew says with a nod.<br/>Magnus Bane.<br/>Even the name suits the man.</p><p>***</p><p>Alec meets Magnus</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>An awkward silence falls over the dinner table.</p><p>They have family dinners every Sunday where they all get together (sans Robert), and the palpable tension is nothing new. Just the click clack of silverware punctuating everything left unsaid. Alec wonders often (weekly) why they even bother with these dinners.</p><p>“Did you hear about the party happening next Friday?” Maryse asks out of the blue, pulling Alec out of thought. Surprisingly, Izzy is the one who lights up at the question.</p><p>“The one at Pandemonium? Yeah, I’m planning on going,” she pipes up excitedly. A sense of unease spreads within Alec when he hears Izzy’s enthusiasm. He knows Izzy deserves the freedom to make her own decisions, but the thought of her, underage, attending a party at a club only proves to make Alec uncomfortable.</p><p>“Jonathan and Clary Morgenstern should be there,” Maryse continues. Izzy perks up when she hears the names.</p><p>“Who?” Jace asks, disinterested. He’s almost as detached from the social scene as Alec (his interest seems to begin and end with the women), but even Alec knows who the Morgensterns are. He shoots his brother a look of disbelief and Jace shrugs. Thankfully, Izzy seems to have enough enthusiasm for all of them to satisfy their mother.</p><p> “I didn’t realize they were in New York!”</p><p>Clary and Jonathan Morgenstern are the heirs of the internationally renowned fashion conglomerate established by their parents. They found success later in life and are still relative newcomers to the scene. As far as Alec knows, they are based in Los Angeles so none of his family have actually met any of them.</p><p>Maryse nods, “apparently Clary Morgenstern is thinking of transferring to Parsons. She’s touring the school and her and her brother are staying in New York over the summer.”</p><p>His siblings listen attentively, but Alec finds his eyes glaze over a tiny bit. He’s never been particularly interested in the socialite scene, only making appearances to appease his family.</p><p>“They’re new money, of course… Valentine Morgenstern came out of nowhere and I wouldn’t trust him as far as I could throw him,” his mother’s face scrunches up like she tasted something bitter, and Alec suddenly loses his appetite. “But they’re a popular family and they have a lot of great connections. I’m glad you’re going to this party, Isabelle. Alec, Jace, are either of you going as well?” She forms it as a question, but Alec can hear the suggestion in her voice.</p><p>“No,”</p><p>“Yeah, sounds like a good time,”</p><p>Alec and Jace answer at the same time and glance at each other.</p><p>“Jace, you don’t even know who these people are,” Alec sighs, but Jace just chuckles in reply.</p><p>“Dude, it’s a party.”</p><p>“Oh come on, Alec! It’ll be fun!” Once Izzy chimes in with a glimmer of hope in her eyes, Alec knows it’s a lost cause. He reminds himself that he can also keep a closer eye on Izzy this way, and Alec resigns to his fate.</p><p>“Can I go, too?” Max perks up, and is met by an immediate “No” from his entire family. The teenager grins goodnaturedly and turns back to his food, “eh, it was worth a try.”</p><p>Jace snorts a laugh and ruffles Max’s hair; smiles breaking out on the faces of the rest of the family as well. Nothing’s changed, and yet the room feels a little warmer now - brighter. The youngest Lightwood was always skilled at piping in at the right moment, bringing a casual levity to a situation. Alec shakes his head as he refocuses on his food.</p><p>The clinking of silverware echoes in the room again, but this time the silence feels a little less lonely.</p><p>***************</p><p>Pandemonium is… loud. Alec doesn’t know what he expected, it’s hardly his first time in a club, but as the beat of the music thumps through his body, his eyes slip closed, and he bows his head slightly; his nerves seeping through his steely exterior. The air is thick with the scent of alcohol and people. It’s a mix he isn’t accustomed to, and have never been all that comfortable with. He feels out of place, like he’s in disguise in his navy button up shirt (which Izzy convinced him to unbutton way lower than he normally would) and dark grey skinny jeans. He’s wearing his comfortable well-worn combat boots, but everything else is new - pushed upon him by his sister determined not to be embarrassed by a brother, who cares little about appearances. </p><p>“You feeling alright, Alec?” Jace claps him on his shoulder, peeking up at him with his mismatched eyes. He’s dressed casually, a tight, military green henley that shows off his toned muscles with dark wash jeans. He has a whiskey and a gin and tonic clutched carefully in his other hand, and he hands him the gin and tonic once he sees Alec nod. Izzy is close behind him holding a drink that looks suspiciously alcoholic. Alec glares at the offending drink and she rolls her eyes, making her annoyance clear. She’s dressed to the nines in an azure blue, one-shoulder bodycon minidress, arms and fingers adorned with golden jewelry, a snake motif bracelet wraps around and up her wrist. Even with the blaring music and the rhythmic beat that he feels in his bones, Alec thinks he can hear the graceful clicks of her black Jimmy Choo heels just by looking at them. She’s always the most comfortable at these parties.</p><p>“It’s just one drink,” she fusses.</p><p>Alec sighs - he remembers what it was like to be 19 - “one drink,” he repeats sternly. He’ll just have to keep a close eye on her. </p><p>As Alec’s eyes start to wander across the crowded dance floor, he sees a familiar figure walk up to them.</p><p>“Andrew,” Alec greets his friend with a relieved smile and a hug. Jace follows suit with a handshake and chest-bump and Izzy waves at him from behind her brothers. Andrew Underhill is one of Alec’s closest friends outside of his siblings; the two met during their freshman year in college, and have remained good friends since. Andrew, who was already out of the closet in undergrad, was the first person Alec came out to. Andrew sees Izzy, distractedly sipping on her drink behind Jace while scrolling through her phone, and points a knowing look toward Alec. Alec shrugs it off, and the corners of Andrew’s eyes crinkle in a smile.</p><p>“Have you all seen the guests of honor?” Izzy perks up at Andrew’s question.</p><p>“Are the Morgensterns here already?”</p><p>“They’re up in the VIP section - they’re close friends with the owner of the club who’s hosting the whole thing,” his eyes travel to the stairs in the back corner of the club, cordoned off by a rich maroon velvet rope.</p><p>Izzy follows his gaze, her interest clearly piqued, “the owner?”</p><p>Andrew looks surprised at the younger Lightwood’s question - his eyebrows are raised slightly as he continues, “he owns a number of event venues in the city. I hear he basically has Brooklyn in his pocket, but he splits his time between New York and Boston.”</p><p>“Oh yeah?” Alec sips on his gin and tonic, wincing a little at the generous amount of liquor in it. He figures Jace must have turned on the charm for these.</p><p>Andrew nods, “he’s what your mom would call ‘New Money’,” Alec winces at the comment, “but he’s got a lot of it, and he doesn’t seem to have a problem spending it.”</p><p>The energy changes in a moment; an excited hush spreads across the crowd and people start whispering. Alec looks around him to see what changed, and he notices that everyone’s attention seems to be taken by the staircase leading to the VIP section. Now that the voices of the people around him have died down to a murmur, the music feels even louder. The bassline reverberates through his body like a heartbeat. He turns back to Andrew, Jace, and Izzy, mouth open and ready to ask what’s going on, but stops at the look on Jace’s face. Jace is staring at the stairs, wide-eyed and slack jawed. He looks… in awe. Alec isn’t sure if he’s ever seen this exact look on his brother’s face. He cranes his neck back around, eyebrows knit together, to see what he’s looking at.</p><p>At the top of the stairway, he sees three figures who seem completely unaware of the impact they’ve had on the room. The first man looks, for a lack of better words, unpleasant. His hollow cheeks are pulled into a tight frown, and his deep set eyes don’t have any light in them. He keeps shifting his weight, looking uncomfortable and frustrated. Alec thinks he must be Jonathan Morgenstern, as the second person, he guesses, is his sister Clary. The two have matching fiery red hair, but the similarity ends there. Clary is vibrant. She smiles wide and innocently, laughing at whatever was said a moment ago, seemingly without a care in the world. Her eyes shine with mirth as she playfully lays a hand on the third figure on the stairs. Alec’s eyes travel to the final man, and suddenly the air in the room feels infinitely thinner.</p><p>The man is striking. He wears skintight leather pants that leave little to the imagination with a silky wine red button up covered in delicate embroidered flowers, the shirt is unbuttoned dangerously low. Alec can almost make out his navel when the man shifts and leans in toward Clary. Long, golden chains dangle from his neck and settle against his smooth, toned torso. His manicured fingers, which are clasped over Clary’s delicate hand on his arm are decorated with multiple rings, and Alec can’t stop his eyes from continuing to trail up further. The man’s smile is almost enough to make Alec’s brain short-circuit. It looks like he has a thin layer of a neutral lip gloss, and his cheekbones that rise with the corners of his mouth shimmer subtly. His rich, dark eyes are flawlessly framed by glittery gold eyeshadow and a bold cat eye. His jet black hair is perfectly coiffed up, meticulous, and yet effortless at the same time. He accentuates his hair with splashes of red at the tips, which match his outfit. The man oozes confidence and charisma, and Alec somehow feels even more out of place than he originally did.</p><p>“Is that the owner?” Izzy’s whisper yanks Alec out of his daze.</p><p>“Magnus Bane,” Andrew says with a nod.</p><p><em> Magnus Bane</em>.</p><p>Even the name suits the man.</p><p>“Forget about the guy,” Jace sounds breathless, his eyes haven’t moved away from the redhead on the stairs, “is that the Morgenstern girl?”</p><p>Andrew chuckles and nods again, “Clary Morgenstern. You want to meet her?”</p><p>Jace’s eyes dart back to Andrew, “you know her?”</p><p>“We’ve already met. My dad knows her mom. Jonathan’s a bit of a dick, but Clary’s great.”</p><p>“Never would’ve guessed,” Alec mutters beneath his breath; Andrew looks at him with an amused grin, but Jace seems preoccupied with his thoughts on the newcomer. It’s a new look on his brother, and Alec isn’t sure how he feels about this sudden development. He doesn’t have a chance to ponder on it, however, since Izzy grabs his arm.</p><p>“Let’s go!” Her red lips break into a smile, and she practically drags the three men toward the stairs.</p><p>Alec can barely look up as they near the three figures making their way to the dance floor. He can’t bring himself to look at Magnus after shamelessly ogling him just a minute earlier, but he knows they’ve made it to the group when a bubbly voice cuts through the surrounding chatter.</p><p>“Andrew!” Clary reaches out toward Alec’s friend, and wraps him in a hug, “it’s so great to see you!” Her green eyes sparkle as she smiles; they’re warm and genuine. Alec tries to focus on the friendly interaction, but he can feel the weight of someone’s eyes on him, coming from right beside the redhead.</p><p>“...and who are <em> you</em>?” A warm, velvety voice travels to Alec’s ears, and he feels an unwelcome flush rise in him. Alec tries not to, he clenches his teeth and stands stock still, but like a moth drawn to a flame, his eyes seek out the alluring man, and he’s greeted by a playful (flirty?) smirk. He can feel the blush that burns in his cheeks, making him even more self conscious - his stance is tense, mouth stretched in a thin line.</p><p>Andrew laughs as he takes a step back from Clary and gestures towards the three, “these are my friends, Alec, Jace, and Izzy Lightwood.”</p><p>At that, Magnus narrows his eyes.</p><p>“Lightwood - of Lightwood &amp; Associates?” His deep voice sounds taut, void of the playfulness that graced it just seconds ago.</p><p>“That’s the one,” Izzy nods with a smile, seemingly unaware of the change in the man’s tone. Magnus nods, but he seems withdrawn now, distant. The quick change in mood doesn’t sit well with Alec, whose elation sours right along with him. He shares a quick look with Andrew, who is just as confused.</p><p>Jace, however, seems to be completely zoned in on Clary. He walks straight up to her, full of his usual confidence and swagger, his heterochromatic eyes narrowed in a mischievous grin.</p><p>“I’m Jace,” he’s clearly speaking just to her, ignoring the two men who flank the girl. He extends his hand and Clary takes it with a giggle.</p><p>“Clary.”</p><p>A quiet hiss escapes the mouth of the bony man standing next to her, and Clary jumps back, startled.</p><p>“Oh, and this is my brother, Jonathan,” Clary introduces him dutifully, but Jonathan only tucks his chin in a small nod at the acknowledgement. At this distance, Alec can see that his eyes are also green, but they lack the happy shine that Clary’s radiates. His thin nose is scrunched up at the bridge, and Alec gets the feeling that Jonathan Morgenstern does not approve of Jace.</p><p>“You wanna dance?” Jace tips his head toward the dance floor, and Alec has to will himself not to roll his eyes. Perhaps he imagined the earlier glint in his brother’s eye, because these moves are classic Jace. Clary glances around at her friends, looking uncertain, but when Magnus smiles and nods (Alec attempts to convince himself that it isn’t the soft warmth of those eyes that send shivers up his spine), she turns back to the blonde with a beaming smile.</p><p>“Careful, Clary,” Izzy chimes in, her sly smile translates clearly in her teasing voice, “my brother can be quite the smooth talker.”</p><p>“Oh fuck off, Izzy.” Jace’s retort is clipped and bordering on frantic, but Clary seems to take it in stride. Her bubbly laugh cuts over the music.</p><p>“Is he, now?” She points an assessing look on Jace, but quickly turns and winks at Izzy. “Then maybe you should join us and help me keep an eye on him.”</p><p>The remaining men watch the three saunter off to the dance floor; as soon as they leave, the air goes stale. Jonathan doesn’t even pretend to want to stick around. He immediately groans and turns on his heel, heading straight back up the stairs where they just came down from. Magnus chuckles, but the warmth in his voice is gone. His face is smiling, but Alec, having just seen the way he looked at Clary, can tell it’s put on.</p><p>“Excuse my friend’s brother,” he apologizes, but it’s directed at Andrew. Magnus’ body is deliberately angled away from Alec, and as hard as he tries not to care, he can’t help but bristle at the slight. Alec doesn’t know what he’s done to deserve this cold reception from a man he’s only just met. <em> It doesn’t matter</em>, he tells himself, <em> don’t make a scene</em>. He can’t embarrass himself here - he’s a Lightwood and he has a reputation to uphold. So Alec holds his chin up high, standing tense at parade rest as Andrew and Magnus carry on polite small talk.</p><p> </p><p>The night wears on - Alec and his friend have long parted ways with the mysterious Magnus Bane, and they’ve been nursing drinks as they catch up in a quiet corner of the club. Throughout the evening Alec has been keeping an eye out for his siblings; Jace, he’s noticed, is smitten with the Morgenstern girl. He’s been following her around like a puppy with a smile usually reserved for family, far less cynical than the cocky smirk that most girls get from him. Izzy seems to be enjoying herself, too, bouncing from one dance partner to another. From what Alec can tell, she’s been keeping her word of sticking to one drink. When he looks over again, he sees both Izzy and Jace at the bar, laughing at something they see on the dance floor. He’s about to turn to Andrew to make a comment about Jace finally detaching himself from Clary, when he hears a familiar voice from behind the wall they are leaning on.</p><p>“Why are you being so rude?” Clary’s accusatory voice rings above the music.</p><p>“I’ve had enough dealings with the Lightwoods to know that they’re hateful bigots,” Magnus sounds frustrated, his words full of venom, and Alec feels a chill travel down his spine. He immediately realizes that he shouldn’t be hearing this. This is personal, and he should leave. But his feet seem glued to the ground and he is unable to move. Andrew clearly hears it too. He shoots a worried glance to his friend and lifts a hand to Alec’s shoulder. They can just make out the three through the windows in the wall. Much to Alec’s relief, the others aren’t paying any attention to their direction, focused on their conversation.</p><p>“Maybe their parents are, Magnus,” Clary pouts defensively, “but Jace doesn’t seem like that at all. He’s really charming and kind and -”</p><p>Her brother scoffs at Clary’s words, and Magnus’ eyes slant down. His voice is softer when he speaks next, “men like Jace are full of charm and charisma. You watch out, Biscuit. I don’t want to see you getting hurt.” He lays a gentle hand on the frowning redhead’s cheek.</p><p>“Alec, too, though! Jace speaks so highly of him. I don’t think he would if Alec were some sort of prejudiced asshole.”</p><p>The girl’s defense is unexpected, and Alec’s filled with gratitude for her. But neither of the men seem to be in the mood to listen.</p><p>“Clary,” starts Magnus, the venom returns to his voice as he speaks, “Alexander Lightwood is his mother’s pet project. No doubt she’s instilled all her hateful views into him as well. I mean, didn’t you see him earlier? He couldn’t even bear to look at me! I’m probably way too much of a flamboyant, freewheeling bisexual for him to stomach.”</p><p>Alec flushes bright red at those words. That’s what Magnus thought that was? He can’t decide whether to be embarrassed or angry that his awkward attraction was perceived as prejudice. He thinks Clary’s speaking again, but he can no longer hear them over the sound of his heartbeat. The grip on his shoulder tightens, and Andrew whispers,</p><p>“He’s clearly gotten the wrong idea. I should say someth-”</p><p>“No,” Alec interrupts his friend hastily, “no, just… just drop it.”</p><p>A deep crease forms between Andrew’s brows, “but Alec…”</p><p>“It isn’t worth it.” He shakes his head, “he isn’t worth it.”</p><p>Because clearly this beautiful, mystical man is determined to hate him. And Alec is fine with that. Two can play that game, and if anything, Magnus has proved himself to be the narrow-minded one of the two by making assumptions of him and his family.</p><p>“I, uh,” Alec releases himself from Andrew’s hold, bringing his arm up to rub the back of his neck uncomfortably, “I need to use the restroom.” </p><p>Andrew opens his mouth, but no words come out. He silently nods his head instead, sending a worried glance to his friend. But Alec can’t care about that right now. He’s flustered - torn between frustration, agitation, and mortification. His mind is a jumble and he needs to get out. He pushes past the crowd, careful to escape without being spotted by Magnus, Clary, or Jonathan. He doesn’t stop until he’s outside the club in a dark alleyway alone. His breath comes in heaves and he can hear his heartbeat thumping loudly in his ears. Or perhaps it’s the beat of the music that continues to send rhythmic shivers through his body even out here. The noises mesh together as he leans against the wall, and he slowly sinks down to the ground listening to the steady beats that course through his body.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you enjoyed the first two chapters! If you did and feel so inclined, kudos and comments make my day :)<br/>I'll be back in a week, but in the meantime, I have a few other fics on AO3. You can also find me on Twitter (@tsujiharud) or Instagram (@tsuji.haru.d) where I lurk and nerd out about my favorite fandoms!</p><p>Thanks again for reading.</p><p>tsujiharu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. What They Say about Assumptions</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Alec sits on his balcony and sees the sun begin to rise behind the Manhattan skyline. It’s his favorite part of the day, witnessing a new dawn overtake the city.<br/>He’s pulled out of his reverie by the front door opening and turns around to see his brother wander into the living room, still dressed in the same outfit as the night before. Alec’s face drops into a scowl.<br/>“I can’t decide if you’re back late or early,” he sasses, “you usually come home right after you’re done or stay for breakfast.”</p><p>***</p><p>Jace and Alec rehash the events of the night before. Alec finds himself having to spend more time with Magnus.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you so much for all the kudos and comments on the first two chapters! I'm glad to hear people are enjoying the story so far!<br/>This chapter was a fun one for me to write, so I hope you all enjoy it as well :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A peaceful quiet befalls the condo. Alec woke early after a restless sleep; he barely got 3 hours of rest after sending Izzy home in an Uber and getting home himself close to 3am. The only sound he hears is his own calm breathing and the <em> drip, drip, drip </em> of the coffee maker. He sits on his balcony and sees the sun begin to rise behind the Manhattan skyline. It’s his favorite part of the day, witnessing a new dawn overtake the city.</p><p>He’s pulled out of his reverie by the front door opening and turns around to see his brother wander into the living room, still dressed in the same outfit as the night before. Alec’s face drops into a scowl.</p><p>“I can’t decide if you’re back late or early,” he sasses, “you usually come home right after you’re done or stay for breakfast.”</p><p>Jace laughs, but it’s unexpectedly soft and airy, “nah, man. I didn’t go home with Clary.”</p><p>The response is surprising; Alec left his brother at the club last night, after he indicated he wanted to spend more time with the redhead.</p><p>“So… someone else?” He asks, head tilted and eyebrows raised.</p><p>“What? No!” Jace sounds offended at that, “no, we just talked. We walked around the city a bit and talked.”</p><p>And that’s enough to render Alec speechless.</p><p>“...are you making coffee? Is there enough for me?” The blonde has already moved on toward the kitchen, unbothered by his stunned brother.</p><p>“Uh, yeah,” stammers Alec, “wait, what?” He follows Jace into the kitchen.</p><p>“What?” Jace rolls his eyes.</p><p>“You… walked. And talked. All night. With Clary.”</p><p>“Yup,” he pops his <em> p </em> as if to make a point, and begins pouring himself a cup of coffee.</p><p>“You did that. You, Jace Lightwood,” Alec can’t help the incredulity that leaks into his voice. Jace gives an exaggerated nod.</p><p>“Yes, Alec, me. I don’t know, man, she’s just… Clary’s different,” he looks off to the side, choosing his words carefully. He brings his coffee mug up to his mouth and takes a sip. Alec can’t help but look at him with wide eyes. He knows he’s being rude, but he’s never seen his brother act this way before.</p><p>“Oh,” is what escapes his mouth. Jace nods again and Alec mirrors the action, “well, that’s awesome, Jace. And if she put up with your sorry ass all night, then she probably likes you too. Not sure why, but…”</p><p>Jace smacks Alec playfully, but is distracted when his phone buzzes on the counter. He looks at the notification, and Alec sees a soft smile spread across his face as he starts typing a reply to the text he received.</p><p>Alec’s eyebrows shoot up, “are you and Clary <em> texting</em>?”</p><p>Jace only glares at him in response and changes the subject, pocketing his phone as he does so.</p><p>“What did you get up to last night? I lost track of you near the end there.” Alec feels his stomach churn uncomfortably at the question. He hasn’t told anyone about what he and Andrew overheard Magnus say and considers whether or not it’s worth telling Jace.</p><p>“What do you know about Magnus Bane?” He asks, instead. He pours himself another cup of coffee and sits down at the counter. Jace sends him a confused look that morphs into a crooked grin.</p><p>“Why? You interested?”</p><p>“No!” Alec almost yelps, the denial too quick on his tongue. He feels his face flush hot, and he rubs his palm across his chin, “no, he… he seems to have something against us… Lightwoods.”</p><p>Jace narrows his eyes, “what do you mean?”</p><p>“I think he had a bad experience with Mom and Dad, I’m guessing before I came out to them. Something about them being bigoted,” Alec tries to make it sound casual, but Jace knows him too well.</p><p>“What did he say, Alec?”</p><p>“Just that he assumed I was like our parents,” he shrugged with a faux indifference. His brother’s concern turns into anger.</p><p>“What the fuck, dude. He said that? He barely even spoke to you, that arrogant son of a bi-”</p><p>“It’s fine, Jace,” Alec raises his hand to stop his brother, and sends him a tired smile. “But hey, Clary stood up for us. She seems like a good one.”</p><p>At that, Jace’s anger seems to dissipate, and a goofy smile takes its place. Alec can’t stifle the snort that escapes him at the quick shift.</p><p>“You are way in over your head, aren’t you?” The tension of the previous moment is gone, and the two brothers just start laughing.</p><p>“I dunno, man,” Jace scratches at the back of his head, “I think you might be right.”</p><p>He knows he must be beaming, because Jace honest-to-god <em> blushes </em> when he sees Alec’s face. He waves him off dismissively (but his smile is anything but), “shut up, dude.”</p><p>The joy is what lingers in the crisp, morning air.</p><p><br/>*****************</p><p> </p><p>Alec is happy for his brother - he really is. However, Jace’s budding courtship (the word seems appropriate considering Jace’s complete lack of action to indicate his interest toward Clary, which is very unlike Jace… but Alec supposes that’s the whole point) means spending a lot of time with Clary, and by way of that, with Magnus Bane. In the weeks following their first meeting, Jace often dragged his siblings and, when Alec managed to convince him to join along, Andrew to various social gatherings hosted by either Magnus or the Morgensterns.</p><p>Alec’s plan of action has been simple; avoid Magnus Bane at all costs. If they were at a party, steer clear of the aggravating man. If it was a smaller social gathering with just their friends, Alec remained stoic and taciturn. It may be petty and you could call it pride, as Andrew not-so-helpfully pointed out, but the eldest Lightwood doesn’t care to make amends with someone who so eagerly judged him without reservation. Magnus seems to be either unaware of unbothered by this arrangement, never once making an effort to bridge the gap himself. The man seems to get along fine with his siblings, regularly gossiping with Izzy about the shenanigans of their mutual acquaintances and teasing Jace about his “hyper-masculine facade”, as he calls it. He’s warmed up to Andrew, whose agreeable nature makes it easy to get along with anyone. At times, Alec envies his friend’s innate people skills, but when he feels Magnus’ cold, disinterested eyes on him, Alec can’t say that he minds his inability to make friends with unreasonable people.</p><p>Tonight, they are all in the VIP section of Pandemonium. It’s a relatively tame night for the club - the music beats loudly through the open space and the floor is covered with dancing bodies, but there’s still space for more people to join in. Izzy disappeared somewhere downstairs, after promising Alec that she won’t be drinking tonight, leaving Alec without his main buffer between him and Magnus. Andrew performs the role admirably, all easy smiles and pleasant conversation while Clary and Jace flirt playfully on the sofa across from them. Jonathan sulks by the personal bar a few feet away, glaring at Jace and offering sarcastic quips every now and then. Clary sends him some stern looks, but plays off his comments as cynicism or jokes, occasionally apologizing to the group for her “misunderstood” older brother. Alec isn’t sure if misunderstood is the term he would choose for Jonathan.</p><p>The conversation eventually turns to dancing when Clary spots Izzy on the dance floor.</p><p>“We should all go dance!” She exclaims, head tilting toward the crowded floor. Her green eyes glisten with excitement, “Alec, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you on the floor.”</p><p>She comments with simple curiosity, but it elicits a grimace out of the man, “I -” he flushes, “I don’t dance.”</p><p>“Never seen anyone with less rhythm in my life,” Jace laughs. Alec narrows his eyes at him, but appreciates the assist. The last thing he wants is to be dragged out to the dance floor. He’s going to need a lot more alcohol for that.</p><p>“Oh,” disappointment is laced through her voice, but she immediately perks up again, “Magnus can teach you!”</p><p>Alec’s eyebrows shoot up at the suggestion, and he can hear Magnus clear his throat loudly beside her.</p><p>“Biscuit, I’m not sure if that’s -” he starts, but the bubbly redhead is having none of it.</p><p>“Magnus is a great dancer! I’m sure if you follow his lead, you’ll pick up some moves in no time!”</p><p>“No, I really -” the decline is at the tip of his tongue, but Magnus interrupts him,</p><p>“Clary, I don’t think Alexander would be comfortable dancing with someone <em> like me</em>.”</p><p>
  <em> Like me. </em>
</p><p>The implication is obvious, with the way Magnus spits out the words. And that… that’s just enough to make Alec snap. He’s been a good sport, supporting his brother as he tries to get to know Clary. Spending time with her friends, because it was important to Jace. But Alec’s just about had it with this maddening, judgemental, prejudiced man.</p><p>“I think Magnus would prefer to dance with someone who he doesn’t perceive as a bigoted, raging homophobe.” Alec’s voice is clear, steady, and confident for the first time today, and suddenly a hush falls over the room. “Thankfully I’m done with the internal self-loathing phase of discovering my sexuality, but that’s neither here nor there.”</p><p>The electronic bass beat still shakes the room, but it all sounds so distant now. Alec can see the shock in everyone’s faces, Jace looking mildly amused at his brother’s surprising outburst. But the most satisfying moment by far is the look of mortification on Magnus Bane’s (<em> beautiful </em>) face as he processes Alec’s words. His mouth opens and closes a few times, like he’s trying to put together sounds that won’t come out. Alec can’t help the smugness he feels in response.</p><p>“You all go dance, have fun,” he says, standing up and draining the remainder of his gin and tonic, “if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go get some air.”</p><p>He leaves his still speechless companions and leisurely strolls down the stairs and out the back toward the familiar alleyway.</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>Alec leans against the club wall while counting his breaths, taking in controlled inhales followed by long exhales. <em> One, two, three, four - four, three, two, one </em>… finding the courage to stand up to Magnus felt easy in the moment, but now that Alec’s alone in a dark, dirty alleyway surrounded by the muffled beats of the club music and city noises that make their way from the busy New York streets, he’s exhausted.</p><p><em> One, two, three, four </em> - <em> four, three, two, one </em></p><p>He’s counting over and over again, trying to find calmness when he hears footsteps come from the door he escaped through. The unwelcome guest stops a few feet away.</p><p>“Alexander.”</p><p>It’s not the voice Alec expects to hear. His eyes fly open and his head jerks toward the voice. Magnus Bane is standing outside the heavy set doors leading back to the club. He looks nervous, which is a new look on the usually confident-borderline-cocky man. The look is so wrong for Magnus, Alec thinks. His eyebrows crease instinctively.</p><p>“What do you want, Magnus?”</p><p>Magnus flinches a little at Alec’s clipped tone, “I wanted to apologize. Clearly there’s been a… misunderstanding,” he starts.</p><p>Alec scoffs, “a <em> misunderstanding</em>. Right.”</p><p>“I’ve made some mistaken assumptions, making an ass out of you and me, or, you know what they say,” he nervously continues. He’s rambling in his fluster, which would almost be endearing if it weren’t for this man accusing him of being a homophobe with no basis.</p><p>“An ass out of you, I don’t know about me,” Alec retorts, regaining some of the confidence he felt in the club.</p><p>“Yes,” Magnus looks discouraged, “I suppose you’re right. I’m sorry, Alec. I made some assumptions based on prior experiences with…”</p><p>“My parents?” The man nods when Alec finishes his sentence. Alec pushes away from where he was leaning on the wall, cracking his neck as he stands straight. Magnus’ eyes are trained on his movements, his expression unreadable. Alec tenses under the scrutiny, but forces himself to keep going.</p><p>“Listen, Magnus. I’m gay. And I’ve been out for a couple of years now to friends <em> and </em> family. My parents aren’t perfect, but they try to understand. I’m proud of who I am, how far I’ve come, of what I’ve accomplished, and I’m not going to let some asshole ruin that just because they don’t like my last name. So fuck you and your assumptions.”</p><p>The two men stand in silence for a moment, staring at each other. Alec almost falters against Magnus’ intense stare; his deep, dark orbs shine with a curious glint, and they seem to peer straight into his soul. It makes Alec want to shy away, to fold into himself. But he stands tall, head held high, and doesn’t break eye contact. <em> Two can play that game </em>.</p><p>Magnus is the first to look away.</p><p>A loud honk of a car blares from the streets, echoing through the alley, and Magnus looks like he’s startled out of a trance.</p><p>“I understand,” he says, quiet and thoughtful, “and I <em> am </em> sorry, Alexander. It was wrong of me to assume, and I fear I’ve acted horrifically toward you.”</p><p>Alec shifts his gaze, uncomfortable with the sincere apology that he didn’t expect to hear.</p><p>“How could I ever judge Jonathan for his behavior now?”</p><p>That elicits a huff of laughter from Alec. When he looks back at Magnus, the other man is looking at him with a playful smirk that almost punches the air out of his lungs.</p><p>
  <em> Oh. </em>
</p><p>“Would you let me make amends?” The man sounds hopeful, and Alec suddenly can’t breathe again.</p><p>“What,” he stammers out, “what did you have in mind?”</p><p>Magnus hums (<em> purrs </em>) and brings an impeccably manicured finger to his lips. He taps at them as if to indicate he’s thinking, and Alec can’t take his eyes away from the movement. The measured tapping, the subtle pink of Magnus’ lip gloss, the sheen of the midnight blue manicure, the layered silver rings. Alec only notices he’s staring when the finger stops. His eyes dart up to Magnus’ and he meets narrowed eyes, the slight uptick of his lips hinting at a smile. A furious blush rises to Alec’s cheeks.</p><p>“Come back inside -” Magnus suggests, “dance with me?”</p><p>Now Alec is the one who can’t find the words. His mouth ajar, eyes disbelieving. He isn’t sure if he can do it. Dance with Magnus Bane? It’s too up close and personal. Too familiar. Too intimate.</p><p>And this is a man he <em> hated </em> until just a minute ago (but did he really?).</p><p>He should say no (should he?).</p><p>He’s about to say no (is he?).</p><p>But the words are stuck somewhere in his throat. Magnus waits patiently for an answer; head tilted to the side, an amused spark in his eyes, the glitter on his eyelids (<em>they’re silver today </em> - why does Alec so easily notice these details?) shimmer under the flickering street lamps. Alec can feel his heart beating in his chest.</p><p>“I -”</p><p>“Alec! There you are!”</p><p>Izzy’s voice pulls Alec out of his haze. His hand jolts back from where it was unconsciously reaching out to the other man. Magnus follows the movement with his eyes and sends a pointed look toward Alec.</p><p>“Izzy,” Alec starts to turn toward his sister, but his eyes are still locked on to Magnus’. There’s something… magical about those eyes, and with Magnus seemingly in no hurry to break this staring match they’ve started, Alec lingers in the moment. When he finally does turn to his sister, he sees she’s not alone. A man he doesn’t recognize is standing in the doorway. He’s handsome - Alec doesn’t know much about fashion, but he can tell the man is donning an expensive suit. His beard and mustache are both trimmed neatly, and his hair is just long enough to see dark, tight curls. He sees the man do a quick scope of the alley and Alec notes a flicker of recognition in his eyes when they land on Magnus, but it’s gone as quickly as it appeared. Instead, the man trains his sight on Alec.</p><p>“Oh, right! Alec, Magnus, this is Victor,” she motions back at the man behind her, “some guy wasn’t taking no for an answer, I was about to kick his ass, but Victor stepped in and helped me out.”</p><p>Alec eyes the unknown man suspiciously, one eyebrow raised, but shifts his focus on Izzy instead. She looks and sounds… fine, but he can’t shake the feeling that something isn’t right. She’s flush, glowing with a sheen of sweat that isn’t surprising considering she was in a crowded club until now. He checks her eyes, her pupils are dilated, but with the dark lighting of the alleyway that doesn’t feel all that out of place. There’s a flash of guilt in his gut when he realizes what he’s checking for, but Izzy has been going out more and more over the last year, and the big brother in him can’t help but feel concerned for her. While Alec isn’t a complete prude about recreational drug use, he knows some of the stuff that goes around in these circles can be dangerous.</p><p>“Are you okay?” He asks instead, and his sister laughs.</p><p>“I’m fine, Alec. Thanks to my knight in shining armour.” She winks at Victor, but follows it with a stage whisper to Alec, “not that I needed the help.”</p><p>Victor chuckles, “I just happened to be at the right place at the right time. Although, now that I’ve gotten to know you a bit, I can see that my concern was misplaced.”</p><p>His words curl elegantly around his British accent. There’s a sweetness to the man’s voice that slowly seeps into Alec’s mind like molasses. Alec’s stomach twists in unease, but before he can give the feeling much thought, someone clears his throat beside him.</p><p>“Forgive me Alexander, Izzy. I should get back inside.” The frosty tone isn’t new, but it feels out of place after the charged moment they shared right before his sister arrived. Or had he just imagined it all? The thought brings about a wave of embarrassment, but when Alec shoots a hesitant glance toward Magnus, he sees that the other man isn’t paying him any attention at all. Magnus is staring daggers at Victor with an icy look that Alec’s never seen on the man, not even when Magnus supposedly hated him.</p><p>Magnus must notice him staring, because he brings his gaze back to Alec. When he does so, it’s visibly softened. Alec doesn’t dwell on how the tension releases from his shoulders when he sees that look.</p><p>“I hope we can continue our conversation another day, Alexander,” Magnus adds with a tight smile before nodding curtly and taking his leave without saying a single word to the new arrival.</p><p>“What was that about?” Izzy asks, clearly confused. Alec can only shrug.</p><p>Victor is still staring at the door Magnus disappeared through when he speaks again, “does Magnus Bane come here often?”</p><p>The question is innocent enough; Izzy had failed to introduce either of them, but it isn’t outside the realm of possibility for Victor to know who Magnus was. While the Lightwoods hadn’t heard of him (most likely thanks to Maryse’s disdain for “new money families”), they’ve quickly learned that Magnus is regarded as some sort of behind-the-scenes royalty of Brooklyn nightlife. Still, Alec bristles at the question - perhaps it’s the tone of forced nonchalance in the face of clear contempt from the man in question.</p><p>“He owns the place,” his sister explains before facing Alec again, “hey, are you ready to head home? Jace wants to stay a bit longer, but I’m beat.”</p><p>“I’d be happy to call you a car,” Victor interjects.</p><p>“No, that won’t be necessary,” Alec quips back, a little too harshly, perhaps, based on Izzy’s disapproving look.</p><p>“Alec, no need to be rude,” she rests a hand on her brother’s arm and sends a smile toward Victor, “thank you for the offer, but we’re fine.”</p><p>The man nods, “of course. It was a pleasure meeting you Isabelle, and you as well.” He smiles at Alec. Izzy walks back up to Victor and drops a quick kiss on his cheek.</p><p>“It was wonderful meeting you as well. You have my number, don’t be a stranger.” She winks.</p><p>“As if anyone could resist your charm,” he chuckles in response, “I should get going as well, my friends must be wondering where I’ve gone off to.”</p><p>He gives the two a small nod, and turns on his heels. There’s an inexplicable sense of unease coursing through Alec’s body and he feels drained; perhaps from his confrontation with Magnus or the shared tense moment from before they were interrupted; perhaps it was from his concerns for his sister or the stranger who seems to have charmed his way into his sister’s trust; perhaps it was Magnus’ cold reception to the stranger that raises Alec’s hackles.</p><p>He represses the discomfort and digs around his pocket for his phone, “I’ll call a car, you have everything you need?”</p><p>Izzy nods and starts walking toward the street, shrugging on her jacket as she goes. As the two approach the street, a police siren goes off in the distance. With each measured whir of the siren, Alec feels anxiety bubble slow and steady inside him.</p><p>He begins counting his breaths once more.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Well now that they've cleared up that misunderstanding, we're all set for a happily ever after... right?</p><p>If you want to follow me at either twitter (@tsujiharud) or Instagram (@tsuji.haru.d), I always appreciate interacting with others in the fandoms!</p><p>Kudos and comments are so very appreciated if you're feeling generous :) Hope you all have a good weekend, and I'll be back next week!</p><p>tsujiharu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Changing Tides</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Tap, tap, tap… He lets the sound of his pen against the wood soothe him as he reads through the file he’s been working on all morning. He’s combed through it so many times that the words start to lose all meaning.<br/>“Alec?” There’s a knock on his office door and Maryse pops her head in, “oh good, you’re here. There’s someone I’d like you to meet.”</p><p>***</p><p>Maryse is up to no good, and Alec hears more about Magnus' past.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Lunar New Year, everyone!!<br/>As usual I want to thank everyone for reading/leaving kudos/commenting on the chapters so far. I’m glad to know that you are enjoying the story, and I truly appreciate all of it!!<br/>I also love seeing everyone associate the characters to their P&amp;P counterpart. The process of coming up with the character matches was a lot of fun for me! We get to see another introduced in this chapter :)</p><p>Before we begin… I don’t know much about how law practices work, and that’s probably very evident in my depiction of Alec’s workplace. I’m sorry and please don’t @ me. Haha</p><p>With all that said, I hope you all enjoy the chapter!!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec knocks his pen against his desk - once, twice, three times - deep in thought. He’s drafting a deal so that his crook of a client can avoid litigation, and he swears he can feel his soul crumble with every second that passes. He imagines his days passing like this for the rest of his life, arguing day to day for people who don’t deserve it.</p><p><em> Tap, tap, tap… </em>He lets the sound of his pen against the wood soothe him as he reads through the file he’s been working on all morning. He’s combed through it so many times that the words start to lose all meaning.</p><p>“Alec?” There’s a knock on his office door and Maryse pops her head in, “oh good, you’re here. There’s someone I’d like you to meet.”</p><p>Alec pushes himself up from his chair, thankful for an excuse to take a break from his case. The stretch feels painfully good on his joints, stiff after sitting in front of his computer for so long.</p><p>Maryse leads him out to her office at the end of the hall; a decadent corner office with floor-to-ceiling windows all along the wall. She has a magnificent oak desk across from the entryway, and a man sits there with his back to the door. Alec sees dark hair bundled up into a ponytail, every strand neatly tempered by (what Alec might call an excessive amount of) hair oil. It gleams in the natural light that floods the office. He stands and turns when he hears the two enter the room, and his wide smile reminds Alec distinctly of a smarmy used car salesman.</p><p>“Alec, this is Mr. Lorenzo Rey. Lorenzo, this is my son, Alec,” Maryse introduces the two men, her polite business smile in full effect. Alec, still uncertain of his mother’s game plan, raises an eyebrow, but otherwise tries not to let his confusion show. He extends his hand for a handshake and Lorenzo grips it tight. The man’s hold on Alec’s hand lingers, and the corners of Alec’s mouth turns down in a grimace for a moment before he can hide it behind a professional tight-lipped smile.</p><p>“Please, have a seat,” Maryse points at the second open seat. Lorenzo finally breaks the handshake and sits back down to the chair he had been occupying before the Lightwoods entered the room.</p><p>“Alec, Lorenzo is joining you on Mr. Baybrook’s legal team,” she delves right in.</p><p>“He what?”</p><p>“Lorenzo is consulting with us, and will be assisting you in the Baybrook case. It’s been discussed and confirmed with Mr. Baybrook already,” she says again with finality.</p><p>Alec knows that there won’t be any further discussion on this, “will I still be taking the lead on the case?”</p><p>Maryse starts putting files together distractedly, as if this meeting has already served its purpose and Alec stews in his seat, “you’ll be co-counsel. I expect you to share your progress and collaborate with Lorenzo throughout the case.”</p><p>Lorenzo clasps his hands together gleefully, “I’m looking forward to our collaboration, Mr. Lightwood! Would you like to get started now? Perhaps over coffee?”</p><p>Alec’s mouth is stretched tight, eyes squinted in suspicion - he can’t see his own face, but he imagines it’s close to what Andrew calls his “bitch face”.</p><p>“Mr. Rey,” he starts,</p><p>“Please, call me Lorenzo.”</p><p>“...Lorenzo,” Alec amends, “I have quite a bit of work to do. Perhaps we can touch base again later this week? I can send you the relevant documents before then, so you have some time to review the case on your own before we reconnect.”</p><p>“Surely you have time for a coffee, Alec,” his mother interjects, and Alec starts to piece together what his mother is aiming at. He forces a smile, formulating his escape plan.</p><p>“Perhaps if I was given some advanced notice,” he says, voice taut.</p><p>Lorenzo raises his hands, palms out, as if he’s surrendering to something. The theatrics feel superficial - it’s a miracle that Alec manages not to roll his eyes.</p><p>“Not a problem! I look forward to seeing those client files… and that coffee,” he winks, and it takes everything in Alec not to physically recoil. He keeps the polite business smile plastered on his face, and nods. Maryse narrows her eyes, lips pursed, but drops the subject.</p><p>“Well in that case, Alec, why don’t you at least walk Lorenzo out,” she motions toward the door.</p><p>“Actually, Mother,” he bites out, “I had a few notes I wanted to go over with you if you have a moment now.”</p><p>Lorenzo stands with a chuckle, “ah, no need to fret, I can find my way out. It was a pleasure meeting you, Mr. Lightwood. And a pleasure seeing you as usual, Maryse.”</p><p>As clueless as he may be, Alec is relieved to see that Lorenzo doesn’t linger; simply nodding at the Lightwoods and heading out the door.</p><p>Alec doesn’t wait a moment after the door closes, furious eyes snapping back to his mother.</p><p>“Mother, what was that?”</p><p>“What, Alec?” She responds, exasperation clear in her voice. One that Alec matches in his response.</p><p>“Co-counsel? <em> Coffee</em>?”</p><p>Maryse sighs, “fine. Lightwood &amp; Associates is considering a merger with Lorenzo Rey’s firm.”</p><p>The statement diffuses Alec’s frustration in an instant, “what? You never mentioned this before.”</p><p>“Well… I’d like to avoid it if possible, but with the way things are going since your father and my separation, it may become a necessity more than a choice.”</p><p>“Why is this the first I’m hearing about this?” Alec frowns, “Mom, if you want me to eventually run the firm, then I need to know these things…!”</p><p>“It’s still my firm and I’m still making the decisions around here,” Maryse snaps back. She clearly didn’t expect to have this conversation with Alec today, and that frustrates Alec even further.</p><p>“...and coffee?” He crosses his arm and tilts his head to the side. His eyes sit low as he glowers at her.</p><p>Maryse has the decency to look slightly abashed at this, “Lorenzo is single, and shares your… taste in men,” Alec bites down on his cheek to avoid starting another fight, “if you two got along, I thought it would look good for the possible merger.”</p><p>“You were trying to pawn me off. To Lorenzo Rey.” Alec keeps his voice measured, resolutely keeping his anger hidden behind his impassive demeanor.</p><p>“Oh don’t be so melodramatic, Alec.” She waves her hand dismissively, “who doesn’t love a power couple?”</p><p>Alec stands up slowly, he puts all his energy into keeping his tone level and calm, “I think we’re done here. I’ll keep you updated on the Baybrook case as needed.”</p><p>Maryse calls his name as he exits the room, but Alec leaves before he can lose control over his temper.</p><p><br/>**********************</p><p> </p><p>“Your mother did what?”</p><p>Alec is sporting a massive scowl that he’s well known for, arms crossed over his chest. He had just told Andrew about his meeting with Lorenzo.</p><p>“Tried to set me up with some sleaze for a political arrangement. You heard me right.”</p><p>Andrew winces apologetically as he pours chips into a bowl, “yikes.”</p><p>Alec sighs and takes a sip of his beer. The two men stand in the kitchen, putting together a small spread of snacks while they chat. The sound of laughter flows in from the living room and Alec’s shoulders seem to drop even lower. Izzy’s taken the liberty of inviting Victor over to Jace and Alec’s condo for a “quiet night in” and Jace is out with Clary, so not only is he reeling from the events of the afternoon, he’s stuck unexpectedly hosting a social gathering as well. His friend places a sympathetic hand on his shoulder.</p><p>“You could ask them to leave, you know?”</p><p>Alec shakes his head, “Izzy seems to like the guy, and there’s no way Mom would approve. This way at least I know what she’s up to.”</p><p>“She’s legally an adult, Alec. You can’t be responsible for her every action,” Andrew replies. Alec knows he’s right; he knows that he needs to hear the reminder every now and then. As if they offer some sort of absolution from the duty he feels to protect his siblings. He sends his friend a weary smile that Andrew returns, but he doesn’t respond.</p><p>Victor Aldertree has quickly become a fixture in Izzy’s social life; since meeting him only a week and a half ago, it seems Izzy’s spent quite a bit of time with him. Alec knows very little about the man, who only recently moved to New York. In the few times Alec’s seen Izzy during that time, she’s been looking tired, but has explained it was due to balancing her studies with her robust social schedule. Alec can’t help but worry that there’s something else going on. He knows Andrew’s right, he also knows that he should trust his sister, but the more overbearing and obsessive Maryse gets, the more Izzy seems to rebel. Not to mention the fact that Alec is hesitant to trust Victor.</p><p>“I just don’t know about Aldertree,” he says as he scoops out some dip into a smaller bowl, he lowers his voice, “he pops up out of nowhere and now has her wrapped around his finger…”</p><p>“You haven’t even gotten a chance to get to know him,” counters Andrew.</p><p>“Andrew, you should’ve seen how Magnus looked at him. He must know something about Aldertree. That level of hatred is not normal.”</p><p>“So now you trust Magnus’ judgement? Magnus also hated you for no reason,” Andrew tips his beer bottle toward Alec, brows furrowed, and Alec has no response to that. He’s right. Alec can’t explain his sudden willingness to trust Magnus Bane.</p><p>“Fine,” he sighs, “I’ll… try to get to know him.”</p><p>His delivery is stiff and it elicits a snort of laughter from the other man, “how big of you,” he mutters with a roll of his eyes.</p><p>When they step out into the living room, Izzy and Victor lean in toward each other, laughing on the couch. Izzy looks up at the men who enter and gestures them over.</p><p>“Alec, Andrew! Victor was just telling me about a funny story from his work!” She nudges Victor, prompting him to repeat the story for the two.</p><p>Andrew chuckles as he places the chips and dip on the coffee table, “actually, I don’t think I’ve heard what you do for work.”</p><p>“I’m a collector of sorts. I procure rare merchandise for high end clientele,” Victor responds with an easy smile. The knot in Alec’s stomach tightens a bit.</p><p>“Of sorts? Is it a legal operation?”</p><p>“Alec!” Izzy gasps at the invasive question, but Alec doesn’t flinch. His eyes are trained on the other man as he takes a seat perpendicular to the sofa the two occupy.</p><p>“I’m a lawyer, Izzy, it’s my job to uphold the law,”</p><p>His sister scoffs, “please, when was the last time you or Mom defended an innocent client?”</p><p>Alec freezes, the words causing a sharp pain in his chest. He has no comeback; it’s the truth.</p><p>For a split second, he sees regret flash through Izzy’s eyes, but it’s gone as soon as he sees it, and Alec wonders if he imagined it. It’s strange, he thinks, that she would be the one to throw this truth in his face. The sibling who knows him better than most; in some ways, even better than Jace. He takes a moment to focus on her, her beautiful face now stubbornly hardened. Her diverted eyes glisten (with tears of anger? Hurt?) - her brows creased, but slanted at the ends (with resentment? Concern? Alec can’t tell anymore). The way she purses her lips, so similar to their mother. But in this moment she looks so young, like an admonished child lashing out in frustration. She looks tired of fighting, her skin slightly pale… from what? Alec can’t help but wonder. He can’t help but worry.</p><p>But it isn’t worth the fight; at least not now.</p><p>He lets out a long exhale, consciously releasing the tension he was holding in his shoulders.</p><p>“You’re right. I’m sorry for interrupting you, Victor,” he sighs. Victor, seemingly unfazed by the siblings’ spat, shakes his head gently.</p><p>“It’s fine, I understand that your concern lies with your sister.”</p><p> </p><p>The evening after that goes relatively smoothly. Alec, while still feeling off-kilter from his earlier confrontation with Izzy, at least tries to be friendly with her friend.</p><p>“I’m going to grab another beer, anyone want anything else?” He asks as he stands, and when the rest of the group shake their heads, he makes his way to the kitchen.</p><p>“Alec, may I have a moment?”</p><p>Alec jumps when he hears a voice behind him. He hadn’t noticed Victor sneak up on him and his hackles rise at how quietly the man seems to be able to get around. He narrows his eyes and closes the fridge, beer in hand.</p><p>“Uh, sure,” he pops open the bottle, “what do you want?”</p><p>“Perhaps we can speak somewhere in private?” Victor tilts his head, his eyes dart to the living room where the others are. The caginess has Alec on high alert, but he nods and leads the man toward the balcony.</p><p>The air outside is cool to the touch, even though they’re well into spring. Alec leans on the railing, patiently waiting to hear what Victor has to say to him. Victor stands against the handrail, a short distance from where Alec stops, and gazes out at the city.</p><p>“Beautiful view you have here,” he muses.</p><p>“You didn’t ask me to talk just to discuss the view, did you?”</p><p>“You’re right, I didn’t,” Victor laughs, “I’m not a monster, you know?”</p><p>The matter-of-fact words catch Alec off guard, but he tries not to let it show. He glances over at the other man who continues,</p><p>“I don’t know why you’ve decided that I can’t be trusted, but I promise you I’m not a bad guy. And I may be off base here, tell me if I am, but I’m wondering if Magnus Bane’s response to seeing me may have planted that seed of doubt in your mind…”</p><p>Victor’s voice remains smooth, deep, and rich (and <em> sickly sweet… sticky </em>, Alec thinks); for some reason it only works to increase Alec’s unease. The man doesn’t look away from the cityscape as he talks. Alec feels something tighten in his chest. He wants to deny it. To tell Victor it has nothing to do with Magnus, but he can’t seem to find the words to do so; the memory of Magnus’ icy glare flashes in Alec’s mind every time he sees Victor.</p><p>“The truth is,” Victor turns to look straight into Alec’s eyes, “I’m actually acquainted with Magnus from Boston. We have a bit of a… troubled history, you could say.” His eyes flicker uncertainly back at the city.</p><p>“I was close friends with Simon Lewis - he’s basically like a brother to Magnus Bane, perhaps a couple years older than Isabelle. Magnus took him under his wing many years ago when he was having family troubles… but that’s beside the point.</p><p>“I met Simon in school; I was a non-traditional student and Simon was mature beyond his years with a lot more life experience compared to his peers. We became friends. I didn’t have my business yet, so I was just scraping by. Magnus’ businesses were just starting to take off at the time, and, well… he determined that I was a bad influence on Simon.”</p><p>The crease between Alec’s eyes deepens, “why?”</p><p>Victor leans against the railing, mirroring Alec’s stance. His eyes steadily taking in Manhattan at night “I was distributing weed as a means for income… nothing harmful. But Magnus clearly thought otherwise. He came to my home, threatened me - told me to stay away from Simon. I declined and tried to explain to him that he misunderstood me, but to no avail. Not too long after, I got a surprise visit from the police. They searched my home and found drugs that weren’t mine… much more serious than weed. I tried to tell them that I was being framed, that the drugs were planted, but Magnus Bane is an influential man…” He pauses and shivers, eyes dazed, far away. “Thankfully, I had a few connections myself. Managed to strike a deal, avoided prison. But well, now, with my record, I don’t have much in terms of options for work.”</p><p>Alec feels dizzy from the sudden influx of information. He looks at the other man in utter disbelief.</p><p>“Are you saying that Magnus set you up…?”</p><p>He shrugs, “I don’t see any other explanation to it. Magnus Bane can be the most generous man to those he cares deeply for, but if he deems you unworthy, he can be downright cruel.”</p><p>Alec thinks back to all of his interactions with Magnus. Everything leading up to the moment they shared in the alleyway, and all he can recall until then is aloof indifference and cold shoulders. Magnus misjudged him without basis; is it really so unbelievable that Magnus cast judgement on someone else who didn’t deserve it? A storm brews in Alec’s gut.</p><p>If so, has Alec been doing the exact same thing to Victor? His mind spins at this revelation.</p><p>“I’m sorry,” is all he manages to get out.</p><p>“It’s alright, really. I’ve been through worse,” Victor says, as he pushes away from the railing, “I just wanted to explain myself.”</p><p>Alec nods silently; he doesn’t know what to say, to think.</p><p>“We should get back before the others start to worry.”</p><p>“You,” his voice comes out raspy and he clears his throat, “you go ahead. I’ll be there soon.”</p><p>When he’s finally alone, Alec lets out a long breath that he didn’t realize he was holding. He starts tapping the neck of the beer bottle against the handrail as he stands with his thoughts.</p><p>He doesn’t know why Victor’s story impacted him so deeply. Why he’s so upset by the realization that Magnus is, as he had originally assumed, a presumptuous, judgemental prick.</p><p>Alec counts the tapping of the beer bottle in an attempt to calm his frayed nerves. His thoughts wander to piercing eyes, highlighted in silver and gold. Disappointment simmers beneath his skin, and he tries to push those warm, deep brown eyes far from his thoughts as he watches the moon rise high over the city.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I’m sorry for the lack of Magnus in this chapter! Next week’s chapter is a bit longer and it should more than make up for it, though (I hope!) ;)<br/>As usual, I love hearing from you, so if you feel inclined to leave a kudos or a comment, it is much appreciated! And if social media is your thing, I’m on Twitter (@ tsujiharud) or Instagram (@ tsuji.haru.d) as well.</p><p>tsujiharu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. To be Fond of Dancing</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“Penny for your thoughts?” Alec jumps at the sudden interruption. Andrew peers over his friend and smiles easily.<br/>“Magnus.”<br/>Magnus Bane narrows his eyes, his mouth curved up in a grin.<br/>“Andrew, I hope you forgive me. I was hoping to steal Alexander for a moment,” he reaches an arm out to lay gently on Alec’s forearm, and Alec’s brain stops functioning, “he owes me a dance.”</p><p>***</p><p>Alec tries to stay away from Magnus, but there’s this gala - oh, and there’s also dancing.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Friday, everyone! Glad to see we all agree that Aldertree is SUS. As promised, this is a longer chapter with some more quality Malec content, and also some more Underhill content because honestly I’m having a little too much fun writing Underhill. Haha<br/>I really love seeing your comments! Each one makes me smile, so thank you so much for those who have left me any feedback so far! I hope this chapter you enjoy the chapter :)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>After his conversation with Victor, Alec doesn’t see Magnus Bane for a couple of weeks. It isn’t entirely consciously done, he’s had reason to decline Jace’s invitations to hang out with Clary (and by extension Magnus), with work being extremely busy (although if he <em> is </em> putting in a few extra hours so that he doesn’t feel like he’s making up excuses, no one needs to know).  He doesn’t necessarily warm up to Victor either, nowhere near what would be considered friendly, but he’s less antagonistic when Izzy brings him around. Work really <em> has </em> been a pain; the Baybrook case is becoming a larger headache than he expected, with another witness coming forward about the “alleged” discrimination. He’s been working late nights looking at contract clauses and loopholes that might get his client off the hook, and the whole situation has been taking an emotional toll on the man. Not to mention spending more time on the Baybrook case means being forced to spend more time with Lorenzo Rey. The man is just as insufferable as Alec had initially expected him to be, consistently trying to impress Alec with stories that not-so-subtly showcase his wealth and prosperity, but the fact does nothing to dissuade Maryse from her attempts at matchmaking, insisting that her eldest son to spend more “quality time” with him. </p><p>Which is why Alec shouldn’t be surprised when he finds himself in his mother’s office, across from the woman who sits behind her oak desk. The <em> clack clack clack </em> of Maryse’s fingertips on her keyboard rings loudly in the otherwise silent room. Alec lets the tension fill the space between them before he opens his mouth to respond.</p><p>“You’ve got to be kidding me.”</p><p>The frustration is obvious his voice. Maryse lifts her eyes from her computer monitor to look at him with a stern raised eyebrow.</p><p>“I think I’ve made myself perfectly clear. You are to attend the charity gala next week to represent the firm and the family; I’ve secured tickets for Jace and Isabelle as well,” she says, tapping her fingernails on her desk as she talks.</p><p>“You know that wasn’t what I meant,” Alec counters.</p><p>Maryse sighs, “you will accompany Lorenzo to the event.” There’s a finality to her words, the clipped tone to say she won’t argue about this. But Alec’s not done with the conversation.</p><p>“Mother -”</p><p>“Alexander, I need you to think of the family and the future of this firm. I need to ensure that you have a firm to take over when the time comes, and if that means a merger with Rey -”</p><p>“We can negotiate a merger without my personal life getting involved,” he pleads. He tries to keep his voice steady, but he can feel his emotions bubbling right below his skin, ready to erupt at any moment.</p><p>“We could, but there’s a lot riding on this,” Maryse says, pointedly looking back down at her computer, as if to indicate that the conversation is unwelcome (Alec has no doubt that it is).</p><p>“No! My life is not up for negotiation,” he can’t help the agitation that surfaces in his voice as he tries to thread together his thoughts. He stammers, frustrated and angry, “to - to be used as some sort of pawn in your plans...!”</p><p>“It’s <em> our </em> lives, Alexander. <em> Our </em> legacy. You will go to the gala with Lorenzo. You’re welcome to bring a friend. Lorenzo has his own ticket and each of you are allowed a plus one, but make no mistake that you are there <em> with </em> Lorenzo Rey.” Her voice is raised and this time Alec knows better than to continue arguing. He stares at her, brows creased and eyes narrowed.</p><p>His mother has always been a stern woman, hardened from both the professional and personal challenges of her life. Still, there was a time when she was softer, more loving. Less stubborn and self-righteous - less proud. Alec should know better by now that his mother’s love isn’t unconditional, after spending so long trying to gain acceptance for his sexuality. And yet he sits in her office, shocked at how she could care so little about the lives of her children. The fiery eyes that glare back at him seem so foreign, and Alec - for a single moment - desperately tries to find the tenderness that he recalls from his youth. All he sees is hunger. He stands without a word, and leaves the room.</p><p>The deafening silence says it all.</p><p>
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</p><p>****************</p><p>
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</p><p>By the time the evening of the gala actually comes around, Alec’s anxiety is at an all-time high. While galas are not something Alec inherently dislikes (he appreciates the philanthropic aspects of it, even if most of the attendees still manage to do it for personal gain), this event is quickly turning into Alec’s personal nightmare. Soon after his conversation with his mother, he found out his brother had invited Clary, which is unsurprising, but Jace then informed him that Magnus had also gotten a ticket to the event. Since hearing Victor’s story about Magnus, Alec has tried to bury whatever moment they may have shared that night in the alleyway. Even if Victor did embellish his tale, Alec imagines there has to be at least a little truth to it. Regardless, it only adds fuel to the blaring warning signals that flood Alec’s senses anytime he’s near Magnus Bane (which has absolutely nothing to do with the inexplicable pull he feels toward the man - nothing at all). To complicate matters more, Izzy had invited Victor. If you add the fact that he was supposed to show up as Lorenzo’s <em> date </em>, Alec is left with no source of comfort for the evening aside from Andrew, who’s attending as Alec’s plus one. Alec isn’t sure how he would survive without his personal social savior - or how he ever functioned before meeting him (he didn’t, he was a hostile disaster whenever interacting with anyone besides family), but Andrew agreed to join him with his usual kindness.</p><p> </p><p>The LIghtwoods arrive in style in a sleek black car; cameras flash loudly as the siblings step out of the vehicle, with Andrew following closely behind them. Victor suggested meeting them at the venue when Izzy mentioned concerns about their mother seeing them photographed together leaving the car. Clary is arriving with Jonathan and Magnus, and Alec’s also managed to convince Lorenzo to meet him at the event, using his siblings as an excuse. So it’s just the four of them, of which Alec is extremely grateful for. He’s glad to get a moment of comfort before he has to face the public. The incessant snaps of the cameras grate at Alec’s ears, tugging at the frayed nerves that he tried so hard to calm in the car ride over. The photos upon arrival is one of his least favorite parts of events like these; Alec can’t imagine anyone giving an actual shit about what B-list socialites (although he’d never use those words in front of his mother) wear to a charity gala. The only one who has a social media following is Izzy, and rightfully so because she is dressed to kill today. Her ruby red off-shoulder evening gown sheens with each flash of the camera, and her hair that flows loosely down one shoulder sways with every step she takes. She makes the three men, each dressed impeccably in custom made designer suits (Alec leaves this part to his mother, and couldn’t tell you who cut his suit if his life depends on it), just look like her accessories for the evening. But Alec still makes the obligatory number of pauses with his siblings and friend and before wandering into the venu.</p><p>As soon as they enter, Izzy begins looking around for Victor. She scans the room while the group gets directed to their table, and her brows furrow in concern when she can’t seem to find him. She pulls her phone out once they’re seated, and Alec notices her face fall immediately.</p><p>“What’s wrong, Izzy?” He asks. He leans in and places a comforting hand on her shoulder.</p><p>“He isn’t coming,” she replies. Her voice is soft, and Alec thinks he hears a hint of something he can’t place a finger on laced within her disappointment.</p><p>Jace, who had been distracted looking for Clary, turns to Izzy at those words. “What happened?”</p><p>“Some work thing,” Izzy tosses her phone back into her purse, and brings her fingers up to rub at her temple. She lets out a shaky breath.</p><p>“I’m sorry, Iz,” Alec grimaces, sympathetically, “but the event should still be great. An excuse to dress up, eat good food, and dance? Can’t go wrong, right?”</p><p>Izzy curls her lips in between her teeth, nervously chewing at the corner, but points a tight smile toward her brothers.</p><p>“Right, of course,” she shakes her head, “it’s just, he was supposed to bring me something. But I can get it from him next time.”</p><p>“What is it? Do you want to go pick it up after the event?” Alec tries, hoping to lift his sister’s spirits, but Izzy just shakes her head again.</p><p>“It isn’t important. Just something I lent him last time we were together.” She gives them another rigid smile and sighs, “but you’re right. It’s silly to let that ruin my night! It’s probably for the best. If any of Mom’s friends saw us, she’d probably be hounding me for his life story by tomorrow morning.”</p><p>Jace and Andrew laugh at the comment, but Alec has never been good at finding humor in his mother’s irrational obsession with societal hierarchy. Instead he takes a sip of the water that was placed in front of him and takes a cursory glance across the room. He almost chokes on his water when he sees Lorenzo’s skeevy smirk in the distance. Thankfully he doesn’t think the man’s noticed him yet, and Alec unconsciously slumps in his chair trying to make himself look less noticeable.</p><p>“What... are you doing, Alec?” Confusion is clear in Izzy’s voice as she stares at her brother’s suspicious actions.</p><p>“He’s here,” Alec whines around his water glass, trying to sink lower into his chair.</p><p>Jace snorts, “Alec, you’re a giant. You look ridiculous, and if anything you’re even more obvious.”</p><p>Andrew looks around, trying to find the man who Alec’s been complaining about for the better half of a month. When he sees the signature ponytail, a soft, almost amused smile spreads across his face.</p><p>“He’s handsome.”</p><p>Alec’s eyes widen in disbelief. Is his friend seeing the same plastered on grin as he is? The oily hair? When Andrew sees the horrified expression, the edges of his eyes crinkle slyly.</p><p>“I think you’re just biased because of your introduction,” he muses as he runs a hand through his hair (Alec doesn’t dare ask why he’s prepping his sexy bedhead look), “playing your buffer tonight suddenly got a lot more interesting.”</p><p>Alec knows he’s now full-on gawking at his friend who just laughs airily. He pats Alec on the shoulder a couple of times.</p><p>“Now now, Alec. You may want to put your bitchface away. He’s heading our way.”</p><p>“Mr. Lightwood!” Alec only has a second to sit up straight and wipe away his “bitchface” before the (almost too) jubilant voice thunders over their table.</p><p>“Lorenzo. I see that you made it,” he says noncommittally. He manages a polite smile, but almost lets it slip when he sees that Izzy and Jace are barely holding it together watching him squirm. “These are my siblings, Jace and Izzy. And my friend,”</p><p>“Andrew Underhill.” Andrew holds out a hand for Lorenzo to shake, a charming quirk to his lips (Alec tries not to gape), “Alec’s told me a lot about you.”</p><p>“All good things, I hope?”</p><p>“Oh, only the best.”</p><p>Izzy snorts, but manages to cover it up with a cough. She takes a sip of her water and smiles sweetly at Lorenzo. Thankfully, the man seems to think nothing of it. He glances subtly toward Andrew, but quickly turns his focus back on Alec.</p><p>“Mr. Lightwood - before we get along with this evening… I don’t know what your mother’s told you, and I hope it isn’t too forward of me, but I would love nothing more than to remain by your side this evening and get to know you a bit more… personally.”</p><p>At that, the whole table freezes. All eyes are on Alec; looking entertained as they wait for his response (Jace looks just about ready to grab some popcorn). Alec feels an uncomfortable sweat start to rise on his back, his suit jacket suddenly way too warm. He opens and closes his mouth a few times before he stands up abruptly.</p><p>“Drinks. I need a drink.” It isn’t a smooth transition whatsoever and Lorenzo looks confused, but Alec couldn’t care less in the moment.</p><p>“I could join -”</p><p>“Jace! Do you want a drink? You want a drink.” He interrupts Lorenzo before he has a chance to finish the thought and grabs Jace by his arm. Jace is not subtle about fighting back his laughter, his shoulders are shaking and Alec can see he’s chewing on his cheek that ticks upward with the edge of his lips.</p><p>“Yeah, a drink sounds great. Andrew, Lorenzo, you want anything?” Asks Jace, who still seems to have a little more social decorum than Alec can manage. Izzy looks slightly offended at being left out, but she relents with a pout. Andrew and Lorenzo each request a drink and Alec’s glad Jace is paying attention because all he can think about is getting away from the table. When they finally step away, Alec lets the mortification show on his face and Jace begins cackling.</p><p>“Dude!” He slaps his brother on the back between heaves of laughter. “That guy is something! No wonder you’re so pissed at Mom!”</p><p>Alec looks around to make sure they aren’t being followed, his eyes still scanning their surroundings as he clasps a hand on Jace’s shoulder. “I need alcohol if I’m going to survive the night.” Jace’s laughter only gets bigger.</p><p> </p><p>They quickly make their way to the bar and order the round of drinks for the table. The high pitched screech comes as they stand waiting for their order.</p><p>“Jace Lightwood?!”</p><p>Jace’s full-body cringe can’t be disguised. The two men turn around to see a petite girl shooting daggers at the blonde, hands placed intimidatingly on her hips.</p><p>“Uhhhh…. Lizzy?”</p><p>“It’s Lily, thanks,” the girl says, unamused, “and thanks for calling, by the way! God I can’t believe I was so <em> stupid</em>!!!”</p><p>If they weren’t in public (at an event with photographers, nonetheless), Alec would have probably found the situation entertaining. <em> You reap what you sow </em>, Izzy’s teasing words echo in his mind. But the girl doesn’t seem to care about the scene she’s causing, and people are watching. Jace also notices, so he puts a placating hand up between them,</p><p>“Hey, hey, Lily. I get it. I was an asshole, and I’m sorry…” he starts. He keeps his voice level and, much to Alec’s surprise, it sounds sincere. Lily looks at him suspiciously, eyebrow raised and arms crossed. She seems ready to keep arguing.</p><p>“You deserve a proper explanation, whether it’s a good one or not. Do you wanna take this somewhere a bit more quiet?” Jace asks, tipping his head toward a hallway in the back where less guests are coming and going from. The girl hesitates but agrees.</p><p>“This doesn’t mean you’re off the hook!” She hisses, and Jace chuckles.</p><p>“Alec, do you mind bringing the drinks back?” He turns to Alec, apologetic. Alec nods and waves them away. He quirks a brow and watches the two weave through the crowd, who are quickly losing interest now that the fight is over. Jace leads Lily along with a hand resting on her lower back. If this were pre-Clary Jace, Alec would have no doubt he was looking for a quickie. But now, he can’t imagine Jace even considering it. His brother has been smitten with Clary, that’s for sure, but it’s more than that. He seems happier. Calmer. And it’s not hard to connect the dots. He smiles at the thought, happy for his brother. While Alec may question his brother’s habits with women, Jace is someone Alec knows he can always count on. Protective of those he loves, and loyal to a fault; Alec’s always felt like he was waiting for the right woman that would tear down the defenses of his playboy facade. If Clary could break through those walls, then she’s a lucky woman.</p><p>“Hello, Alexander.”</p><p>He’s lost in his thoughts when a lush, velvet voice calls his name, and Alec feels his heart skip a beat.</p><p>“...Magnus.”</p><p>Glittery, warm, deep brown eyes that he’s tried to keep locked away in his mind are now pointed at him, and somehow they’re even brighter than he remembered. Alec’s stomach twists into knots when his eyes flicker down to see the coy smirk on Magnus’ face, and he flushes when he realizes he’s caught, yet again, looking at the man’s lips. Magnus lets out a pleased hum that Alec doesn’t know what to do with.</p><p>“Clary is with Izzy asking for Jace, but is he… occupied?” He gives a fleeting look toward the corridor where Jace and Lily disappeared, and Alec tenses defensively. Did Magnus witness the argument? What did he make of it? Is he casting judgement on Jace? On his family? ...on him? He feels a flash of embarrassment as the final thought runs through his mind.</p><p>“He’ll be back soon,” Alec snaps back, turning his body toward the bar and finding their drinks ready. A ringed hand reaches out from the side.</p><p>“Please, Alexander, allow me to help. We’re headed back to the same table, after all.” Magnus gives him a tight smile that leaves Alec tongue-tied yet again. It’s infuriating how the man can fluster him with a single word - with only his name. And his full name, at that. He should tell Magnus that he hates when people call him “Alexander”, and yet he hasn’t. He doesn’t. Instead he nods, a gentle blush warming his ears, unsure of what to say to this man who he’s vowed to stay away from, but stubbornly won’t leave his mind (<em>as if that’s his fault</em>).</p><p>The two men grab the drinks and make their way back to their table. Much to Alec’s relief, Lorenzo is deep in conversation with Andrew, who looks happily engaged.<em> Can’t account for taste</em>, Alec thinks to himself as he takes in the sight of his friend leaning in closer to the older man. Lorenzo seems more carefree when speaking with Andrew, and Alec can’t help but wonder if Andrew was right about Alec’s judgement of Lorenzo.</p><p>Jace comes back to join them just as dinner is about to be served. He slides into the seat next to Clary, giving her a chaste peck on the cheek. Alec sees the way they smile at each other, as if they’re the only two in the world, glowing in unrestrained joy. He doesn’t think he’ll ever tire of seeing that look on his brother. He notices Magnus casting them a sideways glance as well, but he looks less adoring. His expression is blank and unreadable, making Alec shift uncomfortably in his seat. The movement must’ve caught his eye, because Magnus’ eyes now drift to land on Alec. He looks surprised to see the man staring at him (though Alec can’t imagine why considering it’s already happened an embarrassing number of times), but his surprise quickly turns into a soft smile. Alec swears he can see fondness in the man’s eyes, but tramps down the thought as soon as it rises. He tries to remind himself of Victor’s story and of the judgement that was made against him just because of his parents. But instead, all Alec can think about is the alleyway and Magnus’ cheeky grin and midnight blue fingers tapping on glossy lips, and,</p><p>“Alec?”</p><p>Izzy’s voice cuts through the haze that Alec’s found himself in. Heat rises to his face, he can feel it creeping up his neck and to the tips of his ears. His sister’s eyes widen almost imperceptibly as realization dawn in her face. Her eyes dart toward Magnus whose lips are turned up in the faintest of smiles as he shifts his focus, just in time for Izzy to catch, then they swing back to her brother.</p><p>“Oh my god, Alec,” Izzy’s voice is a whisper, but she’s still hastily shushed by her brother. With any luck, the earth would open up and eat him whole just about now, but Alec’s never been so lucky. Izzy’s eyebrows can’t go any higher and she gasps with an open mouthed grin. Why does she have to be so perceptive? Or is he just so obvious? <em> Fuck. Is </em> he so obvious? Does Magnus know? Alec is flooded by a wave of panic. He’s contemplating just running away and calling it a night when a server leans over him with a plate of food. Izzy smirks at him knowingly, settling back into her seat, but thankfully seems content to drop the subject for now. A low grumble escapes Alec’s throat as he succumbs to his fate. He’ll have to suffer through dinner, at least.</p><p> </p><p>Much to his surprise, dinner isn’t an unpleasant affair. Sitting between his sister and friend (who somehow manipulated Lorenzo to take the seat on the other side of him - Andrew truly is a social wizard), Alec manages to avoid any uncomfortable conversations. Magnus sits directly across from him, as engaging as ever. He even gets Jonathan, who sits beside him, involved in the conversations, which is no easy feat. Clary and Jace fluctuate between engaging with the table and getting lost in their own world, as do Andrew and Lorenzo. Izzy, being the social butterfly that she is, joins Magnus in leading the conversations, making it easy for Alec to just nod along as needed. It isn’t unpleasant, but it is draining. Alec steadfastly keeps his eyes averted from Magnus, not wanting to give away more than he already has. But even without looking, he can feel the weight of the other man’s eyes on him. Each time he does, heat rises to his cheeks.</p><p>As soon as the meal is over, Alec whisks Andrew away to the bar for a moment of peace.</p><p>“You doing okay there, buddy?” His friend peeks into his face after Alec chugs a drink in one large gulp.</p><p>“Define okay,” Alec sounds miserable as he clears his throat, trying to rid it of the sting of alcohol. “Thanks for keeping Lorenzo company, by the way. I owe you.”</p><p>The man shakes his head. “He isn’t bad once he lets his guard down. Your loss is my gain.” He flashes a playful grin. Alec rolls his eyes.</p><p>“Have at it.”</p><p>The two men lean back against the bar, looking out at the crowds who have started gathering at the dance floor. Now that dinner is over, the DJ is ramping up the music. Among the mass, he sees a flash of bright red hair. Clary and Jace are dancing, but at a bit of a distance (at least for Jace’s standards).</p><p>“Do you think Jace will finally make a move on Clary?” He cocks his head toward Andrew, who releases a thoughtful <em> hm</em>.</p><p>“I think he should, if he doesn’t want to lose her,” he replies humorlessly. “Otherwise Clary might start thinking she’s getting strung along.”</p><p>The response catches Alec off guard - a rush of defensiveness for his brother flooding him. Jace may have made some mistakes along the way, but he’s clearly taken by Clary.</p><p>“What do you mean? Considering his reputation, I’d think Clary would assume the opposite.”</p><p>“<em>Especially </em> because of his reputation, Alec. For all we know, she thinks that he wants to sleep with every girl but her.” Andrew remains impassive, shrugging off Alec’s animosity. It makes him stop and think. Could she possibly? She seems just as affected by Jace as he is by her. He watches the couple from a distance, trying to see more in Clary’s bright green eyes and full-faced smile.</p><p>“We know Jace, so we see it as clear as day,” his friend continues, “but Clary, Magnus, and Jonathan don’t. Not the way we do. I think they’ve spent plenty of time getting to know each other, and if Jace wants more, he should act now.”</p><p>The words settle in the air. Alec chews at his lower lip, pondering whether Andrew might have a point.</p><p>“Penny for your thoughts?” Alec jumps at the sudden interruption. Andrew peers over his friend and smiles easily.</p><p>“Magnus.”</p><p>Magnus Bane narrows his eyes, his mouth curved up in a grin.</p><p>“Andrew, I hope you forgive me. I was hoping to steal Alexander for a moment,” he reaches an arm out to lay gently on Alec’s forearm, and Alec’s brain stops functioning, “he owes me a dance.”</p><p>The man’s voice is lowered, his tone rich (and flirtatious? Alec can’t help but wonder). Andrew looks between the two men in surprise, but recovers quickly.</p><p>“Of course,” he chuckles.</p><p>“I think Lorenzo was missing your company back at the table,” Magnus winks, as if he’s suggesting a counteroffer; it only makes Andrew laugh harder. He leans in close to Alec’s ear and whispers a quick “good luck”. Then he’s gone, leaving Alec standing stiff, jaw clenched and his hands gripped into white knuckles. He can hear his heartbeat in his ears. The song playing now is coming to an end, and Magnus extends a hand toward him.</p><p>“May I have the next dance?” The invitation is playful, but infinitely gentle, giving Alec plenty of room to decline. Alec feels like he’s back in the alley behind Pandemonium. He opens his mouth to say no, but just like before, the words don’t come. Instead, he takes Magnus’ offered hand.</p><p>The touch sends a jolt of electricity down his spine, leaving him feeling tingly in his limbs, but he stops himself from flinching away. He keeps his eyes focused on Magnus’, looking for something to ground him; they look back at him with such tenderness. Magnus leads them to the dance floor as the current song winds down, the intro to the next song fading into life. It’s a slower song, and Magnus tucks his chin and looks at him through lowered lashes - <em> may I? </em> He asks without words as he brings a hesitant hand toward Alec’s waist. Alec nods and places his own hand on the other man’s firm bicep. Their opposite hands find each other, and Magnus starts moving.</p><p>It isn’t surprising that Magnus Bane is a terrific dancer, the man owns several clubs after all. But as he leads Alec in steps and spins in the four-count beat of the song, Alec can’t help but be impressed at how skilled he is at leading. Maryse made all her children take classes for the basics, but Alec has never considered himself anything but sub-par when it came to partner dancing (not to mention he is an absolute nightmare at a dance club). Still, Magnus’ graceful movements transfer to Alec as they move in tandem, and as much as Alec hates to admit it, he’s enjoying himself for perhaps the first time tonight. The tension slowly drains from his shoulders, and he finds himself settling into Magnus’ soft touch.</p><p>“So,” Magnus starts talking in hushed tones. They’re so close Alec can feel his breath ghost against his flushed cheek. “I think Lorenzo Rey is quite taken by your friend over there.”</p><p>He twirls Alec far too casually for someone as tall as Alec is, and pulls him back in in a way so that he gets a clear view of Lorenzo and Andrew at their dinner table. The two are sitting close and it looks like Andrew has a hand on Lorenzo’s forearm. There’s a gentle twinkle in Lorenzo’s eyes as Andrew tilts his head back in a laugh.</p><p>“My mother was hoping he and I would hit it off,” Alec laughs at the thought now, especially when he sees Magnus’ eyebrows pop up in surprise.</p><p>“Well that’s… unexpected in so many ways. Lorenzo’s firm is headquartered in Cambridge, so we run in some of the same social circles. I have to say, I don’t think I would’ve picked him for you.” He grins up at Alec, and Alec returns a goofy smile of his own.</p><p>“Yeah, I wouldn’t have picked him for me either.” As they sway to the music, Magnus inches closer. Alec can feel the heat of his body, close to flush against him and his heart stutters. He wonders if it’ll be so bad to allow himself this moment. It’s been a while since Alec’s had someone to share a dance with; perhaps the first time he’s ever actually <em> enjoyed </em> sharing a dance with someone. He leans in a bit, their foreheads almost touching. For a moment, he thinks he hears a hitch in Magnus’ breath.</p><p>“I thought you were avoiding me, after the last time we talked…” Magnus whispers against his ears.</p><p>Alec blushes, “I… I’ve been busy with work.” He tries to look away, but the Magnus’ eyes catch him again, and it’s as if he’s transfixed under his spell.</p><p>“Ah, yes. Lightwood &amp; Associates.” He masks it well, but Alec can hear the bitterness in the tone and it makes him bristle.</p><p>“...and also Izzy’s been hanging out with that guy she met at the club that night,” Alec adds. He’s baiting him, perhaps, trying to see how Magnus might react. He feels the hand on his waist flex, and the smile on the man’s face falters. Slowly, his mouth pulls into a thin line, and Alec immediately misses the warmth in the other man’s demeanor.</p><p>“Victor Aldertree.” Hatred weighs heavily on Magnus’ voice.</p><p>“Yeah, he said you knew each other.”</p><p>“...once upon a time, yes.” Magnus peers up at him with narrowed eyes, brows knit together. “Alexander, I don’t know what sort of tales that man may have told you,”</p><p>“He’s told me enough,” interjects Alec. He watches Magnus’ throat bob uncomfortably.</p><p>“Well… I wouldn’t believe everything I hear. And I would especially warn you against believing what you hear from Victor. He has reason to hate me.”</p><p>Magnus leads Alec into another twirl. It lands in the same expert manner, but it doesn’t have the playfulness from earlier.</p><p>“Understandably so,” he frowns when he’s back in Magnus’ hold.</p><p>“Excuse me?” Alec can hear the other man try to temper the agitation in his tone, but it’s there. Perhaps this is where he should pull back - had he not decided to stay out of Magnus’ business? But his meddling subconscious goads him on.</p><p>“From what he’s told me, he has a valid reason to.”</p><p>Magnus halts, and Alec wobbles at the sudden stop. The couple dancing next to them bumps into them and gives them a irked look. Magnus mutters a soft apology before he starts moving again. His eyes are anything but warm, now. Alec sees glimmers of anger, frustration, resentment… pain? And it all mixes into a dull glint that glowers back at him - guarded. He can’t shake the guilt that starts to build - Magnus was reaching out, trying to make amends and Alec just threw it all back in his face. But if there was any truth in what Victor had said, Alec knows he’s better off pushing the man away before his feelings (<em> feelings </em>?) get any stronger. If they’re all lies, then Magnus can deny it for himself.</p><p>For a while, the two don’t speak.</p><p>“I refuse to discuss my relationship with Victor Aldertree,” Magnus finally says. His voice is apathetic and cold. “But if that’s what you think of me, then I guess we have little more to talk about.”</p><p>Alec supposes that answers his question. Magnus doesn’t even care to deny it. He ducks his head and resumes their tense silence. Still moving in perfect synchronicity with the man who now feels so far away, their feet matching the four-count of the music as they go.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Maybe our boys need to use their words.<br/>I hope you enjoyed this week’s chapter! If you feel so inclined, I always appreciate comments/kudos! Thank you always for reading :) </p><p>tsujiharu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. All Good Things</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“Mom.”<br/>His mother doesn’t wait for an invitation and barges in as soon as the door opens, stomping through the entryway into the living room.<br/>“Do you care to explain why you were photographed dancing cheek-to-cheek with Magnus Bane, of all people?” She seethes.<br/>Photographers. Shit. Why didn’t he think his mother would check the photos from the event? Of course she checked the photos from the event. </p><p>***</p><p>The day after the gala.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I loved all the “USE YOUR WORDS” comments. FULL AGREE. It’s going to take a bit longer before they learn their lesson, but things have to get a bit worse before they get better… So, sorry in advance!<br/>There’s some dialogue lifted from the show in this chapter; an appreciation for my favorite Clace scene in the show :)</p><p>I hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alec wakes up to a loud, relentless knocking at his door. He wonders if it might go away if he ignores it long enough, but the persistent <em> knock knock</em>s (which are starting to sound more like <em> bang bang</em>s) just keep going. He secretly hopes that Jace will get up and answer, but he knows better, so he drags himself out of bed with a groan and trudges to the front door.</p><p>He immediately wishes he just stayed in bed.</p><p>“Mom.”</p><p>His mother doesn’t wait for an invitation and barges in as soon as the door opens, stomping through the entryway into the living room.</p><p>“Do you care to explain why you were photographed dancing cheek-to-cheek with <em> Magnus Bane</em>, of all people?” She seethes.</p><p>Photographers. Shit. Why didn’t he think his mother would check the photos from the event? <em> Of course </em>she checked the photos from the event. </p><p>“Good morning to you as well, Mother,” Alec mutters under his breath as he slowly closes the front door, trying to buy himself the smallest amount of time before answering her question.</p><p>“Magnus Bane, Alec?” Now she just sounds disappointed, and Alec feels the faint twinges of an oncoming headache. “I thought I made my expectations clear. Loren-”</p><p>“Lorenzo -” Alec doesn’t give her a chance to finish, “- was enjoying himself just fine without me, and Magnus and I… we, that was just a dance between -” he falters, struggling to find a word that describes his relationship with the man. Friends, sounds too familiar. Acquaintances? The dance felt more intimate than that. “...it was just a dance.”</p><p>Maryse looks dissatisfied at the response. Lips pursed and a crease forming between her brows.</p><p>“Besides,” he continues, voice rising again, “what’s your problem with Magnus anyway?”</p><p>“Have you seen him?” She scoffs, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world, and Alec feels the familiar knots form in his stomach.</p><p>“Seen what, Mother?” He folds his arms across his chest defensively, as if his arms will stop the ice spreading fast through his chest. “Do you… do you have a problem with his sexuality?”</p><p>Maryse’s head whips up to look at her son.  “No! Alexander, I’m offended that you would ever accuse me of that!” She does sound affronted, and Alec almost sags in relief. “But he doesn’t have to go flaunt it like that,”</p><p>The sigh he was about to release catches in his throat. He should be used to this by now; the disappointment, the surface level acceptance that he mistakes for something more genuine, being unceremoniously swept away by one cruel, careless thought. But the truth is, it’ll never not hurt hearing his parents be so dismissive of sexuality and the stereotypes they associate with them. He steels himself, standing up straight. He releases a long, controlled exhale before looking Maryse straight in her eyes.</p><p>“I need you to leave.”</p><p>“Alec,”</p><p>“No. I need you to get out,” he repeats emphatically, motioning to the front door. He keeps his expression neutral, if not stony. Maryse lets out a soft noise, like she’s the one that’s been wounded. For a split moment, he sees her eyes flicker with uncertainty, but Alec isn’t in the mood for apologies. Lucky for him, he doesn’t need to worry because he doesn’t get one. His mother silently turns on her heels and storms out of the condo, slamming the door behind her.</p><p>Alec’s shoulders slump as soon as she leaves. Suddenly overcome with exhaustion, he makes his way to the couch and collapses onto it, cradling his face in his hands with his elbows digging into his thighs. A mild panic bubbles in his chest as he counts his shaky breaths, trying to contain his turmoil. The queasiness has been growing since the end of last night, after Alec and Magnus parted after their dance with barely a terse goodbye. Alec wonders if it was wrong of him to bring up Victor Aldertree’s accusations, but he needed to know, and Magnus didn’t deny any wrongdoing.</p><p><em> You didn’t give him a chance </em> - a traitorous voice inside his head accuses. But Magnus could’ve said something, right? He had a chance to explain his side of the story if he had wanted to. Why didn’t he? The thoughts all morph into a dark, shameful, spiral that plagues Alec’s brain. He rubs his eyes with the palms of his hands and groans. More than anything, Alec wishes he didn’t care so much about the mysterious, magnetic man. Why should he care so much?</p><p>A rustle behind him makes Alec jerk up, turning around to find his brother watching him apprehensively from the hall. Jace looks concerned - he knows what Alec’s breathing exercises mean, even when Alec does everything he can to hide it. He doesn’t comment, though, instead walking into the kitchen and busying himself with the coffee maker.</p><p>“I’m sorry if I woke you,” Alec calls out.</p><p>“Was that Mom?” Jace raises his voice a bit to keep talking, “What did she want?”</p><p>“She saw a photo of me dancing with… Magnus. Wanted to know why it wasn’t Lorenzo,” replies Alec, joining Jace in the kitchen. The words drip with cynicism, as if he can’t believe his mother’s investment in his love life, which, to be fair, sometimes he still can’t. Jace just hums from the kitchen, as if he has more to say but is biting his tongue. It raises suspicion in Alec, who narrows his eyes at his brother. “What?”</p><p>The blonde shakes his head, “nothing. Lorenzo seemed preoccupied with Andrew, though,” he smirks. The comment elicits a huff of laughter.</p><p>“They were all over each other. I think Lorenzo forgot I even existed,” he snickers. “Speaking of, Andrew’s coming over with some breakfast in a bit, so make extra coffee.”</p><p>Jace nods and adds a few more spoonfuls of coffee grounds to the machine. The topic of his friend reminds Alec of the conversation they had the evening before. He studies his brother as he moves through the kitchen, grabbing the water pitcher and preparing his coffee with practiced movements. He seems tired, having been woken up by Alec and Maryse’s fight, but Alec also notes the happiness. The lightness in his mood, something Alec hasn’t often seen in his brother. He’s about to ask him about Clary - if he’s planning on making a move, when Jace beats him to it.</p><p>“I think I’m going to ask Clary if she wants to make things official,” he blurts out. There’s nothing suave about the delivery, the uncomfortable tone unthinkable from the Jace Lightwood who’s known for breaking hearts with callous ease. The awkwardness actually softens Alec, who tilts his head at his brother with a smile on his face.</p><p>“Oh? I’m actually surprised it took you so long,” he laughs. Jace glares at him, but there’s no heat behind it. “What was the deciding factor?”</p><p>“I dunno… it sounds so cliche, but she’s just special, you know?” A far-away look overtakes his brother’s face. His eyes seem to look beyond Alec, dazed over like he’s deep in thought. “It’s everything about her. Like, how she scrunches her face when she’s thinking. Or how she double-knots her shoes… like how she always has a piece of charcoal in her pocket.” A hesitant smile spreads over his face, shy, but beaming. “But it’s more than that. It’s how she always sees the best in people. In me. And I guess I was scared that if we took things too quickly, she was going to see something in me she doesn’t like. And I didn’t want to ruin this.”</p><p>Jace concludes, thoughtfully picking his words and expressing his feelings for Clary with what Alec could only call reverence. He feels a sting of heat behind his eyes, and he clears his throat to cover up the emotion that threatens to overflow.</p><p>“I think you should be telling <em> her </em> that. Not me,” he chuckles feebly. It’s all he can manage. Jace points a sheepish grin back at him, his focus back in the present. He playfully slaps Alec across the shoulder with a muttered <em> shut up, dude </em> and turns back to the coffee. It’s a relief to see Jace so content like this, but Alec also can’t deny he feels a small tug of jealousy, wondering if there could be a similar love himself. It’s easy to bury the negative feelings, though, when his brother is so obviously happy. So Alec and Jace spend the rest of the time waiting for Andrew bantering about life, Clary, and the gala.</p><p>Alec’s just catching Jace up about what Victor said about Magnus and Magnus’ subsequent reaction to it when Andrew rings the intercom. He buzzes him in and goes straight back to the story.</p><p>“So you’re telling me that you don’t know what actually happened?” Jace cocks his head to the side, sounding skeptical. His arms are crossed and he leans back on the counter with a small <em> hmph</em>.</p><p>“I only know Aldertree’s side of the story,” Alec nods, “but come on, Jace. I don’t think Aldertree would lie about <em> having </em> a record.”</p><p>Jace shrugs. “I just don’t think Magnus is capable of that type of viciousness…” He picks his coffee back up and takes a sip, peering up at Alec over the rim of his mug. “Want me to ask Clary?”</p><p>“No!” Alec balks at the idea a little too quickly, but the last thing he wants is for Magnus to think he’s snooping around for his background. “I mean, Magnus could’ve easily clarified yesterday and he chose not to. Seems shady to me.”</p><p>The front door opens as his brother mutters a small <em> I dunno</em>, and Andrew (along with the heavenly smell of breakfast burritos from their favorite place down the street) enters the room.</p><p>“What are we talking about?” He doesn’t even look up or say hi as he readily starts spreading out the food. He’s done this enough times to know his way around the brothers’ kitchen.</p><p>“Gossiping about Magnus.” Jace replies with a shit-eating smirk that makes Alec want to smack him.</p><p>“Ooh, Alec’s crush?” Alec doesn’t think he can get any redder; he’s suddenly regretting his decision to tell Jace about Victor and Magnus’ history. Andrew, however, just laughs fondly at his friend’s embarrassment.</p><p>“So is now a safe time to tell you that I scored a date with Lorenzo?” He asks casually as he takes his jacket off. Alec groans.</p><p>“Only if you’re the one to tell my mother about it.”</p><p>“I’ll pass,” snorts Andrew.</p><p>“I can’t believe you’re going on a date with Lorenzo Rey.” Alec can’t help but look at his friend in mild horror. “That guy is ridiculous.” His friend just chuckles as he pours himself a cup of coffee.</p><p>“You just never gave him a chance. He isn’t all that bad when he stops trying so hard to impress you,” he explains with a sly smile, as if he’s telling a secret. He passes the burritos out to the  brothers.</p><p>For a while they eat in silence, the greasy food soaking up any alcohol that may remain in their empty stomachs. While the quiet is comfortable, Alec finds his mind running a mile a minute. He thinks about the evening before - the dance with Magnus, the tingly warmth he felt, the glimmer he saw in those eyes. He thinks of what Victor said, what Jace just said, and everything he’s seen of the confusing man. Admittedly he doesn’t have much to go off of, which makes trying to solve the puzzle that is Magnus Bane all the more frustrating.</p><p> </p><p>He’s deep in his thoughts when he hears a small gasp. Alec blinks up to see Jace staring at his phone wide-eyed.</p><p>“What happened?” The comfortable silence immediately sours, a nervous tension taking its place. Jace’s mismatched eyes are shaky, darting between Alec and the phone. His brows are knit close together in what looks like hurt. Alec’s out of his seat and rushing to his brother’s side before he knows it.</p><p>“What happened?” He asks again, hand resting on Jace’s shoulder.</p><p>“Clary,” he whimpers, lacking the unabashed adoration with which he usually utters the redhead’s name. It sounds nothing like the usual Jace. The tremble in his voice clenches Alec’s heart in a tight vise, “she’s… leaving.”</p><p>“Leaving?” Repeats Alec, his grip on his brother’s shoulder gets tighter.</p><p>Andrew chimes in from across the counter, looking just as confused as Alec is feeling. “What do you mean leaving?”</p><p>Jace slides his phone toward Andrew, “here, read it. I don’t mind,” he bites out bitterly. The shakiness is replaced by a deep, hardened growl. Anger, Alec recognizes. He looks at Andrew, nodding at his friend and wordlessly asking him to read the text.</p><p>Andrew looks uncertain as he picks up the phone, but relents.</p><p>“<em>Jace - I need to tell you that I decided not to attend Parsons in the fall, and I’ll be staying in LA. Now that I’ve made up my mind, there’s no point in me staying here any longer. I’m leaving New York today. We’ll be swinging by Boston to visit Simon for a bit. It’s been too long since I’ve seen him, and I couldn’t wait an extra day. </em></p><p><em> I wanted to thank you for the time we spent together. I had a wonderful time in New York thanks to you, but now that I’m leaving and don’t plan to return anytime soon, I think a clean break will be best for me. I wish you the best, Jace. I hope you find everything you’re looking for.</em>”</p><p>Once he finishes reading the text, Andrew lets out a long exhale. The room is filled with silence, only punctuated by Jace’s agitated huffs of breath.</p><p>“So yeah,” he grits out, “leaving. Like, gone. As in, done with New York. With me.” The words flow out of him in a rush and he jerks his shoulder away from Alec’s hand. He picks up the phone that Andrew placed back on the counter, turning to leave the kitchen.</p><p>“Jace,” Alec calls out after him, trying desperately to find the words to comfort his brother. “Something’s got to be up. I saw her yesterday. She didn’t look like someone who was ready to just end things…” He shakes his head, thinking of the gala, of the bright twinkle in Clary’s eyes every time she looked at Jace. So full of tenderness and what looked so much like love. The next image that jumps to his mind is dull, deep set eyes and a hollow scowl. “Jonathan,” he whispers.</p><p>“What?” Andrew’s the one who asks. Jace is still standing by the door, looking like he’s about to bolt out of the room. He’s worrying his bottom lip with his teeth and his breaths still come out irregular. His handsome features are contorted in something that keeps fluctuating between anger and pain.</p><p>“What if Jonathan convinced her to leave?” He tries again. “He’s never liked you, Jace! He never wanted to speak with anyone but Clary, he barely even spoke to Magnus… what if he managed to convince her that she’d be better off in LA?”</p><p>Jace looks skeptical, but his movements still. Alec can see his mind working, perhaps thinking through all of his interactions with the sullen man. It isn’t completely out of the realm of possibility. Jonathan truly seemed to hate everything about Jace; he clearly has an unhealthy attachment to his sister, who in turn has a soft spot for her only brother. Jonathan’s jealousy hasn’t necessarily been subtle.</p><p>“You should tell her, Jace,” Alec adds, more gentle this time, “what you were telling me earlier. She needs to know how you feel before she makes a decision.”</p><p>And that seems to do the trick. He can see Jace’s eyes waver for a moment, but quickly strengthening in resolve. He nods and fishes his phone back out of his pocket. He fidgets with it nervously, Alec can see the faint tremor in his hands, and brings the phone up to his ear. His other hand anxiously rubs at the back of his neck.</p><p>It only takes a second.</p><p>He blanches, eyes widening again in shock, lips pulling in a tight line. The tension that spreads in his body is immediate and it’s noticeable. His trembling hand holding his phone slowly lowers to his sides, and his devastation is clear in every movement he makes.</p><p>“She blocked me,” is all Jace manages to make out before turning out of the kitchen without another word, leaving Alec and Andrew speechless.</p><p>The slam of his bedroom door echoes through the apartment.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I promise we’re on our way to a happy ending…! They just need to go through some ish first.<br/>Next week - Magnus and Alec reunite! There’s a lot more fluff and we meet a couple of new characters ;)</p><p>As always, your comments make my day! So if you feel so inclined, please leave me a comment/kudos.</p><p>Until next week,<br/>tsujiharu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Rebirth</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>It’s only been a couple of months, but so much has changed.</p><p>“Come visit us, Alec,” Andrew smiles at him through the screen. “Take some time off - all you’ve done this summer is worry about Jace and Izzy. You deserve a break.” He charges on, ignoring Alec’s responding sigh, “I’m serious. Just some time to relax. You can visit your alma mater, we can go to a few parties… I won’t even force you to hang out with Lorenzo,” he adds with a chuckle.<br/>Alec rolls his eyes, but a smile is breaking through and they both know Andrew’s already won.</p><p>***</p><p>Alec takes a trip to Boston… and surprise, surprise, he runs into Magnus.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Friday!<br/>I’m back with a bit of a longer chapter this week! Malec reunite, and we’re introduced to a couple of new characters.<br/>As always, thank you so much for reading and for leaving comments/kudos. I love hearing your feedback and your theories! We ended on a bit of a low note last week and I know the boys have been a bit frustrating so far, but I hope this chapter provides a bit of respite. Our Clace sidestory has to be placed on hold for a second because ultimately this is a Malec fic… and we’ve got some quality Malec content this week ;)</p><p>I hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Spring passes them by in flurry, bringing the oppressive heat of New York summers and the droning screams of the cicadas. Even from the balcony of their Manhattan condo, Alec hears the rhythmic cries echo loudly, melding into the backdrop of the city sounds. He hears the front door open as he takes another sip of his coffee - Jace. Back from the prowl of the night before. He thinks of calling out to his brother and starts to walk back into the comfortably air-conditioned living room, but before he can even close the balcony window, he hears Jace’s bedroom door close. So he’s not in a mood to talk, Alec nods to himself and retreats to his own room, coffee in hand.</p><p> </p><p>A couple of months have passed since Clary, Jonathan, and Magnus left New York. Alec had heard rumors of Magnus being back in Brooklyn since then, but only for a day or two at a time, and strictly for work. Alec has not faced the man since confronting him the evening of the gala, which has been both a relief as well as a heavy weight on his heart. There was still a small part of him that hated parting on such tense terms with the man who Alec found both frustrating and so captivating.</p><p> </p><p>It’s only been a couple of months, but so much has changed.</p><p> </p><p>It’s been an unusually quiet summer at the condo. What was once a space where friends and family gathered for comfort has felt hollow and lonely over the last couple of months.</p><p>Jace is rarely home now, bouncing from one partner to another and coming back in the mornings. He quickly reverted back to his old ways, hiding his heartbreak behind his usual facade, overtly avoiding any mention of Clary and their spring fling (that felt far too real to be called a fling). Alec still struggles to wrap his mind around what had happened. The group departed the city in such a haste, and Clary choosing to flat-out block Jace’s number seems so out of character. The reality, however, was just that, and Jace didn’t waste time dwelling on the <em> why </em>. It pained Alec to see his brother like this, especially after seeing how close he was to getting everything he wanted. Jace, perhaps because of how he came to be adopted by the Lightwoods, has always struggled with fears of abandonment. The Lightwoods and Jace’s parents had been old family friends, and when a ten year-old Jace needed a home after his abusive father walked out on his family and his mother lost her fight to her own inner demons soon after, Maryse didn’t think twice before offering to take him in. The back-to-back loss of his parents scarred Jace in ways that Alec could never understand, and regardless of the Lightwoods’ efforts to convince him otherwise, it’s clear that Jace doesn’t believe he is worthy of lasting love. So he goes back to what he believes is expected of him. What he thinks he deserves. The thought makes Alec’s heart ache for his brother.</p><p>Now that her classes were done for the summer, Izzy was spending more and more time out. Alec barely sees her outside of their Sunday dinners anymore, and they don’t get a lot of time to catch up on those evenings. When he does see her, she seems tired. There are days where he notices dark circles under her eyes, a worrisome pallor to her skin. If Alec tries to bring it up, she claims her summer internship has been taxing, but Alec can’t help but wonder if all her nights out, and what those evenings entail, might be taking a toll. He’s learned the hard way that any show of concern is unwelcome; his sister dismissing him with a scoff, brushing him off, and pulling away even further. He misses their casual closeness - Izzy stopping by the condo “just because”, and teasing Alec for being so uptight. These days, there are times he feels like he doesn’t even recognize his sister.</p><p>In yet another surprising turn of events, it was late in the spring when Andrew made the decision to leave New York. Much to Maryse’s dismay, his relationship with Lorenzo progressed fast. The two were practically inseparable while Lorenzo was in the city working the Baybrook case with Alec. Once the case was over (with another win under the sleazy belt of corporate America) and the lawyer was headed back to Cambridge, Andrew decided to join him. Alec can still remember the shock he felt the moment Andrew broke the news (“<em>I just thought why not? </em>” He shrugged. Alec could have easily given him at least 50 reasons why not, but his friend was not interested). So once he found an apartment in Massachusetts, he packed up his belongings and left with little fanfare. They’ve facetimed a few times since, and it sounds like things are going smoothly for the couple. At this rate, it shouldn’t surprise Alec if the two decided to move in together within the year (thought it probably will still surprise him - his best friend! With Lorenzo Rey!!).</p><p>“Come visit us, Alec,” Andrew smiles at him through the screen. “Take some time off - all you’ve done this summer is worry about Jace and Izzy. You deserve a break.” He charges on, ignoring Alec’s responding sigh, “I’m serious. Just some time to relax. You can visit your alma mater, we can go to a few parties… I won’t even force you to hang out with Lorenzo,” he adds with a chuckle.</p><p>Alec rolls his eyes, but a smile is breaking through and they both know Andrew’s already won.</p><p> </p><p>****************</p><p> </p><p>It’s easy enough to get the time off; Alec has never requested vacation aside from a day here and there for personal days, and with tensions between him and Maryse steadily increasing to an all-time high since the gala in the spring, she doesn’t hesitate to approve his request. A week later, Alec finds himself on a flight up to Logan International Airport, feeling lighter than he had all summer, excited to see his friend.</p><p>Andrew lives in a charming brownstone in Boston. After a warm embrace, he leads Alec to the guest bedroom to get settled. It isn’t a large room, but it’s cozy with a wide window overlooking the small residential streets outside that provides plenty of natural sunlight. He hauls his carry-on suitcase onto the chest at the foot of the bed, and starts digging around for a change of clothing so he can wash off some of the stale airport air before the two leave for a night out in the town. He takes a quick shower and changes into a simple outfit; dark wash jeans and a black t-shirt (Izzy would be appalled). He thinks the look should suffice for a casual night out. The idea of a simple evening of catching up with his friend over a couple of beers has him excitedly taming his unruly hair that’s decided to curl in every which way at the front. When he finally gets it settled, he steps out of the bathroom only to be surprised by a thunderous greeting.</p><p>“Mr. Lightwood!!!”</p><p>Alec startles, freezing where he stands with his hand still wrapped around the doorknob as Lorenzo Rey charges toward him with a wide grin that Alec 100% does not trust no matter what Andrew says. His friend in question is watching this all go down from over his boyfriend’s shoulder with an apologetic smile on his face.</p><p>“...Lorenzo,” Alec greets with a small nod and a disapproving glance toward his friend that can’t be contained. “Andrew didn’t mention that you’d be joining us tonight. To what do we owe the pleasure?”</p><p>Lorenzo doesn’t seem to notice Alec’s annoyance, or if he does, he simply charges on without a care.</p><p>“Ah, yes! I was just about to tell my darling Andrew -” he looks back at the other man with such fondness in his eyes, it almost makes Alec feel bad for being so harsh. His adoration for Andrew is obvious, and he clearly treats him well. “- that I snagged a last-minute invitation to a party hosted by <em> the </em>Camille Belcourt!”</p><p>By the way Andrew’s eyebrows dart up, Alec can tell this is a big deal. He chimes in helpfully, “The Belcourts are basically New England royalty. Camille is the heiress to the estate, basically in charge of it already in her father’s old age. She hosts these events every so often; anyone worth knowing is bound to be there.”</p><p>“Andrew could tell you that I’ve been trying to get an invitation to one of her soirees for <em> months </em> now! It’s been over a year since I’ve been to an event hosted by her!” Lorenzo’s eyes gleam as he continues, his hands wave excitedly with every word. Alec nods slowly as he processes each new piece of information.</p><p>“That’s… great, then. Congratulations, Lorenzo,” he gives the man a small smile, still uncertain what direction the conversation will head next.</p><p>“Thank you, thank you! It took a little bit of social tact, but I pride myself in my ability to charm when the situation calls for it…” Alec is rolling his eyes over to Andrew as Lorenzo babbles on about his “charm” and “social tact”, so he almost misses when Lorenzo tacs on an important detail at the end.</p><p>“I’m sorry, what was that?” He asks.</p><p>“The event is tonight,” repeats Lorenzo, with a smile that indicates he doesn’t realize he’s about to ruin the quiet night that Alec had envisioned. “Don’t worry, my friend! I knew you would be here, so I managed to get three invitations. Just wear whatever you brought that’s best!”</p><p>With that, Lorenzo winks at Alec, spins dramatically on the spot, and starts to head back toward the entrance of the apartment, muttering something about preparations as he goes. He kisses Andrew on the cheek as he walks by the taller man, and rushes out the door, leaving two speechless men in his wake. The two stand rooted in their spots as the dust settles. Alec is the first to break the silence.</p><p>“So… I guess no on the quiet-night-just-the-two-of-us-you-won’t-even-need-to-see-Lorenzo thing?”</p><p>Andrew laughs airily, even though he’s probably got every right to be offended with Alec being anything but polite about his boyfriend since they’ve met. “Be nice. You just need to get to know him, Mr. High-and-Mighty.”</p><p>Alec narrows his eyes, skeptical, but nods, “he does seem a bit less… sleazy.”</p><p>“That’s a start,” snorts Andrew. “Alec… we don’t <em> have </em> to go.” Alec can hear the clear <em> but </em> that’s about to follow. It comes after only a moment of hesitation, “but Lorenzo wasn’t kidding when he said he’s been angling for an invite for a while, and… he doesn’t show it, but he’s nervous. He knows he doesn’t always make the best first impressions when trying to make business connections, and I know it would help for me to be there for him. I’m so sorry, Alec - could we do our quiet evening tomorrow?”</p><p>Andrew stares up at him with puppy-dog eyes, and Alec knows there’s no use arguing. His friend rarely ever asks him for anything, and considering all the times Alec’s dragged Andrew out to act as a social cushion for his anxious, disastrous self, it’s really the least he could do.</p><p>“Fine, but you owe me,” Alec says sternly, but Andrew knows him well enough to know there’s no real heat behind his words.</p><p>“Thank you, Alec.” Andrew beams, “and don’t worry, from everything I’ve heard, Camille Belcourt throws the best parties.”</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p><p>****************</p><p> </p><p>Even as someone who isn’t keen on socialite parties, Alec has to admit that Camille Belcourt’s event is impressive. He lags a few steps behind Andrew and Lorenzo and takes in the lavish decorations. He didn’t realize that the event was going to be held at the Belcourt’s mansion, which in itself is worthy of high praise. It’s an old brick building with white trimming details, secluded behind a small forest of trees just a short drive from the city. Alec imagines the property would be beautiful in the fall when the leaves change and paint the scene in warm yellows and reds. Impeccably polished black cars are dropping guests off at the roundabout, which leads to a gentle but long flight of stairs draped with a red carpet. A handful of photographers line the sides of the stairs that cut through a lush garden; between the bright flashes of cameras, Alec can make out the stark white lilies, jumping out in the beds of dark green. Further down, he can see an outdoor area set up for the party in what looks like a courtyard beyond an annexed wing of the house. The three pose for the cameras as they make their way up the stairs (Alec is relieved he thought to pack a suit just in case), and finally arrive at the entryway, aligned by tall marble pillars and dramatic French doors with colorful stained glass embellishing the top of the windows. Alec draws in a shaky breath at the extravagant show of wealth. The Belcourts are clearly not a family to be trifled with.</p><p>“Alec, over here,” Andrew pulls him back to reality with a gentle nudge at the elbow. It seems they’re being led down the foyer to where the party is. The hallway is ornamented with large flower arrangements featuring the same white lilies he saw in the garden earlier. They pop against the dark wood of the walls. Alec wonders distantly if the flowers all come from the gardens on the property. It wouldn’t be surprising. Lorenzo spends the entire length of the hallway whispering his comments on the worth of the artwork and the quality of the house features, Andrew nodding along indulgently. Alec opens his mouth to comment that it doesn’t seem like an appropriate topic right as they’re directed into the ballroom, when the words die at the tip of his tongue.</p><p>Magnus Bane stands in front of him, looking at him with just as much surprise as Alec feels inside.</p><p>“Alexander,” Magnus’ voice comes out strangled (or perhaps Alec just imagines that), but it’s still enough to punch the air out of Alec’s lungs. He isn’t sure if he’ll ever understand the power this man has over him.</p><p>“...Magnus,” he gives a perfunctory reply, suppressing the sudden wave of emotions that assault him.</p><p>“Magnus Bane, what a delightful surprise!” Lorenzo, thankfully, doesn’t seem to catch on to the crackling tension, and greets the man with a wide, narrow-eyed smile, “ah, and I see you brought Ragnor! It’s good to see you as well, dear friend.”</p><p>Alec finally turns to see a slim man with wavy salt and pepper hair that gives him a distinguished look. He’s a few inches shorter than Alec, but his perfect posture has him looming tall. He gives a tired glance to Lorenzo and nods, merely sighing his name in greeting.</p><p>Andrew walks up from behind them; knowing their entire history, if he has any concern for Alec and Magnus being at the party together he doesn’t show it.</p><p>“Andrew,” Magnus’ smile is genuinely warm this time, “I heard you had moved up to our neck of the woods. Lorenzo is a lucky man.”</p><p>“Indeed I am,” Lorenzo gushes - to his credit, he never misses an opportunity to fawn over Andrew. Alec’s disdain for the man thaws away bit by bit every time he sees Andrew beam in response.</p><p>“...and what brings you here, Alexander?” Magnus turns his attention back to Alec, his tone gentle, bordering on hesitant.</p><p>“I’m visiting Andrew for the week. It’s been a while since I’ve been in the area, and I managed to get some time off.”</p><p>Magnus is nodding as he listens to Alec rumble in reply, when his friend pointedly clears his throat.</p><p>“Oh, of course. This is my good friend, Ragnor Fell. Ragnor is the head of the English Department at Harvard. Ragnor, meet Andrew Underhill and Alexander Lightwood. We spent some time together while I was in New York in the spring,” he introduces the group with a flourish of his wrist, which smoothly transitions over to grab a champagne flute from a passing server’s tray. Alec’s eyes follow his hands as Magnus brings the glass to his glossy lips, then trace the bob of his throat as he takes a large swig of the bubbly drink, mesmerized by each movement. It takes his friend’s hand on his shoulder for him to jolt out of his reverie. Alec can feel the flush creep up the back of his neck as he looks back to Andrew, who just looks at him with a sympathetic grimace, the wordless <em> are you okay? </em>lingering in the air. He gives a terse nod, hoping that it sends the message.</p><p>“Well excuse us gentlemen, we’ve just arrived and must still make our rounds!” Lorenzo is the one who saves them from the building tension, eagerly dragging Andrew and Alec to another side of the room. The men barely have time to say goodbye, but Alec thinks it may be all for the best.</p><p> </p><p>The evening drags on. The food is good and there are plenty of drinks to keep the party going, but Alec would be lying if he said he wasn’t feeling out of place with Andrew playing the role of doting boyfriend for the night. After being paraded around by Lorenzo for some time, he excused himself for some fresh air, which is how Alec finds himself in the courtyard that he glimpsed from the red carpet when they arrived. Humidity still lingers in the air, but it’s a lot more tolerable now that the sun has set. The area is a lot quieter than inside; it doesn’t seem like many guests have ventured out far enough to find the small oasis. Alec settles on a wooden bench, champagne in hand, and takes in his surroundings. Several silver canopies are set up throughout the courtyard, which features a beautiful fountain in the middle of it. Fairy lights hang between the trees, the canopies, and the gazebo further down a small footpath, giving the whole area an ethereal feeling that brings a small smile to Alec’s face. This garden really does feel like an oasis compared to the busy indoors where many of the partygoers are clearly aiming to make professional and political connections. Alec takes a deep breath in, and basks in the subtle scent of summer flowers that bloom throughout the garden. He can still hear the beat of the music from inside the house, the melody almost drowned out by the constant flowing from the fountain. His foot taps along with it unconsciously. He feels the tension release from his shoulders with every breath he takes, the exhaustion from travel suddenly catching up with him with a vengeance. He lets his eyes flutter closed on his next deep breath. In his next inhale, the floral scent is suddenly stronger.</p><p>When he opens his eyes, Alec is greeted by a single white lily held out at eye-level in front of him. His eyes trace up the arm that holds the flower; a burgundy suit jacket, fitted perfectly around a toned body, shimmers under the fairy lights. He feels his breath hitch, barely needing any further confirmation. But his eyes keep traveling up until they meet warm brown framed by perfectly symmetrical wisps of eyeliner and a splash of glitter.</p><p>“Magnus,” Alec exhales, voice barely above a whisper. The edges of the man’s eyes crinkle, but Alec can sense he’s nervous.</p><p>“I was hoping,” he starts, pulling the lily back closer to him, as if he’s suddenly uncertain about the gesture. Alec only now realizes it may have been an offering to him - his gaze darts to Magnus’ hand that rolls the stem gently between his fingers. “I was hoping... that we could start over. I didn’t like the way we parted ways.” Magnus’ features twist in a grimace.</p><p>Without thinking, Alec reaches out for the flower, gingerly laying a finger on the petals. The man seems to put him in a daze anytime he’s nearby, and it’s starting to become an embarrassing pattern. Magnus’ eyes follow the movement of his fingers, mesmerized, and a warmth spreads in Alec’s chest. Maybe he isn’t the only one.</p><p>“Is this…?” He tilts his head.</p><p>“Oh, yes! I have to admit I just picked it from the garden. I didn’t expect to see you tonight, and so I didn’t really have anything planned…” Magnus seems flustered and Alec’s traitorous brain can’t help but find it adorable. He wishes he could hate the man, but there was something about him that he can’t help but be drawn to. “But white lilies... they represent <em> rebirth</em>. So, I thought it was appropriate, perhaps, to symbolize us starting our friendship from a clean slate?”</p><p>Alec looks up at Magnus from where he sits, regarding him with narrowed eyes. The man still looks nervous - his expression wavering between hopeful and embarrassed, and he gets the sense that those feelings are fairly foreign for Magnus. After a moment, he lets out a noncommittal hum, plucks the flower from Magnus’ hand, and scoots over on the bench. For a second Magnus looks at him speechless and wide-eyed, and Alec feels his stomach drop. Did he misread the situation? He’s ready to open his mouth or stand up and leave or do anything, when Magnus plops down next to him. Venturing tentatively into Alec’s personal space. Alec’s heart rate rises as the other man inches close enough that he can feel the warmth of his body, the spicy scent of his cologne tickling his nose. They’re close enough that their shoulders almost brush when Magnus turns toward him, regarding him with interest. The heady weight of his stare making Alec feel warm.</p><p>“For what it’s worth,” Alec averts his eyes, “I didn’t like how we left things either.”</p><p>He thinks he hears Magnus smile.</p><p>“I usually pride myself in being able to read others,” Magnus starts, a bit of an amused huff to his tone.</p><p>“Oh? I would have never guessed,” replies Alec dryly. He almost winces, regretting bringing up their horrible first impressions. Magnus apologized about that already, so there’s no need for Alec to rub it in. Thankfully, the other man seems unfazed.</p><p>Magnus looks at him with a softness in his eyes that Alec doesn’t even want to begin to interpret. “You seem to be the exception.”</p><p>He’s so close. Too close. <em> Not close enough</em>.</p><p>Alec can’t stop his eyes from glancing down at the other man’s mouth as he takes a sip of his drink. The tip of Magnus’ tongue darts out and catches a drop of alcohol that lingers on his lower lip. He doesn’t miss the small twitch of a smile, and his eyes snap back up. How many times does he need to be caught ogling this man’s features before he learns his lesson? Was it all on purpose? Is it possible that Magnus Bane, quite possibly the most attractive man Alec has ever met, was <em> flirting</em>? With <em> Alec</em>? His heart is pulled in opposite directions. One side reminding him that this man could be cruel, cold, calculating - the other reveling in the softness he’s shown Alec. He wonders, not for the first time, if it would be so bad to allow himself to hope, that perhaps this is the real Magnus Bane. That maybe he’s deemed Alec worthy of tenderness, friendship (and maybe something more?). Heat rises in Alec’s cheeks and he turns away.</p><p>“I’m not that interesting,” he mutters, hiding his face behind his own glass as he takes a large sip of his champagne.</p><p>Magnus chuckles, “I beg to differ. I find you very interesting.” He uncurls a ringed finger from around his glass to point at Alec. Alec gives him a sideways glance, one eyebrow raised. They sit in stillness for a moment, eyes set on each other. The silence is tense, but not uncomfortably so. It encourages Alec to scoot just a little closer. He leans on his free hand, placed inconspicuously between their bodies and his head tilts ever so slightly toward Magnus. They’re close enough that Alec can hear Magnus’ sharp inhale.</p><p>“Alexander-”</p><p>“Magnus, darling, there you are!” A shrill voice bursts through the bubble that surrounds the two men. “I’ve been looking for you all evening!”</p><p>Alec immediately straightens up, startled. His heart is racing as he takes another sip of his drink, failing at feigning nonchalance.</p><p>“Camille,” Magnus bites out, suddenly sounding miserable, “what a coincidence, I’ve been avoiding you all evening.” He adds with an exaggerated eye roll. </p><p>Camille. Alec recognizes the name as the hostess of the event. He looks over to the tall, slim woman who sauntered up to them, unnoticed. She’s beautiful - she’s wearing an emerald green halter neck dress, her dark hair bundled up in a gentle, elegant updo. Some loose strands flow down on her neck and bare shoulders. The jewels adorning her necklace and earrings shine as they catch the light, highlighting her sharp facial features, which are accented with a charcoal eye and wine red lips. Without question, she is beautiful, but Alec can’t shake the feeling that there’s a bitter edge to her narrowed eyes and curled mouth. She seems amused by Magnus’ malice, ignoring the harsh words when she replies,</p><p>“I was excited to hear you had accepted my invitation tonight,” she coos. Alec’s hackles rise at the nasal, sickly sweetness of her voice. He feels out of place, like he’s listening to a conversation clearly not meant for his ears. Like… a lover’s quarrel (at least from the way Camille addresses Magnus).</p><p>Magnus scoffs in response, “invitation? Threat is more like it. Why is it that every time I miss one of your parties, I have an angry investor who’s heard some unfounded rumor about me, hm?”</p><p>“Oh honey I’m sorry to hear that. I don’t know why you’d think I have anything to do with it,” she whines. Magnus lets out an exasperated sigh; clearly not interested in further engagement. Camille’s smile widens, but Alec notices that it doesn’t reach her eyes. Dull, dark eyes that now point to him.</p><p>“You…” she regards him with curiosity with a graceful cant to her neck, “where have I seen your face...”</p><p>Alec tenses under her scrutiny. But resists his urge to curl into himself. He keeps his back straight and his chin up, and looks the woman in her eyes. He sees the recognition when it comes to her.</p><p>“I saw you in a photo, with Magnus. From that one gala in the spring?” She’s pointing at him smile widening with each word. “You looked cozy,” she adds gleefully.</p><p>Alec senses Magnus bristle beside him. He wants to reach out, place his hand over Magnus’ and ask if he’s okay. But he won’t.</p><p>“Alec Lightwood,” he says, instead. He stands up and extends his hand. Camille’s eyes shoot down to his hand, but she makes no move to take it.</p><p>“Lightwood,” she repeats, as if she’s considering the name. Alec awkwardly rescinds his hand once he figures Camille has no care for formalities. She points between the two men. “You two looked so adorable in those photos, gooey-eyes and all…”</p><p>Alec feels the blush return to his face in a rush, but then Camille opens her mouth again, “moving on from me already, Magnus?”</p><p>So the impression he got wasn’t completely off.</p><p>“Camille,” Magnus grits out, as if in warning. Alec looks back down at the other man, who pins Camille in an icy glare; she continues unbothered.</p><p>“Isn’t Lightwood the name of those garbage lawyers who refused to take you as a client?” She grins, addressing Magnus but keeping her eyes trained on Alec. That causes Alec to pause; he never asked about Magnus’ history with his parents, and that - well that connects a few dots.</p><p>“Camille!” Magnus stands, his raised voice laced with anger. Alec notices that the few people who have wandered out to the courtyard are now openly staring at the three of them. Without sparing a second to think, he angles himself between the two.</p><p>“If you’d excuse us -” he offers their host a polite smile and makes a show of placing his empty champagne flute on a tray table by the bench. “Magnus and I were just about to head in for some more drinks. This is a lovely party, Camille. It was wonderful meeting you.” His words are diplomatic, delivered in a carefully even tone. He picks up his lily from the bench, and hovers his hand over Magnus’ lower back. “Shall we?”</p><p>Surprise passes through Magnus’ eyes, but it doesn’t last long. It morphs quickly into an appreciative smile, and he nods at Alec. He doesn’t say a word to Camille, who huffs indignantly as they pass her.</p><p>“Have your fun, boys,” she calls after them - her voice sickly sweet, “Magnus <em> always </em> comes back to me in the end.”</p><p><em> Don’t take the bait</em>, Alec thinks to himself, then glances down at Magnus, whose lips are pulled into a tight line. <em> Please don’t take the bait</em>. He thinks, now to Magnus.</p><p>“I’m fine, Alexander,” the man whispers without casting him a glance, as if he could hear his private thoughts. “Thank you.”</p><p>They walk side by side in silence. Alec’s hand still hovers defensively over Magnus’ lower back, fingers itching to bridge the gap and… <em> claim</em>.</p><p>“Alec!”</p><p>He snaps out of his thoughts when he hears Andrew’s voice. He drops his hand to his side (and resolutely avoids Magnus’ questioning glance at the movement). Andrew rushes up to them, Lorenzo a few feet behind.</p><p>“Where were you?” He sounds slightly worried, eyes wavering between the two men.</p><p>“Sorry, I ended up outside in the courtyard and Magnus -” he takes a peek back at the other man, unsure of how much to say.</p><p>“I apologize for stealing your friend, Andrew. If you can excuse me, I think it’s about time I go in search of mine.” Magnus gives another tight-lipped smile. “Alexander, it was a pleasure as always.”</p><p><em> As always</em>. He throws the words out so casually, as if they hadn’t spent the majority of the time since they’ve met misunderstanding each other. Even now, the story Victor had told looms over Alec’s mind, casting doubts against the Magnus that he’s seen. The Magnus who keeps trying to make amends. Who picked him a white lily, asking for a fresh slate. Magnus, who finds him <em> interesting</em>. The two contradictory Magnus Banes clash in his mind. He opens his mouth, another sharp retort at the tip of his tongue, defensiveness bubbling up to the surface. He thinks better of it this time.</p><p>“Thank you,” he says instead, subtly lifting the flower he couldn’t leave behind. Magnus’ smile slowly widens, eyes crinkling at the edges. The sincerity drags a mirroring smile from Alec.</p><p>“Well then,” Magnus mutters, “have a wonderful night, gentlemen. Until next time.” He spins with a flare and disappears into the crowd of people.</p><p>Alec finally releases a long breath he didn’t realize he was holding. Every encounter with Magnus Bane only leaves him even more confused than the time before. Not to mention he never seems to be able to follow his own advice to just stay away from the man (not that Magnus has made that easy for him). He’s stewing in his own thoughts when he feels a pair of eyes on him. He looks up to catch Andrew’s eyes briefly darting down to the white lily in his hand. A knowing grin spreads across his face.</p><p>“I don’t want to hear it,” mumbles Alec. But he can’t hide the quirk in his lips or the lightness in his steps. Or the way he holds the flower so gently, with the utmost care as if it were a prized treasure.</p><p>Andrew laughs. The sound gets drained in the noise of the crowd, voices blending into a single low, energetic buzz that doesn’t feel quite as overwhelming anymore.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Is this the first chapter that doesn’t end in angsty Alec? Haha<br/>I hope you enjoyed the chapter. A bit of a high before we hit the lowest point in the story… (sorry!)</p><p>Thank you so so SO much for reading! It’s kind of surreal for me that my little self-indulgent crack fic has an actual audience, and it truly does mean so much to me. It makes writing the story so much more rewarding to know that people are out there enjoying it. If you feel like leaving me a comment/kudos, I’d love to hear your thoughts!</p><p>Much love,<br/>tsujiharu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. The Price We Pay</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Alexander,</p><p>I would have sent an email, but considering the content, I felt a letter was warranted. It may be old fashioned, but my mother used to always say, “if your voice fails, put it on paper”. I hope this will finally provide an opportunity for honesty that we have been lacking throughout our acquaintanceship.<br/>After our conversation this morning, I can see that I have caused you and your family tremendous pain. It was never my intention, and I am sorry to have done so. While I can’t take away the pain I’ve caused, I wanted to explain my judgments and my actions. I understand if you could never forgive me, but I hope you can at least understand my motivations.</p><p>***</p><p>The reveal.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Friday! I’m going to be honest… this was a really tough one to write. Buckle up, everyone. It’s going to be a rough ride.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Even in the summer, the Harvard campus is thrumming with energy. A smattering of people laze around Harvard Yard, enjoying the sunny day and the vibrant greenery. Alec finds himself smiling; it’s been a couple of years since he’s returned to the campus and it’s just as beautiful as he remembers. Since Andrew had some work to do during the day, Alec made the short trip to Cambridge and spent the morning seeing if any of the Law faculty were around, catching a few who got stuck teaching summer courses. After doing his rounds, he decided to take advantage of the beautiful day, which is how he finds himself in the Yard. The park is lively, but not too crowded mid-morning, and he takes in the white noise of muted conversations that meld pleasantly with the sounds of birds and the rustling of trees. He finds an unoccupied bench and sits down, taking in the peacefulness of the day. It’s nice to have a moment to himself; he’s spent the last few days with Andrew, and while Andrew is one of the few people outside of his siblings that he’s able to spend a full week with, Alec finds himself enjoying the time alone where he isn’t needing to match anyone else’s schedule.</p><p>It also gives him a chance to think, which he’s barely had a chance to do until then, about his encounter with Magnus from Camille’s party. The white lily sits in a glass vase in Andrew’s guestroom, reminding him every day of that warm rush he felt that night.</p><p>
  <em> I thought it was appropriate, perhaps, to symbolize us starting our friendship from a clean slate? </em>
</p><p>Magnus’ words echo in his mind, the hopefulness in the statement, phrased like a question. Alec hasn’t contacted him since and, to his surprise, the admittance comes with a sense of embarrassment and longing. It’s gotten hard to ignore the fact that Alec is attracted to Magnus; his quick wit, his sense of humor, his dramatic flourish… he finds everything about the other man intriguing. But he can’t seem to let go of the niggling questions planted by their initial meeting and Victor’s words. He <em> wants </em> to get over it - at least he <em> thinks </em> he does. It dawns on Alec that he hasn’t openly asked Magnus about Victor or about his experience with Alec’s parents. So perhaps it is his pride, which keeps him from fully exonerating Magnus from his perceived wrongdoings. He’s deep in thought when he notices a man hovering in his peripheral vision.</p><p>“Mr. Lightwood, I thought that might have been you.”</p><p>The man - Ragnor Fell - greets him warmly, a lot warmer than Alec would’ve expected from someone he met so briefly at a party. His posh British accent gives him an air of authority. Alec mainly remembers him because of his affiliation with the school (maybe also because it was Magnus who introduced them… but he doesn’t dwell on that thought), and he realizes he’s right by the English Lit department.</p><p>“Dr. Fell. It’s nice to see you again.” Alec smiles back. He barely spoke to the man at the party, but something about his stoic, yet open demeanor puts Alec at ease.</p><p>“You as well. I’ve heard so much about you from Magnus, I was hoping we would have another chance to speak.” Alec freezes at the words, and it must have been obvious because Ragnor hastily adds, “all good things, I assure you. Do you mind if I sit?” He gestures to the open space next to Alec.</p><p>The corners of Alec’s mouth lifts in an attempt to smile, but he’s sure it comes out as a grimace, “somehow I have a hard time believing that.” He scoots over a little in invitation, which Ragnor takes with a small “thank you.”</p><p>“Magnus can be a little stubborn if he feels he’s been wronged,” Ragnor laughs, “but you seemed to have left quite the impression on him.”</p><p>Alec isn’t sure what to make of that, so he remains silent as a flush creeps up the back of his neck. At least whatever pull he’s been feeling toward the man seems to be mutual; the newfound knowledge brings just as much relief as it does an uncomfortable flurry of emotions. Neither of which Alec knows what to do with.</p><p>“I believe you’re a good influence on him. It takes a lot for him to admit his errors, and it pains me to see him misunderstood.”</p><p>“Misunderstood?”</p><p>Ragnor nods. “He can come across aloof and unsympathetic, especially when he thinks the other deserves it. From what he’s told me you’ve been on the receiving end of this.”</p><p>Alec frowns, thinking back to the first few weeks after meeting Magnus, but he doesn’t say anything.</p><p>The professor smiles apologetically, as if he himself had been the one who cast judgment on Alec. He continues, his tone soft and thoughtful, “that sort of behavior can lead to people saying what they want… when in truth, Magnus is one of the kindest, most loyal men I’ve ever known.”</p><p>“You speak very highly of him,” Alec muses.</p><p>“He’s one of my oldest friends. We’ve been through a lot together, he and I.” A faraway daze crosses over Ragnor’s features; lips curled up like he’s remembering something especially amusing. Alec almost asks, but bites his tongue. Ragnor quickly snaps back to the present, chuckling as he does so, “regardless, you won’t find a more loyal man once you gain his friendship.”</p><p>Alec nods, but doesn’t respond. He listens to every word Ragnor shares, considering each one carefully like it’s the missing piece of the puzzle that’s finally going to help him solve the enigma that is Magnus Bane.</p><p>“If you met Magnus in New York, you must have met his friend, Clary Morgenstern?”</p><p>The sudden shift catches Alec off guard, and he hopes it isn’t too obvious.</p><p>“I, Clary? Yes… I did. Why do you ask?”</p><p>“Well, as an example, Magnus was the one who convinced her to return to Los Angeles.”</p><p>The words feel like being doused by a bucket of ice.</p><p>“He did…?” He croaks out around the quickly forming lump in his throat. Ragnor casts a questioning glance his way, but keeps explaining, only hesitating for a moment.</p><p>“Ah, yes. I believe she was about to make a rash life decision based on a man she didn’t know so well. Magnus felt the man’s intentions were questionable, so he stepped in.”</p><p>It doesn’t take long at all to realize Ragnor has no idea that the “man with the questionable intentions” he’s referring to is Alec’s brother, so he knows there’s no reason for the man to be lying.</p><p><em> Questionable intentions</em>?</p><p>How <em> dare </em> Magnus question Jace’s intentions. The man barely <em> knew </em> Jace. Memories of Jace’s heartbroken face flash through Alec’s mind. The fall from the happiest he’s ever looked - the pain, anguish, and the devastation. Alec remembers how gutted he felt when he saw Jace revert back to his pre-Clary tendencies. The way he acted like he could never be anything more than a good lay for a night. The ice that settled deep in his gut slowly turns to searing anger.</p><p>“Speak of the devil,” Ragnor chuckles, and the sound jolts Alec back to reality. He looks up, and Magnus is standing there, watching them curiously. His dark eyes twinkle in the daylight, and Alec can see a hint of a smile on the man’s face.</p><p>The man is beautiful.</p><p>And in this moment, Alec hates him.</p><p>It’s all Alec can do, to contain the boiling rage that builds within him at the sight of the man who pulled the rug from under his brother’s hard-earned happiness. He stares at him as he saunters up to the two,</p><p>“When I thought I’d pay my friend a visit, I didn’t expect the pleasure to see you as well, Alexander,” Magnus greets them, and his voice is so warm. His eyes crinkle with fondness. If this were yesterday, if it were just 30 minutes ago, it would have been everything Alec longed for. Now, it makes Alec’s insides wither with guilt. How could he want this man? How could he have ever wanted him? Bile creeps up the back of his throat.</p><p>“We just happened to run into each other,” explains Ragnor. Alec stands abruptly, before the conversation can get any further.</p><p> “I should go. I have to meet Andrew. It was great seeing you again, Dr. Fell,” he says without making eye contact with either of the men, but he can feel their eyes on him.</p><p>“Actually, Alexander,” Magnus calls out in a rush, “could we have a moment to chat in private?”</p><p>It’s the last thing Alec wants. He wants to leave - to never have to face this man again.</p><p>“I have to -”</p><p>“It won’t take long… please?” The hopefulness in Magnus’ pleading voice is what gives Alec pause. He should just say no, but there’s still something about the man that reels him back in. He nods.</p><p> </p><p>They part with Ragnor after saying a quick goodbye and make their way toward Old Yard, finding a slightly secluded area behind a building. Magnus looks nervous, bringing a hand up to fidget with his ear cuff. If Alec had seen him before his conversation with Ragnor, he may have even found it endearing. Now, his guard is up. He brings his arms behind his back, widens his stance slightly, and straightens his back to a parade rest. Alec notes with wry satisfaction that it seems to make Magnus even more anxious judging by the way he chews on his lips.</p><p>“I… I don’t really know where to start. But considering we keep seeming to misunderstand each other, I feel it’s best if I just be honest.”</p><p>Alec narrows his eyes. “What do you mean?”</p><p>Magnus releases a cautious exhale and looks Alec straight in the eyes before he starts.</p><p>“Ever since I met you, I… I can’t seem to get you out of my mind. Even when I - when I assumed the worst and convinced myself I hated you. It’s as if you’ve unlocked something in me.”</p><p>Alec freezes, rooted in his spot. No, no, no… Warning signals blare in his head, telling him to retreat. This can’t be happening. Not right now, <em> not like this</em>.</p><p>“What are you talking about?” He hates how meek the words are. As though they’re escaping him against his will.</p><p>“I have feelings for you,” Magnus blurts out. It’s so unlike the usually suave man, that it seems to take them both in surprise. “I tried to talk myself out of it so many times. I’ve told myself it could never work, what, with your family and -”</p><p>“My family?” Alec’s hackles are raised in an instant, and suddenly the words that came before that seem meaningless now. He watches as Magnus’ eyes widen, the interruption was clearly unexpected.</p><p>“Well… your parents and I don’t have the best history,” he says carefully.</p><p>“And what about my siblings?” He brings his arms forward to and folds them across his chest.</p><p>Magnus blinks a few times, trying to process the question. Eventually, his eyes narrow, brows knotted in the center. “...what about your siblings?”</p><p>“What do you have to say about them?”</p><p>“...is this about Jace?”</p><p>“Did you convince Clary to leave New York? To leave Jace?”</p><p>He sees Magnus’ jaw clench and it’s more than enough confirmation for Alec.</p><p>"Jonathan suggested it… I merely didn't disagree. But… seeing that Clary is unlikely to take her brother's advice on anything, it may as well have been me."</p><p>“How dare you,” he grits out.</p><p>“I watched them closely, Alec. Jace… Jace wasn’t making a move, and his reputation does precede him.”</p><p>The words bring back Andrew’s comments from the evening of the gala. But Jace was going to talk to her. He just needed to talk to her.</p><p>Alec watches Magnus’ eyes shift, a flicker of what looks like guilt flashes through his face as he continues, “Clary has been disappointed enough by people feigning interest in her for her wealth, and given your mother’s reputation…”</p><p>“My mother?!” Alec can’t help but interrupt, “what does my <em> mother </em> have to do with Jace?”</p><p>Magnus sighs, “it doesn’t take much to see that aligning himself with a Morgenstern could be a… clever political move. It seemed clear he was stringing Clary along, while whisking other women away at galas for what… a quick fuck? And she was naive enough to fall for it. I did what I did to protect a friend!” Urgency threads through his tone as he gets to the end of his thought, his voice rising a little as it does. Alec is seething by the end of it, anger churning in his stomach at how <em> wrong </em> Magnus is. </p><p>“He hadn’t been with a single person since meeting Clary until she left! Whatever you think you saw at the gala, you’re wrong. Jace went to apologize to that girl for treating her poorly, he just chose not to do it in public.”</p><p>The information seems to stun Magnus into silence, face contorted, confused.</p><p>“But… he went straight back to picking up women basically as soon as Clary left,”</p><p>“Because that’s all he thinks he’s good for, Magnus!” The protectiveness Alec feels for Jace pushes him to raise his voice. “He wanted nothing more than to be with Clary, but he was scared because of the way people like you talk about him! I’m not saying he hasn’t earned his reputation, but when it comes to Clary, you’re wrong. You barely even know him. How <em> dare </em> you make those accusations in one breath and tell me you have feelings for me in another.”</p><p>“Alexander…” Magnus’ objection is weak, pleading. But Alec doesn’t want to hear any more excuses. He’s on a roll now and he wants answers.</p><p>“As long as we’re talking about siblings,” he interjects, “what about Izzy?”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>He trains an icy glare on the other man. Lips pulled down in a scowl.</p><p>“Do you judge her for her friendship with Aldertree?”</p><p>“I…” Seemingly nonplussed by the question, Magnus stammers, “Aldertree can be charming when he wants to be, but I suppose yes, she could have better judgement...”</p><p>Alec scoffs, “you? Talking about better judgment? That’s rich. So why? Is it because you’re too good for someone like Aldertree?”</p><p>He can see anger flash through Magnus’ eyes, his body tenses noticeably. “No! It’s because Aldertree is a liar and a conman!”</p><p>He can tell that the conversation is devolving, but Magnus’ agitation only succeeds in riling Alec up further.</p><p>“That isn’t the way he tells it! And I wouldn’t know about your side because you won’t tell me! And after all that, with how you feel about my family… you… you say you have <em> feelings for me</em>?” He can’t stop the high-pitched quiver in his voice. “After all you’ve done and all you’ve said, there is absolutely <em> no way </em> I could ever want to be with you…!”</p><p>They're both practically yelling now, both desperate to be heard but neither listening, and Alec notices they’re standing so much closer than when they began the conversation. They must have taken steps toward each other while venting their frustrations - now Magnus’ face feels like it’s only inches away. His eyes are right there in front of him. Still bright, possibly even more so than usual with fire. Alec blinks, the bubbling rage suddenly lowering to a simmer, and he sees Magnus’ eyes dart down to his lips. They linger there for a moment, and, without thought, the tip of Alec’s tongue darts out to wet his lips.</p><p>Along with a long, controlled exhale, Magnus squeezes his eyes shut. The crease between his brows deepen as he turns away.</p><p>“...I suppose you were the exception.” He says, deflated. As if he knows, as he says it, that it isn’t the right thing to say.</p><p>“An… exception? I’m still a Lightwood, Magnus… I always will be,” Alec replies softly, a bone-deep exhaustion seeping its way through his body.</p><p>“I… I’m so sorry. I had thought the feelings I felt so strongly were mutual… clearly, I was mistaken.” His voice is so soft, so pained, that Alec almost feels ashamed. But he can’t. He won’t. Because how could he see Magnus as anyone but the man who unjustly broke Jace’s heart? The man who judges people so swiftly, leaving little room for efforts and amends? Because how could Alec, who seems to be an exception to the rule, ever be with this man who looks down on his family? His family isn’t perfect, Alec knows they’ve made mistakes, but they’re still his family, and the animosity Magnus shows them rouses a jolt of anger in their defense.</p><p>When it’s clear Alec isn’t going to say anything else, Magnus nods. his eyes look dulled and hollow for the first time since Alec’s known him, and it’s heartbreaking. Alec looks away.</p><p>“Goodbye, Alexander.”</p><p>He stands there for a while, stubbornly keeping his eyes averted (too cowardly to face the pain he’s caused). When Alec finally looks back, the man is gone.</p><p> </p><p>***************</p><p> </p><p>Alec doesn’t remember how he gets back to Andrew’s apartment; the whole trip is a blurry haze. Andrew, forever the understanding friend, doesn’t pressure him to ask what’s wrong. He sees Alec in distress and gives him space instead. Alec feels a dash of guilt - he isn’t going to be in Boston much longer and he doesn’t want to ruin the final days of his trip, but his mind is in such a cluster that he can barely get a sentence out even to his best friend. So instead, he thanks his friend and retreats to his bedroom. He stands by the open window, listening to the sound of honking cars, of the wind rustling the leaves, and the never-ceasing cries of the summer cicadas. The sun heats his skin but does nothing to warm the emptiness he feels in his heart. His eyes dart to the flower he kept on the windowsill. The stark white lily, still in full bloom and bright in the sunshine brings none of the comfort it brought him in the morning. He can’t reconcile what he learned today with the Magnus that he saw in that courtyard at Camille’s party.</p><p> </p><p>Alec gets lost in his thoughts. He sees the sun move across the sky with glossed over eyes, thoughts of his siblings and parents running through his head. He tries to process what happened, but all he can feel is the sharp stab of disappointment and betrayal. He can’t stop thinking of Magnus, on his high horse, disparaging his family while spewing his affection toward Alec as if it should make him feel special.</p><p>
  <em> It’s as if you’ve unlocked something in me. </em>
</p><p>He hates Magnus for managing to get under his skin in such a short period of time. He hates Magnus for prying open his heart like this. But he hates himself even more for letting it happen. Every time he tried to tell himself to stay away, he found himself back in the man’s orbit, unable to resist the pull he felt toward him. He hates himself for falling for that glimmer of hope, letting himself long for a possibility. All it’s left him with is hollowness that won’t be filled with neither the anger nor the anguish he feels.</p><p>A knock on the door startles him out of his trance. He pinches the bridge of his nose, feeling the first hints of an oncoming headache. When he opens the bedroom door, Alec finds Andrew, looking uncharacteristically uneasy with a tense frown clouding his face.</p><p>“I wasn’t sure if you’d want to see this, but… he seemed desperate, and it seemed important.”</p><p>He holds out a letter, an honest-to-god handwritten letter, and Alec can’t bring himself to take it. He stares at it in Andrew’s hand for a second. A plain white envelope with his name written across it in neat, loopy handwriting. It’s his full first name, <em> Alexander</em>, because he never did get around to telling Magnus that he didn’t like it when people called him that (he didn’t want to admit that he liked the way the name sounded on Magnus’ tongue).</p><p>“Alec…” Andrew opens his mouth, but before he can say anything Alec extends a shaky hand and takes the letter. He holds it gently between his fingers, like it’s a delicate thing that might break if he grabs it too hard.</p><p>“Thank you, Andrew,” is all he can manage. His friend shoots him a weary smile, and turns to give Alec his privacy.</p><p>Alec closes the door again and moves to the bed. Something tells him he’ll want to be sitting for this. He slides a finger into the fold of the envelope, gingerly tearing it open. He takes a deep breath, readying himself for whatever Magnus may have to say to him, unsure of what to expect, and pulls out the two folded pages, both filled with the same loopy script across the pages.</p><p> </p><p>***************</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Alexander, </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I would have sent an email, but considering the content, I felt a letter was warranted. It may be old fashioned, but my mother used to always say, “if your voice fails, put it on paper”. I hope this will finally provide an opportunity for honesty that we have been lacking throughout our acquaintanceship. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> After our conversation this morning, I can see that I have caused you and your family tremendous pain. It was never my intention, and I am sorry to have done so. While I can’t take away the pain I’ve caused, I wanted to explain my judgments and my actions. I understand if you could never forgive me, but I hope you can at least understand my motivations. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> In the case of your brother, Jace. I admit that I may have acted hastily and harshly. Clary reminds me a lot of myself, growing up without wealth then suddenly finding herself in abundance. I’ve seen her experience heartbreak too many times because someone decided to take advantage of her generosity and kind heart. She tries so hard to see the good in people, and I allowed my cynicism to overrule my better judgement. I must also confess that I was the one who convinced Clary to cut Jace off entirely. Considering how deeply she felt for him, it seemed like the healthiest way for her to move on, rather than allow an opportunity for Jace to “sweet talk” his way back into her life. Again, I realize now that I have gravely misjudged your brother. For that, I am sorry. I know it doesn’t seem like a worthy excuse, seeing the amount of hurt I caused in both your brother and my friend, but I thought I was protecting her. I hope you can try to understand my wish to save a friend from heartbreak. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> As for Victor Aldertree, I should have been open with you from the beginning, but the story isn’t exactly mine to tell. Years ago, Victor Aldertree befriended Simon Lewis. I’ve known Simon since he was a teenager, and he is my family in all ways but blood. He met Aldertree during his second year at college; the changes were small at first. He started going out more, visiting me less, became withdrawn. I should have caught on earlier, but I was so exhausted at the time, just starting to find my footing for my business. To this day, it’s one of my biggest regrets that I wasn’t there for Simon sooner. By the time I figured out what was going on, Aldertree had him hooked on a drug called Yinfen. It got to the point where Simon came to me and told me everything, finally admitting that he had a problem. I don’t want to imagine how the situation could have been different if Simon didn’t have the bravery to ask for help. I got him checked into a program that night, and paid Aldertree a visit. I know what he says about me, but I hope you can trust me when I say that I had nothing to do with Aldertree’s arrest. I told him to stay away from Simon, and had hoped that the threat of calling the police would be enough. It seems like Aldertree was in the habit of making enemies. Someone else must have tipped off the police because he was arrested within a week. When he managed to weasel his way out of a sentence by making some deal, he came to see me, accusing me of calling the police on him. He called Simon a few choice names that I don’t care to ever repeat. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> This next part is something I’ve never admitted to anyone. I am ashamed to write it down, as it’s evidence of my youth, naivete, and arrogance in my newfound wealth - I threw money at the problem to make it go away. I agreed to pay him a sum of money as long as he agreed to leave the city and to never speak to Simon again. He kept up his side of his promise, Simon went through rehab and has been close to three years sober. Sobriety is a constant journey, and I couldn’t be prouder of him. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> That night, outside of Pandemonium, was the first time I had seen him since. I hoped, again, naively (and, as much as I hate to admit it, cowardly), that my association with you and your family would keep him away from you and your sister. I used that cowardice to justify not telling you all I know about him. That, and the fact that I didn’t want Simon to face any further scrutiny for the errors of his youth. It seems I let my pride get in the way, yet again, of what is right. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Alexander, I want to repeat that I don’t expect forgiveness from you. I also won’t repeat my sentiments from earlier, which were clearly unwelcome. I just needed you to know why I acted the way I did, because while I’ve made my fair share of mistakes, it pains me to know that you think I’ve made them without any reason but my poor judgement. It pains me to think you may return to New York with this impression of me. So I hope you allow me this one final selfish act of defending myself. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Yours, </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Magnus Bane </em>
</p><p> </p><p>***************</p><p> </p><p>Alec read the letter. </p><p>Then he read it again.</p><p>And again.</p><p>He keeps reading it until the sun sets low, the room dimming, and his eyes begin to strain as they trace the graceful handwriting over and over again. Isn’t it what he had asked for? To know what was going through the mind of Magnus Bane? The final puzzle piece?</p><p>Somehow it doesn’t feel like a win. There’s no vindication. It doesn’t change the impossible pull that threatens to tear his heart in two.</p><p>An ugly noise breaks through the silence. It takes Alec some time to realize that it comes from him - his choked up sobs filling the quickly darkening room.</p><p>There is no vindication. There is no absolution for Alec.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>As always, I want to thank everyone who read/commented/left me kudos. I love seeing your reactions and interpretations, ane/or hearing that you’re enjoying the story!</p><p>I know this reveal might be disappointing for some of you and I have so many thoughts I want to share about this chapter. I also don’t want to over-explain. Haha</p><p>So just to summarize my thoughts briefly, I wanted this fic to follow the Pride and Prejudice storyline as faithfully as I can in the confines of the characters. I gave it a lot of thought, and ultimately came to the conclusion that the boys aren’t perfect. They make some pretty bad mistakes and act really questionably throughout. They make stupid decisions based on limited information (they’ve barely had a full conversation without getting interrupted!), but their motivations are always based on their love for friends and family. Hopefully this makes them a little more realistic/relatable than unlikable... haha Personally, the toughest part in writing this was thinking of the collateral damage of people who got hurt or suffered because of their mistakes, and I know that’s the hardest part for the characters as well. Even more than their perceived missed opportunity of what they could have been. But now that the truth is out, we’re all set up to start fixing things… :)</p><p>Thanks for sticking with me and these frustrating boys so far! We’re over halfway there (you may have noticed I had to add an extra chapter… oops!), and things can only go up from here.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Aftermath</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The whirring of the engines are almost loud enough to drain out the sound of Alec’s intrusive thoughts. Almost, but not quite. As his flight descends into JFK, Alec’s mind keeps wandering back to the letter that’s burning a hole in the inner pocket of his duffel bag. It’s been two days since he first read the letter, which he now has practically memorized, word for word. Each reread cutting him deeper than the last. He can’t stop thinking about Magnus’ eyes; the lifeless, hollow orbs usually so expressive and full of light. I did that. He can’t stop thinking.</p><p>***</p><p>The dust settles after Magnus’ confession. Alec returns to New York and wonders how or if he can start fixing things. Another surprise awaits.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Friday, everyone! Thank you for all your kind comments and feedback from the last chapter - I’m glad that we got that taken care of so we can start on fixing the mess that Alec made for himself now. Haha</p><p>This week’s chapter is just kind of setting us up for the rest of the story, so there isn’t as much plot, but it pushes us forward. We also get a tiny sneak preview of our newest character at the end!</p><p>Thank you always for your comments/kudos/reading! I hope you enjoy the chapter.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The whirring of the engines are almost loud enough to drain out the sound of Alec’s intrusive thoughts. Almost, but not quite. As his flight descends into JFK, Alec’s mind keeps wandering back to the letter that’s burning a hole in the inner pocket of his duffel bag. It’s been two days since he first read the letter, which he now has practically memorized, word for word. Each reread cutting him deeper than the last. He can’t stop thinking about Magnus’ eyes; the lifeless, hollow orbs usually so expressive and full of light. <em> I did that</em>. He can’t stop thinking.</p><p>Alec was wrong. So wrong. He had let his stubborn pride dictate his behavior against Magnus, pushing him away with unnecessary callousness every single time Magnus made an effort to actually get to know him. Magnus isn’t innocent himself - Alec doesn’t even know where to begin with Jace and Clary. He hasn’t yet decided what he’ll tell Jace, if anything. While the man’s intentions may have been just, he acted on as much prejudice as Alec had with Magnus. </p><p>He thinks of Izzy - what if they were too late? If Magnus would have told Alec of Victor’s true nature to begin with, perhaps he wouldn’t have to be so worried of Izzy now. But Alec supposes Magnus was clear enough. His hate for Victor was evident, he made it clear that the man wasn’t good. Alec knows that if only he listened, the hints would have been enough. His instincts had been sending him warning signals about Victor since the moment they met. And even Alec can’t deny that, if he found himself in a similar situation, he would want to protect his loved one from the public eye. He can’t be upset at Magnus for hiding the details.</p><p>With hindsight, he sees how, at every turn, both men chose to act on their skeptical judgement rather than their good nature, leaving them at this impasse of hurt and rejection. Alec releases a soft groan and cradles his face in his hands, uncaring of the uncomfortable sideways glance the man seated next to him sends his way.</p><p>The worst part is that Alec knew deep down that he was wrong. Every time he saw Magnus, his instincts told him that Magnus couldn’t be so cruel. Even Jace, who was so misjudged by the man, saw it. But Magnus is charismatic, confident, and so self-assured. Alec let those qualities stroke every one of his insecurities about himself, his family, his work, and his lack of conviction. Then let them take over judgement and manifest into doubt. He thinks, perhaps, if he wasn’t so drawn to the other man, he wouldn’t have reacted so harshly; reason clouded by overwhelming emotion, he knows he wasn’t acting as rationally as he normally would. A frustrated sigh escapes his mouth. Alec’s making excuses and he knows it.</p><p><em> It doesn’t matter anyway, </em> his mind chimes in bitterly, <em> you fucked it up. </em>He doubts Magnus would want anything to do with him anymore.</p><p>He grips his fists tightly for the rest of the descent, his knuckles going white in the effort, and lets the dull pain of his fingernails against his palms keep him grounded.</p><p> </p><p>******************</p><p> </p><p>As soon as he drops his luggage off, he heads to the house he grew up in for their weekly family dinners. In reality, he’s impatient to see Izzy for the first time since learning of Victor’s history. But when he gets to the house, he sees Max, who’s working on an assignment in the living room, first.</p><p>“Alec!” Max greets him with a warm smile that quickly turns into a grimace when Alec ruffles his hair. Alec can’t help but laugh when Max complains.</p><p>“How’s everything been at home?” He’s only been gone a week, but without seeing his mother daily at work, it feels a lot longer. His brother worries his bottom lip between his teeth, hesitating before he answers.</p><p>“I mean, not too different since you left,” Max says, “Mom and Izzy have been fighting a lot. I don’t know what’s up with Izzy…”</p><p>The words in Magnus’ letter weigh heavily in Alec’s mind as he nods, “I’ll talk to her.”</p><p>“All she tells me is that she’s been tired from work,” he adds, wearily, “careful when you talk to Mom, too.”</p><p>Alec cocks his head in question.</p><p>“She’s got a whoooooole new stick up her ass for some reason,”</p><p>“Max!” Alec scolds, but there’s little heat behind it.</p><p>“What? It’s true!” He huffs with an exaggerated roll of his eyes. “She’s been stressed out, but she won’t talk about it.” He follows Alec into the kitchen as he goes to grab a glass of water. They start catching up on Max’s school when Izzy joins them.</p><p>“Alec! I thought I heard your voice!” She gives him a tight hug as she barges in. When they part, Alec takes in his sister - he feels like he hasn’t actually <em> looked </em> at her in so long. Her eyes are bright, smile genuine. Alec can see the shadow of dark bags under her eyes, hidden below a layer of makeup. Her skin is pale, but not alarmingly so. All in all, she looks… fine. While some tension seeps out of his shoulders at seeing his sister seem somewhat like her usual self, Alec’s done his research. After reading Magnus’ letter, he looked into Yinfen and its effects. He’s read enough to know that people can feel a burst of energy after a hit, and just by looking at her, Alec can’t know for sure if Victor may have already gotten his talons in his sister.</p><p>“Hey Izzy,” he smiles tentatively, “how’ve you been?”</p><p>She narrows his eyes at him like she knows there’s more to that question, the smile slowly fading from her face and being replaced by a curious look. Her mouth opens, but closes again like she thought better of it. She pushes away - the movement is subtle, but there’s enough force that Alec feels the rejection in the action. Izzy moves fluidly to the cupboards to take out a glass, a plastered-on smirk playing at her lips as she pours herself some water.</p><p>“I’m good. That internship at the crime lab is kicking my ass, but I’m learning a lot.” Izzy’s always been the smart one in the family, and Alec couldn’t hide the proud smile that surfaces on his face if he tried. “Otherwise it’s been pretty quiet, though. I don’t remember if I told you this, but Victor left New York around the same time as you.”</p><p>Her voice is even, but her gaze lingers a bit on Alec, as if she’s judging his response. He feels a distinct sense that he’s being baited and schools his expression just in case.</p><p>“Yeah? I didn’t know. I guess you’ll have to find someone else to keep you entertained now,” he teases. Izzy gasps in mock offense and her laughter that follows brings a much needed levity to Alec’s mood. The normalcy of the situation bringing him comfort.</p><p>“Actually,” she muses, “Lydia and Aline invited me to visit the Hamptons with them this weekend.”</p><p>“...oh?” Alec tries to keep his tone neutral.</p><p>Izzy nods with a hum, “it’s Lydia’s family summer home. I mentioned it to Mom, and she seemed happy. As long as it’s a ‘good’ family, right?” She quips with a wry smile.</p><p>“Where is she, anyway?” Alec asks, looking around.</p><p>Max shrugs, “she said she had business in the office. She’s bringing back dinner. Where’s Jace?”</p><p>It’s Alec’s turn to shrug as he leans against the kitchen counter. “He wasn’t home when I dropped off my stuff. I’m guessing he’ll be here soon,” he says, checking the time as he does so. As much of a workaholic his mother is, it’s rare for Maryse to be working at the office so late on a Sunday. He wonders what could be keeping her at work, when Izzy distracts him with a question about his trip. He recounts the details of his visit to Boston, quickly deciding not to mention his encounters with Magnus. Thankfully, Izzy latches on to another detail from his trip.</p><p>“Camille Belcourt?! Alec, she’s a <em> huge </em> deal!” Izzy exclaims when Alec tells her about the party he attended. Then, with a knowing smirk she adds, “did you know she used to date Magnus Bane?”</p><p>If Alec reacted at all to the unexpected mention of Magnus’ name, Izzy doesn’t seem to pay much attention. She continues unfazed, with an enthusiasm that Izzy shows for all things gossip.</p><p>“Apparently they’ve been on-again, off-again for years. Currently off-again for the longest time since they started dating. I think he’s done with her for good.” She scrunches up her nose. Alec can’t help his curiosity.</p><p>“What do you mean?” He finds himself asking against his better judgement.</p><p>“I mean, this is all hearsay, so I can’t say for sure… but it sounds like Camille just kind of did whatever she wanted in that relationship. She’s been caught cheating multiple times…”</p><p>The image of the woman’s snake-like grin and gleeful eyes resurface from Alec’s memories. He remembers how uncomfortable Magnus seemed to be in her presence and feels his body tense ever-so-slightly.</p><p>“I don’t know. She has a lot of influence, so I’m sure it’s hard to untangle yourself from someone like Camille,” adds Izzy, thoughtfully. Her eyebrows knit closely together as if she’s considering her own words. Alec just hums in agreeance, not trusting his voice to stay even.</p><p>“But then again,” she considers, “Magnus dropped us as soon as Clary left town, so maybe they’re deserving of each other.”</p><p>“Izzy,” Alec almost objects, the words at the tip of his tongue, when they hear the front door open. After a moment, Maryse walks in looking as put together as she always does, even with her hands full of paper bags full of food.</p><p>“Alec, you’re back,” she notes apathetically before continuing, “can one of you call Jace? Let him know that if he doesn’t get here within the next 20 minutes, we’re starting without him. I’m going to go freshen up real quick and I’ll be right out.”</p><p>Max mutters a quick “on it,” and takes his phone out, while Izzy starts to busy herself with taking out dishes. Alec follows his mother as she heads upstairs.</p><p>“Mom, do you have a moment?”</p><p>She looks at him with one eyebrow arched, but doesn’t seem angry or annoyed, which is a relief. Perhaps the week away did both of them some good. She heads to her bedroom and indicates for Alec to follow her with a small tilt of her head.</p><p>“What is it?” Alec leans on the doorframe and watches his mother sit at her vanity, her sharp eyes landing on Alec’s reflection in the mirror.</p><p>“Izzy mentioned she was headed to the Hamptons next week.” </p><p>“Yes, with Lydia Branwell and Aline Penhallow?” Maryse reaches up to take her earrings off as she nods.</p><p>“Do you know if the Branwells or the Penhallows are joining them on the trip?”</p><p>“As far as I know neither of them are in town right now… why?”</p><p>“...do you think it’s a good idea? Letting them head out of town just the three of them…”</p><p>His mother’s reflection squints at him. “All three of them are legally adults. Both Lydia and Aline are from respectable families, and they can make their own decisions.”</p><p>“But,” Alec tries to object, but is quickly interrupted.</p><p>“Perhaps they can snap some sense into Isabelle while they’re at it. It could do her well to spend some time with those girls.” She sounds annoyed, obviously not wanting to argue about this, but there’s a tight knot in Alec’s stomach and he can’t let it go.</p><p>“Mother,”</p><p>“Alec, it’s just for a few days, and in the meantime we’ll get some peace and quiet in the house. I don’t know what you’re trying to get at, but I’m not in the business of telling a grown woman what she can or cannot do.”</p><p>Alec’s jaw drops at that statement.</p><p>“Mother, that’s <em> all </em> you do,” the words fall out before he can think better of them and he regrets them immediately. Maryse’s glare narrows in annoyance and her lips stretch to a scowl.</p><p>“If you ever find yourself in my shoes, raising four children in a world such as ours, <em> then </em> you can tell me how you think I should do better,” she practically snaps at him. She pauses, “I guess you won’t have to worry ab-”</p><p>“Don’t. Don’t finish that sentence,” Alec grits out. Maryse purses her lips, clearly frustrated, but she at least seems to understand that she’s out of line. A tense stillness falls over the room, mother and son just looking at each other through their reflections. Maryse is the first to break, releasing a full body sigh and shifting her gaze back to her own reflection.</p><p>“Izzy is an adult. She doesn’t need you babying her, Alexander.”</p><p>Alec can’t argue with that without garnering more suspicion, so he doesn’t. Perhaps he’ll have another chance to speak with Izzy about it. He leaves with only an agitated huff.</p><p> </p><p>******************</p><p> </p><p>Dinner is a strained affair, even Max’s cheerful ribs are unable to puncture the tension in the air. After a few good-natured tries, he curls his lips in between his teeth in a chagrined expression. Jace, who walked in at the absolute last moment seems uninterested in conversation, and the only voices are Izzy occasionally asking about Alec’s trip, and Alec’s bare minimum responses.</p><p> </p><p>Not for the first time, Alec wonders why their mother insists on having these dinners.</p><p> </p><p>Other than her attempts to make small talk, Alec thinks Izzy might be avoiding him. He tries to get her alone while they clean up after dinner, but she seems to stick close to Max for the rest of the evening. Perhaps Alec is overanalyzing. Or perhaps Alec is being naive.</p><p>Jace and Alec don’t linger long after the clean-up. They call a car and say a few quick good-byes. If Alec hugs Izzy a little tighter than usual, she doesn’t say anything. Only looks at him with an unreadable expression.</p><p>“Travel safe, Izzy. Call me if you need anything,” he whispers as they part.</p><p>“It’ll only be for a few days, Alec,” she replies with a laugh that doesn’t reach her eyes. Alec just grips her shoulder tight before he lets go.</p><p> </p><p>Once they’re settled into their ride home, Jace lets out a huge sigh as if he couldn’t wait to leave.</p><p>“Glad to have you back, man. Mom’s been on my ass these days, helps to have you here to divide up her wrath,” he chuckles. He sounds drained, but the most like himself that Alec’s heard from him since he walked in for dinner.</p><p>Alec returns a weary smile. “Happy to help,” is all the response he can muster.</p><p>“So? How was Boston? Izzy told me you were stuck watching Andrew and Lorenzo making googly eyes to each other and attending swanky parties?”</p><p>His smile turns into a small grimace as Alec rolls his eyes. “Basically. It was great catching up with Andrew, though. He’s doing great over there. The party was, swanky, for sure, we ran into -”</p><p>He pauses, wondering for a moment if he should even mention Magnus. Maybe, maybe if Jace knew why Clary left, he would… what? Knowing Jace, he’s probably already convinced himself that she’s better off without him, blaming himself and justifying her actions without a second thought.</p><p>Jace watches him patiently, his head cocked to the side, elbow resting on the base of the window. And Alec is overcome by feeling; unable to shake the <em> what if</em>s that were unearthed by Magnus’ confessions. If the pair of them could have just been a little more open, more understanding, less quick to judge. He thinks of his brother dancing with Clary. Eyes narrowed and shining with boundless excitement. Giddy. In love.</p><p>“Alec?” A small wrinkle forms between Jace’s brow, and it pulls Alec out of his thoughts. He feels the twinge of guilt that he’s grown so familiar with over the last couple of days.</p><p>“Sorry,” he shakes his head in a vain attempt to dispel the dark fog that settled in his head, “we ran into some old friends of mine from law school.” The lie slips off his tongue a lot more comfortably than Alec likes. He wonders how he got to this point. Lying to Jace, his brother who he’s always shared everything with. He wonders if Jace can hear the deception. But his brother just hums in response and they chat idly for the rest of the trip. Alec thinks he should feel relief that Jace doesn’t doubt him, but the comfort doesn’t come.</p><p> </p><p>The quiet music in the car fills each pause between the safe topics the brothers bounce around. It’s some sort of jazz track, and the gentle beat of the bass punctuates those moments. <em> What’s one more little white lie? </em>Alec wonders to himself. After all that’s happened, everything that’s passed, he thinks maybe it’s better this way. Better that he doesn’t know.</p><p> </p><p>Better for who?</p><p> </p><p>The guilt sinks deeper into his stomach.</p><p> </p><p>******************</p><p> </p><p>The next afternoon, on his first day back in the office, Alec knocks on Maryse’s office door, unsure of what his mother wants this time. He’s come to be prepared for whatever his mother may throw his way when it comes to work (especially after seeing her determination with the whole Lorenzo debacle), but nothing would have prepared Alec for what he sees when he enters.</p><p>“...Robert.” He hates how timidly the name emerges.</p><p>“Nice to see you, Alec.” Robert, the once well-respected head of the Lightwood household, stands across from Maryse. He looks distinctly uncomfortable, fidgeting a little with his hands right below his chest. He points a nervous smile at his eldest son, who stays frozen by the door.</p><p>Maryse, on the other hand, looks completely unbothered. She leans back in her chair behind her desk, eyes trained on Alec.</p><p>“Come inside, Alec. And please close the door behind you.”</p><p>Alec follows without arguing, but once the doors are closed, he doesn’t step closer. He remains near the exit, watching his parents with a suspicious gaze as he collects himself after the initial shock.</p><p>“What is he doing here?” His tone is calm but cold. He aims for indifference and thinks he does a fairly good job at it. Maryse’s eyes flit toward Robert then back at Alec. She pulls her lips into a tight line, considering her words carefully.</p><p>“Well, your father and I have come to an understanding.”</p><p>Alec cocks his head to the side. “An understanding?”</p><p>“We are… professionally reconciling,” Maryse says it like she’s trying out the term. Savoring the words to see if she likes them or not. Alec can’t believe what he’s hearing.</p><p>“What?!”</p><p>His mother nods, as if she’s settled on that term and continues, “we’ve decided it’s best for the firm for us to put our disagreements aside,”</p><p>“Disagreements?” He can’t help but interrupt. The news seems out of the blue, too much a surprise even coming from his mother. “Mother, he… the family…”</p><p>“While I’m sure there will be some tasteless talk, we’re confident that it’ll settle eventually,” she adds, as self-assured as always, they’ve clearly thought this through. “Our clients are confident in our abilities, and we deliver. Our personal conflicts aside.”</p><p>All Alec can do is gape. He can’t believe he’s hearing this. Seeing his father for the first time in a little over a year, the first time since he took his hiatus.</p><p>“We also have a plan…” Robert cuts in, “I was planning to move to the west coast. Los Angeles, to be exact. I have connections, a few potential clients lined up, if we open up a branch there and I work from LA,”</p><p>“You think the drama won’t follow you?” Alec sneers, “I hate to break it to you, but New York socialites love nothing more than gossip. I’m sure they’ve got connections over in California, too.”</p><p>Maryse points a sharp look at her son, clearly unamused. “Alexander, you aren’t being helpful.”</p><p>He scoffs.</p><p>“We want you to spend a week in LA,” Robert instructs him, “take a few meetings. These people know me, but I want them to know you as well. Really sell the ‘family business’ image.” His lips curl up in a nervous smile, he’s clearly uncertain of how Alec might react.</p><p>“We want them to see that we’re a united front. Even without a personal reconciliation, we’re all professional adults,” Maryse explains, her eyes are cool and calculating. Not quite the ‘united family’ image they say they want to sell.</p><p>Alec shakes his head in resignation, “I can’t believe the two of you.”</p><p>Robert winces, a pained frown rises to his face. “It’s a smart call, Alec. You have a keen sense for business. You should understand.”</p><p>His mother glances at her computer screen. “You leave the day after tomorrow,” her voice is level and businesslike. This is clearly just another business decision for her, and not something that could cause another catastrophic shift in their family dynamic.</p><p>It suddenly dawns on Alec that none of his siblings must have been told. The extra work hours? The stress and irritability? Maryse had made this decision on her own, acted on it, and put it all in effect without telling any of them. Frustration burns deep in his gut.</p><p>“I just got back.” Alec pushes down his anger, first dealing with the issue right in front of him.</p><p>“You can work remotely from California,” she responds, completely disregarding Alec’s opposition.</p><p>“It’s for the firm, Alec,” Robert practically pleads. As if he’s the reasonable one. As if he didn’t walk out on the family. As if those years of silence and neglect that followed Alec coming out had never happened.</p><p>“You…” he looks between his mother and his father, lost. He feels like a child again; unsure of the next step, wanting desperately to please his parents, but hating everything that entails. He’s been feeling that uncertainty a lot recently.</p><p>“...fine,” he finally exhales. “Send me the information for your contacts. I’ll set up meetings.”</p><p>He doesn’t look at Robert, who grins at him as if he sincerely thinks they’re in this together - a family unit. He can’t look at his mother without feeling like he might be sick. So he turns and places his hand on the doorknob.</p><p>“If that’s all,” he pauses before leaving, trying not to make it seem like he’s running (even though really, that’s what he’s doing).</p><p>“Yes, thank you Alec.”</p><p>He barely waits for his mother to finish before leaving.</p><p> </p><p>As soon as he’s back in his office, he takes his phone out of his pocket. If he’s being sent to California for a week, he’s going to make the best of it. Maybe it can be good for him. After the complete shitshow that was his trip to Boston, maybe seeing someone so far removed from this tangled mess that he had made could be a good change of pace. Perhaps someone who wasn’t there from the beginning could provide some much needed perspective. He goes through his contacts and finds a number that he hasn’t called in far too long. It should be around lunchtime in California, so he decides to call rather than text.</p><p>The phone rings for a while. Alec let’s the repetitive electric tone comfort him a bit. He notices himself tapping his fingers slowly with each ring. After what feels like forever, just long enough that Alec’s nerves have started to calm, the call connects.</p><p>“If it isn’t Alec Lightwood…” A warm friendly voice echoes through the phone, “finally decided that you aren’t too good for me after all?”</p><p>Alec laughs at the greeting. It really has been too long since he called.</p><p>“Hey Maia. How’ve you been?”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks for reading!! Full disclosure, I’ve fallen a bit behind on my writing - I’ve been having a bit of a rough month. Then this week happened. As an Asian American, this week has been incredibly difficult, and I haven’t been able to focus as much on writing. I’m going to try my best to keep with my regular Friday posting schedule, but I am sorry if I fall a bit behind…! I have no plans to abandon the fic, it’ll get finished no matter what (we’re getting so close!), but it just might take a tiny bit longer than I expected.<br/>Thanks for sticking through it with me!<br/>To my fellow AAPI friends, please stay safe out there. Sending you love.</p><p>tsujiharu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Properly Humbled</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“Alec!” He hears the warm, welcoming call before he sees her. The noise around him seems to soften immediately, and when he turns toward the voice, he sees Maia’s dark curls and sparkling eyes. A wide, bright smile adorns her face. She comes running up to him to give him a huge hug; Alec doesn’t know anyone who hugs quite like Maia Roberts.</p><p>***</p><p>Alec meets up with Maia on his trip to LA, where he makes an unexpected run-in to someone he doesn’t expect to see again.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Friday!</p><p>I am back, and I’m getting back on track with the writing as well. Thank you all for your kind words and understanding. It’s been a tough couple of weeks, but your words meant so much to me.</p><p>Just some housekeeping - I did edit a few tags. I was kidding myself when I thought this was going to gear toward fluff... but also added some tags related to the story, so please heed the tags when reading.</p><p>This chapter got a bit out of hand and ended up way longer than the others, but I didn’t want to cut it up any further (consider it me making up for missing a week ;) ). We get two new characters and Malec having an actual conversation, so I hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>LAX is teeming with people. Alec can’t help but feel a little overwhelmed by the hustle and bustle of voices and movement all around him, feeling his anxiety creep up a bit as his eyes dart from face to face, looking for his friend.</p><p>“Alec!” He hears the warm, welcoming call before he sees her. The noise around him seems to soften immediately, and when he turns toward the voice, he sees Maia’s dark curls and sparkling eyes. A wide, bright smile adorns her face. She comes running up to him to give him a huge hug; Alec doesn’t know anyone who hugs quite like Maia Roberts.</p><p>Alec has known Maia since undergrad. They met through LGBTQ+ events, and the two, along with Andrew, got close over the last couple of years of Alec’s undergraduate career. While Alec and Andrew stayed on the East Coast, Maia seemed to be destined for the sun, and promptly moved to San Diego to pursue her graduate degree in Marine Biology. She relocated to Los Angeles after obtaining her degree and has been living her best life out here since. The three try to keep in regular contact, but with Alec being distracted by work, his family, and Magnus, he hasn’t been keeping up with Maia as much as he wishes he was. Alec considered inviting Andrew on this trip, but selfishly, he wanted the step away from everything he brought upon himself in New York; seeing Maia, who hasn’t been involved in any of the recent doings, seemed like an opportunity for some fresh perspective.</p><p>As they part from their hug, his friend looks at him with narrowed eyes, one eyebrow raised suspiciously.</p><p>“So I barely hear from you for months and suddenly you’ve got work in LA, huh?”</p><p>Alec chuckles, “I know, I know. You can thank my parents for that.” His laugh turns down into a small grimace as Maia’s eyebrows shoot up.</p><p>“Your parents? As in, the both of them?” He can understand her surprise. Maia had regularly checked in on him during his parent’s divorce, and she knows a lot of the details. When Alec offers a wordless nod in response, she lets him go with a wince. “Clearly we’ve got a lot to catch up on. Let’s go.”</p><p>They quickly make their way to the parking lot and out of the airport. Traffic is heavy and the cars around them are constantly honking at each other for no apparent reason (“welcome to LA,” Maia chuckles), but they easily pass the time making small talk about Maia’s work and the ensemble of characters she works with. They chat about Andrew and his move to Boston (his friend tosses her head back laughing when she hears about Alec’s desperate measures to escape Lorenzo’s attention and of how the two met at the gala thanks to Alec).</p><p>“We talked just last month. He seems happy,” she mentions between breathy laughs.</p><p>“Yeah,” Alec smiles, a warmth spreads in his heart as he thinks of his best friend. “I think he is.”</p><p>Maia glances at him as she drives and smirks, “so? How about you? Anyone new in your life?”</p><p>Alec feels his chest tighten at the question. The question seems so simple, yet so loaded (but is it really? <em> You fucked it up</em>, his brain helpfully reminds him of the fact). He sighs.</p><p>“I’m starting to think I wasn’t built for dating,” he mutters self-deprecatingly.</p><p>“Ah, well there’ll be plenty to distract you while you’re here.” She points a toothy grin at Alec, lightly elbowing his shoulder. “I’ve been itching for a hike for a while, actually. <em> What are men to rocks and mountains</em>, am I right?”</p><p>Alec releases a huff of laughter.</p><p>“So let’s start with something easier. Tell me more about why your parents, the ones who haven’t spoken in about a year, are sending you to LA.”</p><p>That, he can do. Alec recounts how he came to find out that his parents had “professionally reconciled” and how they want Alec to spread the image of a “united front”. He explains that his father, who had been absent from his life well before his parents’ separation stood there and talked to him as if the last few years had never happened. The denial after Alec came out. The silence. The affair. The abandonment.</p><p>By the time Alec finishes telling the story, Maia is pulling up to Alec’s hotel. She lets out a soft whistle.</p><p>“Yeah, you definitely need a distraction,” she sighs. “How much work do you have for the week?”</p><p>Alec glances at the calendar on his phone. “A few meetings, mostly tomorrow and a few morning meetings the day after. I have some active cases that I need to work on, but I can do that anytime online.”</p><p>With a nod, Maia parks the car and turns toward Alec.</p><p>“Tomorrow night, I’m taking you out. The afternoon after, we go on a hike.”</p><p>“I need to get up early on Thursday for my meetings - can’t stay out too late tomorrow...”</p><p>“Okay, so we won’t go crazy. There’s this fun arcade-themed place that opened up recently. I haven’t been yet but I’ve heard great things. We should check it out,” Maia explains excitedly. Her enthusiasm brings a smile to Alec’s face.</p><p>“Thanks for picking me up, Maia. Lunch is on me.”</p><p>“Sweet!” She claps her hands with unabashed glee, and something that feels a lot like joy warms Alec’s heart. Calling Maia was a good idea.</p><p> </p><p>*******************</p><p> </p><p>The next night they find themselves at <em> Havoc</em>. Maia explains to him how the place is an arcade “bar” without the alcohol. She notes that they actually have a zero tolerance policy for any substance, which seems like a strange point to raise until she elaborates that the backstory was picked up for a local story when they opened; the owner wanted to create a space for recovering addicts to safely gather. Once she gets to the point in the story that the owner was inspired to create this kind of space for his close friend who was in recovery, Alec has a sinking feeling in his stomach. A club/bar/venue owner with a close friend who happens to be a recovering addict. He looks up at the bright sign that displays the name of the establishment - the font suddenly looking like it could be a sister sign to Pandemonium back in Brooklyn. But as far as he knew, Magnus’ establishments were all in the East Coast… or were they? He never bothered to check, considering he had been avoiding everything related to the man for most of the time that he had known him. And since getting back from Boston he’s been actively trying (and failing) not to obsess over him.</p><p>“Does this owner happen to be Magnus Bane…?” He bites the bullet and decides to ask Maia. She narrows her eyes curiously.</p><p>“That actually sounds right,” then with a tilt of her head she asks, “do you know him?”</p><p>Alec can’t stifle the scoff that falls out of his mouth. Because fuck his life. What are the chances he randomly ends up at a venue that Magnus owns all the way across the country? If Magnus were to see him now, Alec wouldn’t blame the man for accusing him of stalking him. All after the bullheaded rejection that Alec put him through. His cheeks burn in embarrassment as he thinks of their argument.</p><p>“Alec are you <em> blushing</em>?” Maia sounds amused. “Wait, is this guy related to why you were sounding so down about dating in the car yesterday?”</p><p>And because Alec has never been known for being suave, he actually <em> sputters </em> in response.</p><p>“Uh, no, he… uh…” He takes a deep breath as he tries to remember how to put words together. “He spent a lot of time in New York last spring. We, uhm, we actually never got along all that well. Kind of got trapped in misunderstandings…” he says in way of explanation. Maia nibbles at her bottom lip, still looking at Alec with a fair amount of skepticism, but nods. Alec smiles at her weakly, grateful that she isn’t pushing it further.</p><p>“It would just be kinda awkward to run into him here, all the way across the country, in a place he owns,” he laughs.</p><p>Maia peers inside, not that she can see much through the crowd, nor would she be able to recognize Magnus even if she saw him.</p><p>“We could go somewhere else if it really bothers you, but if I remember correctly this guy mainly operates on the East Coast, right? I doubt he’s actually here tonight,” she says. Alec knows she’s likely right. The odds of Magnus being at LA at the same time as him, and choosing to come here tonight are abysmal. So he takes in a steeling breath and tucks his chin.</p><p>“Let’s check out what all the fuss is about.”</p><p> </p><p>Havoc turns out to be a perfect place for the two of them that night. The atmosphere does indeed exude “bar vibes”, with a selection of mocktails and soft drinks available from the bar. There are several rooms lined with arcade games, but it somehow doesn’t overwhelm the space with game noises, and the background music can still be heard throughout the building. There’s a room further back with a dance floor, a stage with a turntable for DJs, but Alec can see that the place is also set up so that they can host live music as well. When Maia and Alec explore the various rooms they also find an upstairs with multiple pool tables, air hockey, and a few more old school games. While there isn’t anything family unfriendly, the place still serves an 18+ clientele, feeding into the overall nightlife feel. They start with Crazy Taxi, which Maia easily beats him in (“when’s the last time you actually drove a car?” she teases), followed by a few rounds of Resident Evil (they make a great team against zombies), and trash talk their way through rounds of Tekken (which happens to be one of the few games where they’re evenly matched, thanks to Jace’s obsession with fighting games). Maia even manages to convince Alec to play some Taiko no Tatsujin, and while Alec feels like he should be embarrassed that he’s actually worked up a sweat after challenging the expert level, he can’t remember the last time he laughed so freely and the feeling of joy seems to come out on top.</p><p>It was nice, being with someone who wasn’t aware of the mess he left in New York. Someone who knew him well enough to know when he needs a distraction and is up for the task, no questions asked. Between Maia and Andrew, Alec often finds himself wondering what he’s done to deserve such loving friends. He tries to show his appreciation whenever he can, he really does, but when Maia suggests he step up for a round of DDR, that’s where he draws the line.</p><p>“Oh come on, Alec! Let loose! Have some fun!” She goads him while tugging on his arm, which only makes Alec work harder to keep his heels rooted where he stands.</p><p>“You <em> know </em> what a nightmare I am on my feet. That is not happening.”</p><p>“But it’s so much more fun with a second player…! Pleaaaaaaassseeeee?” She sticks her best puppy-dog eyes at him, and Alec feels his commitment waver.</p><p>“Would you perhaps take on a challenger instead?”</p><p>A hesitant voice comes from behind them, making Alec freeze in his spot. Maia notices how his eyes bulge, and her gaze flickers to the owner of the voice. Alec doesn’t need to turn around to know who it is. He recognizes the deep, sweet smoothness of the tone. He didn’t expect to ever hear it again (he doesn’t deserve to ever hear it again). His friend shifts her eyes between Alec and the man and finally cocks her head to the side.</p><p>“And who might this challenger be?” She asks with a playful cockiness, and now that Maia’s engaged, he knows he can’t avoid it any further. It takes him a few seconds, his entire body is rigid with nerves, but he forces himself to face the owner of the voice.</p><p>“M- Magnus,” the name escapes with his breath. Because <em> of course </em> he’s here, looking at Alec with just as much trepidation in his warm, brown eyes as Alec is feeling. Magnus Bane. In the flesh.</p><p>He flashes a tentative smile, “hello Alexander.”</p><p>Alec’s insides melt at the soft tone with which Magnus says his name (he doesn’t deserve it). As he starts to open his mouth to respond, to ask what Magnus is doing here, or to make an excuse as to why Alec’s here, an enthusiastic voice shatters the fragile moment.</p><p>“Alexander? <em> The </em>Alexander?”</p><p>The voice brings Alec’s attention to the man standing next to Magnus for the first time. He’s almost as tall as Magnus with ruffled brown hair that looks somewhere between “I just got out of bed” and “I styled it this way”. He’s watching Alec with an excited sparkle in his eyes, which are framed by thick rim glasses that he pulls off in an effortless nerdy look. He’s practically bouncing on the spot with energy, a wolfish grin plastered on his face.</p><p>“Dude! I’ve heard so much about you, I feel like I know you already!” He chuckles as he steps forward before Magnus can stop him, offering Alec a handshake, “I’m Simon!”</p><p>Alec looks at Simon’s hand, unsure of how to react until Maia elbows him not-so-gently. It jolts him back into action and he rushes to take Simon’s hand.</p><p>“Right, yeah, uh, you as well,” Alec winces at how stilted the words sound even for him. He stands a little straighter, “nice to meet you Simon. You can call me Alec.”</p><p>Maia clears her throat pointedly next to him.</p><p>“Oh!” Already, Alec can sense his blush rising.  “This is my friend Maia Roberts. Maia, this is Simon - you probably heard that -” he cringes at the disaster this is shaping up to be, “- and Magnus Bane.”</p><p>His eyes settle on Magnus, and the knot in his stomach tightens. He hopes that no one expects him to say anything else, because he feels as though he’s already used up all of the words his panicked mind is capable of. Magnus smiles again, wary but kind.</p><p>“Hello Maia, it’s a pleasure to meet you.” He offers Maia a hand, which she takes easily.</p><p>“This is a fun space you’ve created here,” she adds to her greeting, instantly making it impossible for Alec to pretend he didn’t know Magnus owned the place.</p><p>Magnus chuckles, sounding a lot more comfortable now that he isn’t talking to Alec; the thought comes with a dash of pain. “Thank you, it’s one of my personal favorites.” He glances back toward the DDR machine, “I understand Alexander here doesn’t think of himself as much of a dancer; if you’re looking for an opponent I’d be happy to volunteer.”</p><p>“<em> Alexander </em> -” Maia points a knowing smirk at Alec, emphasizing the name that she knows Alec hates to be called, “is a fucking wuss, and I would very much appreciate that!”</p><p>Magnus huffs a laugh and steps up on the machine. He pulls a set of keys and sticks it in the keyhole next to the coin slot. When the gameplay menu comes up, he winks at Maia and brings his index finger up in a shushing motion, making her laugh.</p><p>“Score!” She pulls Alec into a sideways hug, adding cheekily, “I knew there was a reason I kept you around. Feel free to introduce me to all your arcade-owning friends.”</p><p>Alec wrinkles his nose at that, “unfortunately for you, Magnus is the one and only.” As soon as the words are out of his mouth, Alec regrets the awkward phrasing. Magnus’ head darts back to shoot him an unreadable look, and Alec almost makes a fool of himself all over again by trying to explain. Thankfully, Maia saves him by letting out a hearty laugh.</p><p>“Well then I’m glad he happened to be here today. Let’s get this show on the road!”</p><p>Alec and Simon take a seat at a nearby table to watch the two, and just as Alec expected, Magnus is very, <em> very </em> skilled at DDR. He doesn’t just move his feet as needed. His whole body moves with grace and a flourish, making it look like a performance more than a game. Alec doesn’t even try to pretend that he isn’t ogling the man, when a voice pulls him back to reality.</p><p>“He’s such a show-off,” Simon grins from beside him with a small eye-roll, “it’s maddening because he’s actually so good at it.”</p><p>Alec chuckles, “now I’m definitely glad that I didn’t let Maia convince me to play.”</p><p>“Magnus said you weren’t half-bad at dancing!” Simon replies emphatically, and the comment has Alec’s eyes widening in horror.</p><p>“Uh, yeah, he lied,” he says with a grimace.</p><p>The quip earns him a bright laugh from Simon who looks at him with crinkled eyes - the man smiles with his whole face, every feature lighting up with joy.</p><p>“He seemed to believe it,” he smiles, more gently this time, “sounds like Magnus, though. He’s very forgiving of the people he cares about.”</p><p><em> People he cares about</em>. The words float in the air uneasily. Simon doesn’t seem to know of Magnus and his history, talking about them as if they’re friends, which never exactly was the case.</p><p>“And he obviously cares about you,” he adds, teasingly. Alec feels his mouth go dry, the air in the arcade suddenly feeling a bit thin.</p><p>“He... what?” He asks, eloquently, earning a good-natured huff from Simon. But instead of following up on the thought, Simon changes the subject, catching Alec off guard again.</p><p>“So what are you doing in LA? You live in New York, right?”</p><p>“Yeah, I do. Uh, here for work,” he manages to explain.</p><p>Simon nods, “cool, and you’re a lawyer?”</p><p>“How much has Magnus told you about me?” Alec asks, he’s torn between being amused and feeling uncomfortable, as Simon seems to know a lot more about him than a casual mention. It almost sounds as if… as if Magnus actually talked to Simon about Alec.</p><p>Simon laughs, “sorry, I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable! Just happy to finally meet you.”</p><p>The warmth in his voice puts Alec a bit at ease, “and you? What do you do?”</p><p>“I’m an accountant,” he says, crinkling his nose like the thought of his profession is unappealing, “it’s what I studied in school. Thought it was a safe bet, which it is, safe and boring. But I’m actually an aspiring singer-songwriter.” It’s clearly what he identifies with more, as his cheerful grin returns to his face.</p><p>“That’s pretty cool - do you live in LA or are you just visiting?” Alec asks, making easy conversation. He isn’t used to conversing so smoothly with strangers, but Simon seems to have a knack at drawing people into conversation.</p><p>“I actually live in Boston with Magnus. We’re visiting a friend out here in LA.”</p><p>Alec can’t help but wonder if they’re here visiting Clary, and a sinking feeling returns to his stomach. The emotional rollercoaster this night has turned into is already exhausting.</p><p>But before Alec can say anything in response, Maia, who seems to have appeared out of nowhere, dramatically leans onto Alec’s shoulder.</p><p>“You should’ve told me your friend was a shark! That was embarrassing,” she laughs. Magnus’ eyes are narrowed in a smile.</p><p>“You were a very worthy opponent. Valiant effort.”</p><p>Maia scoffs at that. They’re both covered by a light sheen of sweat, they must have done a few dances while Simon and Alec were chatting. Magnus is glowing under the low light, and Alec feels his Adam's apple bob over the dry lump that’s quickly forming in his throat. The man catches him staring, and Alec doesn’t even have a chance to feel embarrassed when Magnus stares right back. His gaze is intense, silently questioning. As much as he wants to (but does he really want to?), Alec can’t tear his gaze away. He takes the moment to actually look into Magnus’ eyes. Trying to gauge what might be running through his mind. Alec can’t find any hint of the hatred or anger that he expects to see. Suddenly, he feels a stinging heat behind his eyes, which is what finally brings Alec to turn away. He doesn’t deserve Magnus’ forgiveness. From his peripheral vision he sees Magnus shift uncomfortably on his feet; but Magnus seems to recover from their charged moment quickly enough, as he turns to the whole group.</p><p>“I’m sorry I’m being a terrible host! let me get everyone a round of drinks. Any preferences?” Despite Alec’s objections, he takes everyone’s order and disappears toward the bar as though he couldn’t get away fast enough. Alec grimaces, wondering if he made him uncomfortable.</p><p>“No use arguing with Magnus, Alec,” says Simon, watching Magnus as he weaves through the crowd. “He lives to take care of his friends, <em> and </em>he’s as stubborn as a bull.”</p><p>“Sounds like someone I know,” Maia grins, nudging Alec with her shoulder. Simon watches them with a fondness that coils tightly around Alec’s heart. He doesn’t deserve this, he thinks again. Maia, perhaps noticing the shift in her friend’s mood, turns her attention to Simon.</p><p>“So Simon! How about you? Magnus has proved himself to be the expert at DDR - what games do you play?”</p><p>It’s a conversation that Simon seems more than happy to take part in, and they almost instantly fall into a friendly argument about whether Galaga or Space Invaders is the superior classic. It bleeds into their love for all things Sci-Fi, and before he knows it, Alec finds himself silently nodding along to the two talking about their favorite Star Trek episodes (Simon insists that they can’t beat <em> The Trouble with Tribbles </em> from the original series, which led to the beauty that is <em> Trials and Tribble-ations</em>, and Maia scoffs at him for falling for the adorable fluffy aliens. She argues that no one can beat Picard, and declares <em> The Drumhead </em>as the best. Simon calls her basic). By the time Magnus comes back with drinks, the two are debating as if they’ve known each other for years.</p><p>“I didn’t expect to ever meet anyone who could match Simon on his nerdiness,” he laughs, placing the drinks on their table.</p><p>Alec chuckles, “he’s saving me the energy of having to pretend like I know what she’s talking about. Thank you for the drinks, you really didn’t have to…”</p><p>“It’s my pleasure,” Magnus assures him.</p><p>“Hey Magnus, Alec! Maia and I’m going to go check out the classics room,” Simon announces as he stands, “you two want to join?”</p><p>“I think we’ll sit this one out,” Magnus answers before Alec can get a thought in, “unless Alec wanted to check it out?”</p><p>Alec feels a mild panic brewing at the thought of being left alone with Magnus, but the thought is almost as exciting as it is terrifying. Maia sends him a meaningful glance, head tilted in question. It takes Alec a moment, but he nods to let her know he’s okay.</p><p>“No, you two go ahead. We’ll hold our table,” he manages. The excuse sounds feasible enough, and when Magnus flashes him an uncertain but genuine smile, he knows he made the right choice.</p><p>The table is silent immediately after Maia and Simon step away. It’s tense and uncomfortable, both men waiting for the other to break first. All it takes is a moment -</p><p> </p><p>“Alexander,”</p><p>“Magnus,”</p><p> </p><p>Alec can’t help but melt a little when he hears Magnus’ laugh (that sounds embarrassingly close to a nervous giggle) that escapes him.</p><p>“Go ahead,” Magnus motions to Alec.</p><p>Alec breathes in a sharp inhale before he blurts out, “I… I wanted to apologize. I wouldn’t have come here if I knew you were going to be here.” It’s impossible not to notice how Magnus’ shoulders deflate a bit at the words.</p><p>“Oh,” he exhales, “that’s quite alright, Alec.” The name almost sounds unnatural now, coming from Magnus. “There was no way for you to know we were visiting. Let alone that we would be at Havoc tonight. It’s pretty clear you didn’t plan for this to happen,” he chuckles warily, fingers moving up to fidget with the silver cuff on his ear.</p><p>Alec has a distinct feeling that he’s already fucking this up again. All he can do is nod nervously and search for anything else to talk about.</p><p>“This place, Maia mentioned the backstory behind it… is it for…?” He looks toward the general direction that Simon disappeared into, and Magnus’ lips curl into a more tender, sincere smile.</p><p>“Yes. It’s actually the only establishment I own in LA. I only opened it because I usually come here with Simon when we visit Clary,” he shifts uncomfortably when he mentions the red head, but keeps going, “I actually have sober venues in every city I own bars in. Simon says I don’t need to, but… he deserves to have more options where he can feel comfortable and safe. And hopefully not so alone.”</p><p>Alec feels a soft sting in his heart. Just from the way Magnus speaks, he can tell how much love he has for Simon - like a brother to him, he remembers.</p><p>“Yeah… I would do almost anything for my siblings as well,” he responds, thinking of Jace, Izzy, and Max back at home.</p><p>“They’re all I have, my friends.” Magnus takes a sip of his drink and looks across the room with a far-away expression,  “I never had much of a relationship with blood-related family. I never knew who my father was until he died, and my mother passed away when I was still a child.”</p><p>A deep crease forms between Alec’s brows.</p><p>“I bounced around foster families until I was 18, managed to graduate from high school, but couldn’t afford college. That was when I found out my father had died. He was a wealthy businessman, and for some inexplicable reason left me a sizable fortune… perhaps he felt guilty,” he grimaces as if the thought is unpleasant, “but who was I to look a gift horse in its mouth? I took it, used it to get myself through college, and bought my first bar with that money. The rest, I suppose you’d say, is history.”</p><p>Their eyes finally meet once Magnus finishes talking. Alec has no doubt that the furrow between his brows is still there when Magnus’ eyes widen in slight alarm.</p><p>“I’m sorry Alexander. I’m sure you don’t care to hear my sad little origin story,” he mutters an apology, laughing it away like it’s no big deal. It has Alec shaking his head, a touch more assertively than he planned.</p><p>“No, it’s fine. I… it’s nice. Learning more about you.” He murmurs, barely a whisper. Magnus looks at him surprised and more than a little confused, but he smiles again.</p><p>“Tell me more about your family,” he urges instead, taking another sip of his drink. He seems more relaxed now, perhaps figuring that Alec wasn’t going to scream at him again. Alec matches the other man’s body language as he releases the tension that held his shoulders tight.</p><p>He tells Magnus about Max first, since he hasn’t met him yet (<em>yet</em>, seems delusional, when Alec gives himself a moment to think about it - he doesn’t). How clever and witty the boy is. How good he is at saying the right thing at the right time to take the tension out of the air and pull his family back together. Magnus watches him with that sparkle in his eyes that Alec has always been enamored with, the one he thought he would never get to see again. He chuckles at some of Max’s mischievous antics that Alec tells him about and tuts empathetically when Alec ends up at the receiving end of a prank in a story.</p><p>Alec then tells him about Izzy. How bright and brilliant she is. How kind and generous and giving. He tells him how caring and loving she is, and how good she is at coaxing out problems when she knows something’s bothering her siblings. He doesn’t tell Magnus about how she hasn’t been acting herself, how she’s been fighting more and more with their mother, or how he’s worried she might be addicted to yinfen. Magnus doesn’t bring any of that up. He doesn’t ask. Instead, he smiles and nods appreciatively, piping up every now and then about how he noticed those qualities in Izzy, and Alec can’t help the burst of pride he feels.</p><p>Then they get to Jace. Alec hesitates for a moment, thinking back to their fight in Boston. But Jace deserves his praise just as much as Izzy or Max, and Magnus needs to know that. So, while he can’t quite bring himself to look at the other man as he does so, he tells Magnus about Jace. How he’s the best friend and brother a man could have asked for. He tells Magnus about his loyalty. How he didn’t even stop to think before leaving the Lightwood home with Alec when Robert and Maryse threatened to disown him. How he would trust Jace with his life. And how he wants the world for his brother, regardless of how little Jace thinks he deserves it. By the time he finishes speaking, he’s surprised to find how much he’s shared. He can rarely get through small talk without embarrassing himself, but talking to Magnus comes shockingly easy. When he finally lets his gaze settle on Magnus, he’s surprised to find the pain in the man’s features.</p><p>“I’m so sorry,” Magnus’ voice is taut, like he’s speaking past a pit. Alec shakes his head, hating that he caused this man any more pain than he already has.</p><p>“Just wanted you to know where I was coming from. I know the yelling wasn’t helping,” he aims for a joking tone, but the end result is more like a jeer. An ugly sound that he doesn’t want Magnus to think is his fault.</p><p>“I can see why you’re so protective of them,” Magnus manages a faint quirk of his lips, just a ghost of a smile and Alec wishes he could turn it into the bright smile that often lights up Magnus’ face. It feels immense, though - this chasm built by the misunderstandings they let come between them, and that carefree version of Magnus feels so far away.</p><p>“My parents, though, they’re a piece of work,” Alec leans back into his chair as he talks. He notices Magnus sit up a little straighter at the mention of his parents.</p><p>“When I was just starting up,” the man begins, “I was looking for legal representation. Your family firm had excellent reviews so I reached out for a meeting.”</p><p>Alec wasn’t expecting for Magnus to share his experience with his parents. Given Camille’s words at the party, he had kind of put two and two together. But he remained silent, hoping that the lack of defensiveness would encourage Magnus to keep going.</p><p>“Your parents met with me, but after taking one look at me, made it pretty clear they had no intention of representing me. I believe there were some mentions of ‘abominations’ and people ‘<em>like me</em>’. It seems they were less than impressed with how I presented myself.” Magnus laughs it off, but the words make ice settle deep down in Alec’s stomach.</p><p>“I suppose that’s why I was so surprised that you were openly gay, which again, was a completely embarrassing assumption on my part, and I’m still very sorry about that. But I had heard that Maryse Lightwood still ran the firm in the same way as she did before Robert had left, and the rumor was that their eldest son was practically her pawn -” his eyes dart to Alec nervously as he says the words, but he keeps going when Alec just shoots him a wry smile, “- so I heard your name and immediately carried on with my petty, vindictive assumptions. It was cruel and unnecessary... I enjoyed Isabelle’s company - and yours and Jace’s even, when I let my guard down enough to actually let myself enjoy it, but…” he sighs, seeming defeated.</p><p>Alec can understand the frustration. It’s all in the past, why rehash it now? But he also can’t deny how good it feels to finally understand why they got to this point. How they managed to cause each other so much pain, and perhaps how they can start healing.</p><p>So Alec musters the courage to place his hand on Magnus’ sleeve. The man looks up at him with surprise and something else in his deep brown eyes. “It’s unfair for me to just let you apologize like that, Magnus. I operated on just as many unfair assumptions as you did. I never bothered to sit down like this and actually talk to you. We could’ve saved a lot of time and energy, don’t you think?” He tries for a grin, and while he doesn’t think it’s fully there, he’s relieved when Magnus mirrors him.</p><p>“And I enjoyed your company, too…” Alec adds, “when we weren’t too busy with our heads up our asses.” He trying not to let the blush creeping up his neck stop him, “which reminds me. Did you oversell my dancing skills to Simon? Because I sure as hell don’t remember dancing <em> well </em> at that gala.”</p><p>That earns a wholehearted burst of laughter from Magnus.</p><p>“I simply told him that it was a pleasure to dance with you. But if I remember correctly, you kept up with me just fine,”</p><p>“Barely,” Alec can’t help but interject.</p><p>“I think you’re severely underselling your abilities,” Magnus points out, “you danced well.”</p><p>“Or maybe I just had the right partner,” the honest words slip out of him before he can filter his thoughts, and now that they’re out there, it seems to stun both men into silence for a moment.</p><p>“Alexander, I -” just as Magnus leans in toward him, not too close, but enough to get an intoxicating whiff of whatever product he uses (sandalwood?), he hears the bellowing laughs of their friends.</p><p>“Sharks! All of them!!” Maia exclaims as she saunters up to the table, a smug looking Simon in tow. “I can’t believe you let me take on this guy -” her laughter halts for a moment as she takes in the buzzing tension that surrounds the two men, Alec hurriedly pulling his hand back into his own personal bubble.</p><p>“Did we interrupt something?” Simon asks, seemingly uncaring of tact.</p><p>“Nonsense, Simon. Come, sit down, tell me which games you hustled poor Maia in, so that we can tell her that she should’ve known.” Magnus sits back up with a smile on his face, the sandalwood scent out of Alec’s reach now. </p><p>The night turns out to be one of the best Alec has had in a while. Now that they had a chance to clear the air and apologize, Alec finds that he gets along well with Magnus. Simon’s also great company (although he has a tendency to ramble when he gets on a roll), and the fact that Maia, who Alec trusts wholeheartedly when it comes to judgement of character, seems to be having a blast is also reassuring. They end up staying out later than he expected; he still needs to get up early for meetings the next day, but he isn’t even grumpy about it. When they finally call it a night and start saying their good-byes, and Alec manages to convince Maia that she doesn’t need to give him a ride and that he can call a car, Magnus perks up.</p><p>“We can carpool, darling,” the endearment slips off his tongue so naturally, and heat curls up deep in Alec’s gut. Before Alec can object, Magnus is shushing him, “I insist! We’re calling a car anyway, and your hotel isn’t far from where Simon and I are staying. It’d be silly to call two cars.”</p><p>He smiles languid and happy - Alec can’t even think to deny him.</p><p> </p><p>To his surprise, when they pull up to the hotel, Magnus asks for the driver to hold on and steps out with Alec. Alec ignores the heat that he feels in his cheeks when he sees Simon’s excited grin (and the thumbs up he shoots Alec when their eyes meet for a brief second).</p><p>“I wanted to thank you for tonight. And I know it’s unorthodox for me to be doing this with my basically-brother in the car watching, but…” he takes a deep breath, “if you’re free tomorrow evening, I would love to take you out for dinner.”</p><p>Alec feels his brain short-circuit. He has a million thoughts running through his mind, none of them translating into words. His shock must be clear on his face, because Magnus raises his hands up, palms facing Alec in a soothing manner.</p><p>“If you’re uncomfortable with the thought, we can invite Maia! Simon isn’t available tomorrow, but it doesn’t have to be a, well, it doesn’t need to be anything. Just dinner,” he stammers out, and Alec finally realizes how nervous Magnus is. It’s the absurd fact that he, Alec Lightwood, can make Magnus nervous that manages to calm him down a bit. While his mouth is still pulled in a tight, thin line, he nods.</p><p>“...is that a yes?” Magnus ventures, uncertain.</p><p>“Yeah…” Alec huffs, and because he’s an idiot who doesn’t know when to stop, he adds in a panic, “just, just a dinner, right? Doesn’t need to be anything…”</p><p>The corners of Magnus’ mouth pulls upward, but the smile doesn’t reach his face. His fingers find his ear cuff again as he speaks, “right, yes. Will… Maia be joining us?”</p><p>“She has plans tomorrow,” he lies without even thinking, and wonders if he’s imagining the relief that floods Magnus’ beautiful eyes.</p><p>“Okay, then,” his voice comes out breathy, and it does things to Alec that he doesn’t want to focus too much on, “I’ll come pick you up tomorrow, then. Does 7pm sound okay?”</p><p>Alec bobs his head a few times silently, not trusting his voice not to crack if he tried to say anything more.</p><p>“I will see you tomorrow,” the spreading smile can be heard in Magnus’ warm voice, a hint of sweetness in the edges, “goodnight, Alexander.”</p><p>“Goodnight, Magnus.”</p><p>He raises his eyes in time to see Magnus get back into the car, which quickly pulls out of the hotel roundabout. Alec is alone again in a bustling city. LA is still full of city sounds even late at night - cars honking, people laughing and shouting in the streets, but Alec can’t hear any of them over the sound of his heartbeat.</p><p> </p><p>*******************</p><p> </p><p>Maia is happy to make fun of him through their entire hike the next day. She starts by commenting on his “heart eyes” and how often the two got lost in their own world. By the time Alec told her about dinner, she’s smacking his arm in faux offense.</p><p>“What am I? Chopped liver? I can’t believe you’re ditching me for dick!” She huffs, but her delight is evident in the way she beams at him.</p><p>Personally, Alec isn’t even sure what to think. Until yesterday, he was convinced he would never see Magnus again. And if he did, he didn’t believe Magnus would want to be friends (is that what they are now?) with him. Even now, he has concerns about what their relationship could become, but if yesterday was any example, he feels a glimmer of hope that it may be salvageable. It helps to hear from Maia, someone who doesn’t know anything about their history, gush about their “undeniable chemistry” (the phrase makes Alec roll his eyes and blush profusely all at once).</p><p>She insists on going back to the hotel with Alec to help him get ready, which takes entirely too long because they end up goofing off and chatting for a chunk of the afternoon. But by the end of it, Maia helps him pick a blue button-up shirt paired with a lightweight black bomber jacket. He wears black jeans and his well-worn boots to complete the look, hoping that Magnus doesn’t plan to take him anywhere too fancy (he should have asked yesterday, but he was too busy being a disaster). She wolf whistles as he steps out of the bathroom, and gives him an enthusiastic thumbs up (Maia and Simon make a hell of a wing-person team, Alec thinks with another exaggerated roll of his eyes).</p><p>“You’re looking 100% dateable, my friend,” she says, bouncing up from where she was resting on Alec’s bed, “if you batted for my team and I didn’t know you, I would totally ask you out!”</p><p>She grins as Alec lets out a half-assed “hey,” in his defense. Alec checks the time, and it’s about 5 min before he’s meant to meet Magnus.</p><p>“You need to leave,” he announces unceremoniously, and Maia cackles in response.</p><p>“That’s how you treat a friend?” Alec smirks at her, knowing how excited she is for him. “Fine, fine! Walk me out. You need to be down there to meet Magnus anyway, right?” She says, pulling on her sneakers as she talks. Alec makes sure he has everything he needs and picks up his keycard and cell phone before turning off the lights.</p><p>They make small talk as they make their way to the hotel lobby, and when the elevator doors open, his eyes immediately find Magnus. The man is rocking gently on his heels, dressed to the nines as usual (not that it means they’re going anywhere fancy - Alec learned quickly that Magnus always dresses to impress). The fact that this breathtakingly beautiful man is in his hotel lobby waiting for <em> him </em> is enough to send him reeling. When Magnus sees the two, for a moment he looks bewildered, and Alec belatedly realizes that Maia’s presence is sending the wrong message.</p><p>“No worries, bud, I’m on my way out. Just helped this one get ready for your <em> date</em>,” Maia wiggles her eyebrows as she calls out to Magnus. Her unwelcome emphasis on the word <em> date </em>doesn’t escape Alec. “He’s hopeless when it comes to dressing himself. All black t-shirts with leather jackets. I’m glad we even managed to find color in his suitcase!”</p><p>Magnus, who has already recovered from his initial surprise and seems completely unfazed by Maia calling their “just dinner” a “date”, laughs good-naturedly, “I can’t really complain when he makes leather jackets over black tees look so good.”</p><p>Alec doesn’t know if he’ll survive this dinner.</p><p>Just as he’s about to tell the two to knock it off, he feels a buzzing in his pocket and is surprised to see his mother’s name on caller ID; it’s way past work hours (especially in New York), and Alec can’t remember the last time his mother called him for personal reasons.</p><p>“I’m sorry, I have to take this,” he mutters a quick apology to his friends and walks to a quiet corner of the lobby before answering the call.</p><p>“Alexander!” Maryse’s panicked voice echoes through the receiver.</p><p>“Mom? What’s wrong? Is everything okay?”</p><p>“It’s Isabelle,” as soon as she says those words, Alec has a sinking feeling that his worst fears are coming to life. “She’s missing.”</p><p>“Missing?” He gasps out, voice hoarse.</p><p>“I got a call from Jia Penhallow… Isabelle never went to the Hamptons with Lydia and Aline. She… she convinced them to cover for her.”</p><p>Maryse’s voice sounds like it’s coming from further and further away. The reality of the situation building a heavy pit in his stomach.</p><p>“They say that the last thing they heard, she was meeting with some, some <em> criminal </em> in Florida,” he can’t recall ever hearing his mother’s voice shake so badly. Not even throughout her divorce.</p><p>“Aldertree,” Alec whispers.</p><p>“Do you know about him?” Maryse sounds too shocked to be angry, but Alec curses beneath his breath. He knows his mother will ask about this later. “Alexander, I need you to come back. Immediately. We need to find Isabelle before she ruins our family.”</p><p>He thinks of Izzy, possibly alone and scared, and his knees suddenly feel too weak to carry his weight. He wants to scream at his mother, who can’t seem to find a maternal bone in her body; worrying about their reputation when her daughter is missing. But his fear for Izzy’s safety takes precedent.</p><p>“I’ll be on the next flight back to New York,” he bites out and hangs up the phone without waiting for her response.</p><p>When he turns back around, he sees Magnus and Maia in what looks like a pleasant conversation. As if Alec’s illusion of safety and happiness, that maybe everything might turn out okay, didn’t just crumble into pieces. Magnus notices him first, and the gleam in his eyes quickly dulls into worry.</p><p>“Is everything okay? You look unwell.”</p><p>Maia follows and rushes to him and leads him to sit down.</p><p>“I… I have to go back to New York. I need to leave tonight,” Alec manages.</p><p>“What? Tonight? Why?” His friend rests a comforting hand on his forearm, but it does little to quell the quickly brewing panic. Since there’s no point in hiding anything from Maia, and he’s done hiding anything from Magnus, he tells them the truth.</p><p>“Izzy is missing. They think she ran away with Aldertree.”</p><p>The shift in Magnus’ stance is immediate and obvious. Maia, whom Alec never shared the whole story with, still looks confused.</p><p>“I’m so sorry, Alexander. I should have told you about him sooner. I knew what he was capable of…” Magnus starts, bitterness ringing through every word. Alec shakes his head to stop him.</p><p>“No, I should have told her about him after Boston… I should have been honest with her… and now…”</p><p>The two men look at each other, unsure of what else to say. Magnus is the first to look away.</p><p>“It sounds like dinner will have to wait. I’m sure you have plenty to prepare for before you leave. I’ll leave you to it.”</p><p>He turns without saying another word, and before Alec can even ask him to wait, he hears Magnus’ deep voice rumble,</p><p>“Goodbye, Alexander.”</p><p> </p><p>If he allowed himself any hope before, he hears it shatter along with his heart.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Sorry for the cliffhanger…! We’re all set up for the climax, though, and we’re only a few chapters away.</p><p>I hope you enjoyed the chapter - if you did, a comment or a kudos is always appreciated. All your feedback for this fic truly make my day. I'm so grateful for each and every one of you who read and enjoy this story. Thanks for sticking with me even when the boys were being stupid! haha</p><p>On that note, until next week!</p><p>tsujiharu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. The Lightwoods - reprise -</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Nervous energy permeates through the Lightwood home. Maryse paces through the kitchen like she doesn’t know what to do with the excess energy she feels; heels clicking with every step she takes, slowly grating away at Alec’s patience. The rustle of Jace’s jeans rubbing against the sofa as he nervously jiggles his leg doesn’t help. Jace’s shoulders are rigid and his hands rub up and down his thighs. Max sits on the sofa across from Jace, curled up into a silent ball. Other than the huge hug he gave Alec when he got home, he hasn’t moved from where he sits.</p><p>***</p><p>Izzy is missing, and Alec has just about had it with his mother.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Friday! I’m sorry to miss yet another week, but I am back with another chapter! We’re entering the climax, and it’s time to right some wrongs…<br/>I hope you enjoy the chapter!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Nervous energy permeates through the Lightwood home. Maryse paces through the kitchen like she doesn’t know what to do with the excess energy she feels; heels clicking with every step she takes, slowly grating away at Alec’s patience. The rustle of Jace’s jeans rubbing against the sofa as he nervously jiggles his leg doesn’t help. Jace’s shoulders are rigid and his hands rub up and down his thighs. Max sits on the sofa across from Jace, curled up into a silent ball. Other than the huge hug he gave Alec when he got home, he hasn’t moved from where he sits. The air is stale, and while they all are present in the same room worrying for the same thing, somehow it almost feels even more isolating than the hours he had to stew alone on the flight home. Alec grits his teeth, jaw clenching as he tries to pull his thoughts together.</p><p>“Tell me again,” he says, and his mother huffs a frustrated sigh.</p><p>“Alec, how many times can I tell you this?” She groans, “she didn’t come home when she was supposed to, when I couldn’t get a hold of her, I called Jia Penhallow, who spoke with Aline. Her phone went straight to voicemail when any of us tried to contact her, at which point Aline and Lydia told us the truth.”</p><p>She goes through the story methodically, as if she was tired of telling it. More annoyed than worried.</p><p>“And they’re sure she’s with Aldertree?” He confirms.</p><p>“Yes! And god knows where they’ve disappeared to! The girls said they mentioned Florida - Florida! Can you believe it?! I knew I shouldn’t have been so lenient with her. What if she ends up… arrested? Homeless? Soliciting?! Whatever drug addicts do these days!” She spits out bitterly, as if the words themselves are dirty. “I thought those girls would be trustworthy! What on earth were they thinking? Their parents should be ashamed of themselves!”</p><p>Alec sees Max tense from the corner of his eyes. A heavy pit sinks deep in his stomach, thinking of his youngest brother having to be exposed to his mother’s delusions on a daily basis.</p><p>“Mother,” he tries, his voice gentle and placating. His mother is having none of it.</p><p>“Don’t <em> Mother </em> me!” She growls, “I can’t believe she would do something so stupid! That she would do this to our family!”</p><p>“Is that really all you care about?” Alec can’t help how his voice rises, and how it cracks with the anger he feels, “our reputation? We’re barely keeping it together as it is, Mom!”</p><p>Jace and Max look up now, shocked at Alec’s unexpected outburst. Nervous eyes dart between Maryse and her eldest son. Maryse doesn’t move a single muscle, glaring at Alec with fiery eyes.</p><p>It’s a moment that Alec recognizes; he’s been in this exact moment time and time again, he knows he can back down. He can take a deep breath and reel it in, just like he always has. Tell himself that his mother just won’t get it, it’s just the way she is, and give in. His eyes flit from Maryse to Jace to Max, who’s uncurled himself, arm on the back of the sofa and head perked up. He watches Alec with sad, curious eyes. Alec wonders how many times Max saw him just like this in these moments and how many times he saw Alec give in. What did Max see every time? He thinks of Izzy - missing. His loving, brilliant sister who always stood with Alec when he needed her. Stifled by the controlling reign of their troubled mother.</p><p>And that is where the question lies - is this really who their mother is?</p><p>It’s only a moment, but it feels like it stretches for eternity. And as if an invisible thread has been cut - Alec knows that everything’s changed.</p><p>“Do you not see it?” He asks. His voice is quiet again, a slight tremble is the only sign of emotion, “she’s tried so hard to please you all her life, but you never even bother to see her accomplishments. Have you ever stopped to think <em> why </em> Izzy started butting heads with you more and more?” He sees Maryse’s jaw tick as she swallows. She’s visibly livid, but Alec forges on before he can think better of it.</p><p>“You try to control every part of our lives, push us to be better without acknowledging everything we’ve already achieved. Izzy is at the top of her class in Columbia - she got an internship at the NYPD crime lab that she’s been working her ass off at. Jace runs the security office at the firm so efficiently that we haven’t had to call the police a single time since he’s taken over. He’s reliable and so loyal that I swear he’s stupid enough to take a bullet for either us if he needs to. Max is working on so many extracurriculars that he practically worked through his entire summer break without <em> ever </em> complaining - not to mention he’s the one who holds this family together. Would it pain you so much to perhaps mention how <em> proud </em>you are of your kids? Or does that thought never occur to you?</p><p>“And maybe Izzy made a mistake - maybe she trusted the wrong person. But what about her safety? Shouldn’t we first try to get her home safely and then help her recover? What if she’s in danger? What if she’s scared, Mom? She’s still just a kid, we’re supposed to protect her!” His eyes start stinging with heat (fuck, since when is he so emotional?), but he pushes on, “screw our ‘reputation’, it’s already in the gutter anyway.”</p><p>“Alexander!” Maryse interrupts, but Alec shuts her down just as fast.</p><p>“No! Our family is associated with hate and bigotry. Our firm defends the worst of the crop as long as they pay, and everyone knows it! There’s no world where protecting <em> that </em> is more important than Izzy. Izzy needs her mother, and if you can’t be that, then don’t even bother. I’ll find her myself,” he finishes, his voice a lot more firm than he thought it would be. His breathing is a bit ragged, but he feels surprisingly light - a heavy weight lifted off his back. He takes a moment to calm his breath and straightens out his posture.</p><p>Max’s eyes are as wide as saucers, and Alec notes the edges of Jace’s mouth twitch as he tries to suppress an inappropriate smile. He pauses only for a moment before tilting his head toward the front door.</p><p>“I’m going home. Jace, you coming?”</p><p>“Hell yeah,” Jace says without skipping a beat.</p><p>“Max?” Alec asks next, kind and unassuming. Max will always have a choice as long as Alec can help it.</p><p>“I…” he gulps a mouthful of air, still seeming dazed by everything that just went down, “I wanna stay over at your place.”</p><p>Alec smiles at him, trying to keep his features soft, despite the slowly surfacing panic he feels, “sounds good. Pack an overnight bag.” Max jumps up off the couch and runs up the stairs to his room.</p><p>“Alexander,” Maryse tries again, quieter this time.</p><p>“I don’t think we’ll agree on this one, Mother. I think it’s best we take the evening to calm down, and I’ll come by again tomorrow evening with Max. I’ll work on finding some leads on Izzy. Have you called the police?”</p><p>Maryse opens her mouth, like she’s about to make a flimsy excuse as to why she hasn’t called the police after knowing her daughter’s been missing for close to a day, but seems to think better of it and just shakes her head. Alec knows it’s going to be a tough sell; Izzy’s friends will attest to the fact that she left with Aldertree voluntarily, but he can’t just sit on his ass all night, so he nods.</p><p>“I’ll give it a try when I get home.”</p><p>As soon as Max rushes back in with a packed backpack, the brothers head out, leaving their speechless mother behind.</p><p><em> Maybe it was always going to end this way</em>.</p><p>A sharp pain throbs in Alec’s chest as he lets the thought settle. There’s guilt. He can’t help but think he shouldn’t have yelled, or he should’ve yelled louder, or he should’ve talked to her sooner, all the countless other <em> what if </em> s (but strangely, none of them involve <em> not </em> saying those things to her, which is an oddly comforting thought). And as the panic slowly abates and shifts into a mild swirl of anxiety in his stomach, he wonders to himself if their family will ever be alright again.</p><p> </p><p>********************</p><p> </p><p>Alec is restless all night. Jace stays up with him making calls to the police, and getting nowhere. He manages to get a hold of Lydia, who insists she doesn’t know any details and just thought she was doing a friend a favor. He considers going down to Florida, but doesn’t even know where to begin. Jace reaches out to some contacts at the NYPD, and while they can’t do anything since her last known whereabouts is out of state, they agree to run a few checks on her credit card activity as well as her phone usage on the downlow. By the end of the night they land on the idea of trying to hire someone to find her. While they’re both skeptical and far too worried to get a good night’s sleep, they try to get a few hours of rest.</p><p> </p><p>By morning, Alec is feeling no better rested, and he feels at a loss for next steps. He pours himself a cup of coffee in the kitchen where Jace silently scrolls through his phone.</p><p>“I think all we can do is wait at this point…” Jace mutters, dejected. He sounds as exhausted as Alec feels, nursing a large cup of black coffee. “My contacts say that they’ll call if they get a hit on anything, but if Aldertree’s pulled this shit before, he may know the drill. Could’ve covered their tracks as he went.”</p><p>At the sound of soft footsteps, the brothers look up to find Max standing in the doorway. He looks weary, shoulders slumped and a worried crease between his brows. He doesn’t make eye contact with either Alec or Jace as he stands there, not making a move to come in. A sick feeling twists in Alec’s gut.</p><p>“You okay, Max?”</p><p>He stands there silently for a while, eyes glassy and unfocused. When he finally starts speaking, his voice is barely a whisper, “...do you think she did it on purpose?”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Izzy… do you think she wanted to leave us?” He says it louder this time, but his voice cracks at the end as he tries so hard not to let his emotions overflow.</p><p>“Max, no,” Alec runs over to his brother, hunched over, looking like the child he is. He always carries himself so confidently, mature for his age; Alec sometimes forgets that he’s still just a kid. He pulls him in close, finding comfort for himself in the way his brother hugs back.</p><p>“She’s been fighting so much with Mom,” Max whimpers into his shoulder, “I told her to knock it off, and… and she yelled at me. Izzy’s never yelled at me. What if, what if I pushed her away? Made her decide to leave?” His shoulders start shaking once he gets the words out, and Alec holds him tighter.</p><p>“No, Max. It wasn’t you, okay? That wasn’t Izzy talking. She made some bad decisions, and maybe it made her lash out, but we know Izzy. You know her. She would never leave you like that. She would hate to see you so worried.”</p><p>Jace walks over and places a hand on Max’s back, “Alec’s right. Izzy thinks the world of you - she loves all of us. So we’re going to trust her, and find her before anything bad can happen, okay kid?”</p><p>Max nods, grumbling, “‘m not a kid” between huffs of breaths. The tiny sense of normalcy in such surreal times brings a faint smile to Alec’s face.</p><p>“I’ll make some breakfast,” Jace walks back to the counter, “why don’t you two wait in the living room and I’ll bring it out.”</p><p>Alec nods in thanks and guides Max to the sofa. They sit down at opposite ends, and while Max still seems a bit dazed and teary, he seems to have regained control of his breathing.</p><p>“Feeling better?” Alec asks.</p><p>“Yeah, sorry,” his brother’s cheeks are flushed pink - either from all the emotion or from the embarrassment of crying in front of his big brothers, but he manages a small uptick of his lips.</p><p>“No need to apologize. We’re all worried about her.”</p><p>“...can I ask you something?” Max starts up again in a careful tone.</p><p>“What’s up?”</p><p>“Was Izzy doing drugs?”</p><p>Alec should have expected the question, especially coming from Max who’s been living with Izzy the entirety of her knowing Victor. But he never thought to prepare an answer. He looks at Max with wide eyes as he tries to come up with the right thing to say.</p><p>“She… she got caught up with the wrong crowd,” is what slips out.</p><p>“That’s what they always say,” Max scoffs.</p><p>“We all make mistakes, Max.”</p><p>The two hold each other’s gazes, silence spreading between them. The hissing sounds of something cooking in oil drifts into the room, filling the space instead. Max finally shifts his eyes out the window, beyond the balcony.</p><p>“She wasn’t acting like herself, Alec… she was different. Scary, sometimes.”</p><p>Alec nods solemnly. “These things rarely ever impact just the one person,” a pained sigh slips through his lips, “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you more, through all of this.”</p><p>Max doesn’t respond to that; he continues to stare far out the window, unfocused.</p><p>“I just want Izzy back. <em> Our </em> Izzy.”</p><p>They sit there in silence, the smell of eggs and bacon wafting into the living room as if it’s any other Saturday morning. After a few tense minutes, Jace comes in with three plates of food, and the Lightwood brothers eat in silence, mentally planning out their next steps.</p><p> </p><p>************************</p><p> </p><p>It’s mid-afternoon when Alec gets the call. He’s sitting in the living room with Jace, Max is resting in the guest room, tired out from the emotions of the morning. The coffee from their second pot of the day has long gone cold and stale, but neither have made a move to clear it from the table. The call is from an unknown number, something Alec wouldn’t normally answer, but today he doesn’t hesitate.</p><p>“Alec?”</p><p>He immediately recognizes the watery voice on the other end of the call and practically jumps off the sofa.</p><p>“Izzy? Is that you?”</p><p>Jace’s eyes widen in alarm, but before he can say anything Alec points a finger at him, wordlessly asking him to stay quiet. He barely hears a soft huff of air that sounds like a silent sob through the noise of the crowds on the other end of the line. He stays quiet until he hears a small whimper, “I’m so sorry, Alec. I fucked up so bad…”</p><p>“Hey, hey,” he tries to stay calm while his mind is running a mile a minute, “it’s okay, it’s okay. Are you safe? Where are you?”</p><p>“I’m safe… I’m at the airport in Miami,” she sniffs, “I’m so sorry, Alec, you must all be so mad. I should have listened…!”</p><p>Alec shushes his sister gently, trying to calm her as her breathing grows erratic. “It’s okay, Iz. We’re all worried, and we want you home. I’m just relieved to hear your voice.”</p><p>“I fucked up…” she chokes out.</p><p>“And we’ll try to fix it together, once you’re home. We just want you home, Iz,” he assures her, tender but firm.</p><p>“I should have listened. You… you tried to stop me.”</p><p>“It’s okay,”</p><p>“No, it isn’t…! Vi- Victor… he…”</p><p>“Did he hurt you?” Izzy makes a small whine in the negative, and some of the tension bleeds out of Alec’s shoulders. “Are you able to come home? Do you need us to come get you?”</p><p>“N - no, I’m okay. We have flights to go back soon. We’re actually waiting by the gates now,”</p><p>“<em>We</em>?”</p><p>“Right... um… please don’t tell him I told you, he asked me not to…” she mutters, clearly conflicted, but Alec waits patiently, “Magnus found me.”</p><p>Alec freezes, all the noise surrounding Izzy turns into static as he tries to make sense of what his sister just said.</p><p>“...Magnus Bane?”</p><p>“Yeah… he, he um, came here with Simon? They said they knew Victor from years ago.”</p><p>
  <em> Magnus went to find Izzy? </em>
</p><p>“But Magnus found us a flight, and we’re heading back to New York soon. I… can I stay with you tonight, Alec? I don’t think I can face Mom tonight…” The desperation in Izzy’s voice is clear, and Alec can’t blame her for not wanting to face Maryse just yet.</p><p>“Of course. I’ll have Jace and Max stay with Mom tonight. It’ll just be the two of us, okay?” He says, fighting the desire to ask her for more details on Magnus finding her.</p><p>“Okay. Thank you, Alec… I love you,” Izzy sniffles.</p><p>“I love you too. You’re sure you’re safe?” He asks one last time.</p><p>“Yes, Magnus and Simon have been nothing but kind...” she says timidly, her voice making it clear she doesn’t think she deserves it.</p><p>“Good,” he exhales, still wincing at the sound of Magnus’ name. He suggests picking her up at the airport, but Izzy declines saying that Magnus has taken care of that as well. It seems he’s taken care of everything. <em> But why? </em> is the question that keeps circulating in his mind.</p><p>After saying their final goodbyes with a final reminder to call him for anything at all, he hangs up the phone and melts back into the sofa. Jace is on him like a hawk with a litany of questions.</p><p>“What the fuck, Alec! That was Izzy? She’s safe? She’s coming back? And what was that about Magnus Bane?!”</p><p>Alec cradles his face in his hands for a moment, trying to put his thoughts back together.</p><p>“Let me talk to her tonight, Jace. Once I get more information, we’ll all figure it out. But I think it’s best if we ease her into this. Give her space tonight, just the two of us.”</p><p>Jace looks less than pleased with the idea, arguing a little, but he knows that Izzy’s always been more vulnerable with Alec, and that taking her to see their mother immediately was out of the question. So after a small amount of griping, he relents. They immediately start calling Jace’s contacts they called last night to thank them and let them know that Izzy was found, and they update Max as soon as he gets up. They decide it would be best for Jace and Max to inform Maryse, and they can only hope she won’t come charging into Alec and Jace’s place to interrogate Izzy until she’s ready to go to her.</p><p>“I’ll keep her at home,” Jace promises.</p><p>Once they’ve come up with a game plan, Jace and Max head out. Max gives Alec another tight hug on his way out, and Alec can feel the relief flooding out of his small body. It makes Alec realize how much stress and pain Max had been retaining every time he absorbed it from others. He gives his youngest brother one last squeeze.</p><p>“We’ll see you soon, alright? Izzy and me.” He only lets go when Max nods his understanding.</p><p> </p><p>With his brothers out of the apartment, Alec has plenty of time to let his own thoughts fester. So naturally, he stresses out.</p><p>He paces as he lets his thoughts wander. Now that he knows for certain that Izzy is safe, he allows himself to get distracted for the first time in days. As if it’s the most natural thing, his thoughts go straight to Magnus. Magnus must have started looking as soon as Alec told him on Thursday, otherwise how could he ever have gotten there and found her so quickly? Perhaps he’s been keeping tabs on the man, or he must know his associates. He wonders what it might mean. Magnus has expressed feelings of guilt for not revealing Victor’s history sooner, so is he trying to make up for what he feels are his errors? Or, in a moment of hopefulness Alec allows himself to wonder, could it be that he did it because he cares? For Alec? He shakes the thought off as soon as it occurs to him. Alec’s burnt that bridge to ashes more than enough times already, and it would be ridiculous to think Magnus would ever consider him in that light again. After all, he was the one who told him there was <em> no way </em> he would ever want to be with Magnus, he reminds himself grimly.</p><p>He draws his attention back to Izzy and all the questions he needs to ask to make sure she’s okay. He spends the remainder of the afternoon and early evening channeling his anxiety into productivity, looking up resources for his sister and various ways they can support her as a family. Thankfully, this research distracts him for the rest of the time he has until Izzy gets home.</p><p>He only looks up from his computer when he hears the lock turn, and he darts up from where he sits at the sofa, realizing for the first time that it’s gotten dark outside - the lights of the neighboring buildings flickering across the city. Alec’s at the door before it opens slowly and he sees Izzy’s dark hair timidly pop in before anything else.</p><p>“Izzy,” his body releases the final dregs of tension he was carrying when he finally gets a hold of her eyes. They’re bloodshot with dark rims, she looks exhausted and scared, but she’s <em> home </em>. Alec pulls her straight into his arms before she even closes the door; Izzy, in turn, seems hesitant at first but eventually brings her arms up to cling to her brother.</p><p>“I’m so sorry, Alec,” she sniffles into his ear.</p><p>“Just glad you’re home, Iz” he replies. He grabs her luggage and gently leads her to the living room, sitting her down on the sofa once they get there. “Do you want some tea or something?”</p><p>“Tea would be nice, thank you.” Alec busies himself in the kitchen boiling water while he listens to Izzy nervously shuffling on the couch. Once the kettle is on he moves back to sit down next to her, trying to smile encouragingly.</p><p>“I’m not mad,” he reminds her, “all I wanted was to have you back safely, and we can worry about everything else together just like I said before, okay?”</p><p>His sister nods, but her eyes shift uncomfortably, landing everywhere in the room but on him. After finally settling on the window (looking so much like Max had only a day ago), she finally starts speaking.</p><p>“He, he knew I had a week off of work, and he said that I should visit him,” she begins, her voice meek, “I told him Mom would never agree, and he helped me come up with a cover story. But, but when I got there he -”</p><p>Alec can’t help the anger that starts to bubble up, but he tries to keep his voice even, “what did he do, Izzy?”</p><p>“He took my phone and wallet. He said it was to keep Mom off our tail, and that he’d take care of everything… God I was so <em> stupid</em>! Alec, I’m so sorry. I was just so… so angry. I knew it was a bad idea, but I didn’t think. Victor never acted like that before, and… I didn’t know,” she starts sobbing, her hands hovering over her face, and Alec feels his heart break in his chest.</p><p>“I know, Izzy, he fooled all of us. He targeted you. It isn’t your fault.”</p><p>“No, you don’t understand, I… I lied to you…! There’s still something… something I haven’t told you.” She whispers through heaving breaths, voice heavy with guilt, and Alec shuffles over the small space between them to hug his sister. She leans into his embrace, burying her face in his shoulder.</p><p>“I know,” he says.</p><p>“What?” Izzy looks up with wide, terrified eyes</p><p>“I know about the Yinfen, and it’s okay. We’ll figure it out.” He tries to keep his voice warm, “You’re my sister, Iz, I love you. Nothing’s going to change that.”</p><p>She starts crying for real after that, and it takes a few moments before her breathing begins to even out. Alec keeps whispering into her ear that it’s all going to be okay, and that she’s safe now. He hears the kettle click, and peers into Izzy’s face to see if she’s okay. She sniffles as she separates herself from Alec’s t-shirt and wipes her eyes with her own long sleeves. She gives him a weak smile, which is enough encouragement for him to stand up.</p><p>He tries to keep his anger toward Victor at bay, comforting Izzy being the current priority - but once he’s in the kitchen alone, he can’t help the rage that simmers at the bottom of stomach. He distracts himself by preparing the tea. In the other room, Izzy seems like she’s collected herself enough to start speaking again. She raises her voice a little so it travels through the two rooms.</p><p>“He offered me Yinfen at the beginning of my trip, and… I wasn’t keeping track of how much he was giving me,” she bites out, shame ringing clearly in her words, “it, it was too much, and I was just really out of it the whole time. I didn’t know what was happening when Magnus found us.”</p><p>Alec almost drops the mug when he unexpectedly hears Magnus’ name, but manages to recover without making a scene. He brings the tea back to the living room and hands it to his sister.</p><p>“He found me yesterday, but,” she releases a shuddering exhale, “but I was too out of it. I couldn’t call you. Couldn’t talk to you like that. Magnus and Simon took me from Victor, and helped me until I was… better. I called you as soon as I had a chance.”</p><p>He nods as she tells the story, as if it’s something that’s been told to her. His stomach clenches, wondering what sort of state Izzy was in when Magnus found her.</p><p>“...and Aldertree?” He almost wants to take it back when he sees Izzy flinch at his name, but he needs to know.</p><p>“...Magnus took care of him. He, he assured me that Victor won’t be hurting anyone else anytime soon. It sounds like he knows a lot of Victor’s, um, friends, who are willing to speak against him,” she explains vaguely.</p><p>He can feel the satisfaction unfurl inside him. Knowing what Victor did to Simon and how Magnus regretted letting him get off lightly years ago, Alec gets the sense that Magnus was going to be thorough in his punishment this time around. They sit in silence for a bit as Izzy sips her tea.</p><p>“Mom’s got to be livid,” she mutters after a while, seemingly resigned to the fact.</p><p>“You won’t have to face her alone if she is,” Alec reminds her.</p><p>“I’m going to start going to meetings,” is her response, and it takes Alec by surprise.</p><p>“Meetings?”</p><p>“NA meetings. I don’t want to be this person anymore. I never wanted to be this person. And I’m so sorry, Alec. I never should’ve let it get this bad… I thought, I thought I had it under control. Just a little for the stress. Just to forget my troubles for a bit… It was never supposed to be like this,” her voice quivers and tears well up in her eyes, threatening to overflow again.</p><p>He places a comforting hand on Izzy’s shoulder, “I’m proud of you for recognizing that and taking steps to fix it, Iz. That isn’t easy.”</p><p>She scoffs, “I’m a mess, Alec. I don’t deserve that.”</p><p>“Lucky for you, this isn’t up to you,” he smiles, and it feels a lot more sincere than the other smiles he’s been plastering on all night in his clumsy attempts to comfort his sister.</p><p>They start talking about next steps; her internship, NA meetings, and the possibility of seeking out counseling. Alec wasn’t sure if Izzy would be open to the idea of therapy, but he’s surprised when she agrees that it may be helpful.</p><p>They are still seated on the couch, Izzy opening up as she feels comfortable, and Alec providing the support that his sister is finally ready to accept, when the phone in Izzy’s pocket starts to buzz. She startles, but instantly relaxes when she sees the name on the screen.</p><p>“It’s Simon, he said he would check in on me. I have to take this,” she stands up, looking apologetic. Alec just smiles and watches her retreat to the guest room. He’s surprised to hear that Simon is checking in on his sister, but realizes that if anyone could understand what she’s currently going through, it’s him. So while Izzy is off talking to Simon, Alec decides to pass the time looking into what happened to Victor.</p><p>A quick records search of the Miami Police Department shows that Victor Aldertree was arrested on counts of drug possession, distribution, and trafficking. It looks like he was arrested while trying to get away; the arrest record shows a DUI, assault of a police officer, as well as breaking and entering. Just based on what Izzy has told him, Alec gets the sense that Victor’s done something similar before, and if so, he thinks Magnus will know about it and use it against him. With that and his prior record in mind, there’s a good chance that he’ll have to do serious time.</p><p><em> Good</em>. Relief floods through Alec, knowing that Victor will most likely not be able to hurt anyone again.</p><p>Eventually Izzy pokes her head back in, but only to tell Alec that she’s headed to bed. He follows suit soon after, drained from the day’s events. He wakes to hear her just once in the middle of the night, pacing around the living room restlessly. When he checks in on her,  she looks haggard, borderline maniacal as she bites her nails while her body shivers. Her eyes wide and dull. She assures him she’s okay and he can go back to sleep; Alec wraps her up in a blanket and hugs her tight until she stops shaking instead, then walks her back to the guest room. But it’s when he finds her curled up on the sofa in the morning that it really sinks in that his sister is an addict, and she’ll need all the support and love that her family can give her through her recovery.</p><p> </p><p>************************</p><p> </p><p>When Alec asks Jace how Maryse is doing, all he would say is that she won’t speak to them. So when Alec brings Izzy home on Sunday afternoon, it’s safe to say he is expecting the worst. He’s never lost his temper at his mother the way he did on Friday, and while he doesn’t regret a single thing he said to her, he’s worried that it will overshadow the care that Izzy needs right now. Izzy has been looking green and sickly all morning, and Alec can’t tell if it’s from the withdrawals she’s still experiencing or the nerves of facing their mother’s wrath.</p><p>“On a scale of one to Dad leaving to be with his secretary, how mad is she?” She asks, fidgeting and messing with her meticulously straightened hair. Alec rolls his eyes and ignores the inappropriate joke, knowing how scared she’s actually feeling.</p><p>“I don’t know, Iz. Jace says she hasn’t said a word to them since he brought Max back yesterday. Either way, I’m right here with you. Every step of the way, okay? And if she’s going to be a problem, then you come stay with us for a while.”</p><p>Izzy looks up at him with watery eyes, she looks uncertain and terrified, but she nods.</p><p>“Izzy!!”</p><p>Max is the first to greet them when they enter. He runs up to her right at the door and swings his arms around her in a hug. Alec tries to give them some privacy, greeting Jace as Izzy whispers into Max’s ears. From his peripheral vision, he can see Max relax into the embrace - as if the stress is just pouring out of his body. Jace follows once Izzy and Max go quiet, wrapping his strong arms around both his younger siblings. They all pull apart eventually, Izzy sporting a timid smirk, a lot more relaxed than she had seemed outside. Alec watches the three of them with a gentle smile on his face, which quickly dissipates when he hears footfalls behind him.</p><p>“Mom,” he turns to greet her coldly.</p><p>The look Maryse returns is unreadable, putting Alec on edge. Instinctively, he finds himself stepping between his siblings and his mother. She tilts her head so that she can see past him, where Jace protectively curls his arm around Izzy’s shoulder. He can feel the weight of their fractured family suspended in mid-air. The five of them frozen in a standstill, as if a single move might finally drop and shatter what’s left of them. When their mother takes a step toward Izzy, Alec almost stops her. But Maryse moves with smooth determination and gently pulls her daughter into her arms.</p><p>A muffled gasp escapes Izzy as she slips out of Jace’s arm, but then silence falls over the room. The boys watch, stunned, as Maryse runs her hand over Izzy’s hair in soft strokes, over and over and over… and then the silence is broken by muted sobs. Izzy’s shoulders shake in her mother’s arms, and Maryse shushes her soothingly.</p><p>“I’m so sorry,” Izzy heaves between breaths, and Maryse keeps petting her hair.</p><p>“I know, I know, Isabelle…” she whispers into her ear, voice thin and watery herself, “I am too.”</p><p>And Alec knows it’s entirely too soon to tell, but he thinks he sees a glimpse of his old mother in this Maryse. This Maryse who hugs the daughter she almost lost so tightly, without a care in the world that Izzy’s tears and make up will smear on her designer dress.</p><p>He needs to look away when he feels the (now familiar) heat of tears behind his own eyes, but in this one beautiful moment - punctuated with tender words of care and wet cries, he thinks that maybe everything will be alright.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Alec standing up to Maryse was pretty damn satisfying to write. Haha<br/>Thank you as always to all of you for reading/leaving kudos/commenting/bookmarking. As someone still pretty new to fic-writing, I am honestly floored by the support this story has gotten, and I don’t have the words to tell you all how much it means to me.<br/>Your comments and feedback never fail to make me smile, so please go ahead and leave me a comment if you feel so inclined!</p><p>Only two more chapters and an epilogue to go! :)</p><p>tsujiharu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Something Even Better</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The early September sun casts a warm glow on the balcony. Jace, Izzy, and Alec each sit comfortably in their own deck chairs, sharing a quiet Saturday afternoon. Izzy with soda water in one hand and a heavy textbook in another, Jace sips from his iced coffee while scrolling through his phone, and Alec does the same while reading through case files. The soft but incessant scribbles of Izzy taking notes in the margins of her textbook blend with the engine noises and shouting that is distinctly “New York”, drifting up from the streets below them. It’s been a couple of weeks since they got Izzy back, and they managed to settle into a comfortable rhythm.</p><p>***</p><p>As things are going back to normal, the Lightwoods get an unexpected visitor.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Friday, everyone! I’m here with a happy chapter, to (hopefully) brighten up your Friday a bit :)<br/>Enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The early September sun casts a warm glow on the balcony. Jace, Izzy, and Alec each sit comfortably in their own deck chairs, sharing a quiet Saturday afternoon. Izzy with soda water in one hand and a heavy textbook in another, Jace sips from his iced coffee while scrolling through his phone, and Alec does the same while reading through case files. The soft but incessant scribbles of Izzy taking notes in the margins of her textbook blend with the engine noises and shouting that is distinctly “New York”, drifting up from the streets below them. It’s been a couple of weeks since they got Izzy back, and they managed to settle into a comfortable rhythm.</p><p>As Alec expected, their mother didn’t just change overnight, but the siblings could all tell that she was trying. Not just in the half-assed way that Alec had come to accept as “she’s doing the best she can”, but actually making an effort to be different. It started small. With Alec and Jace visiting the home more often since Izzy returned, they’ve had more chances for family dinners. What normally is an occasion for stilted conversation carried by two or three members have slowly begun to include the whole family. Maryse asks questions about her children’s lives, tells a few stories from her schooling days to relate to Max or Izzy. She asks Jace and Alec about their work. While her first attempts were far from comfortable, they all eventually fell into a stride of sharing about their days.</p><p>Even at work Alec notices a shift in demeanor. Maryse began involving him more in her decision making process. He’s sat in more strategy meetings within the last week than he has in the last few years he’s spent at the firm. They’ve also begun having discussions on clients they represent, and to Alec’s surprise, Maryse has been open to the idea of introducing pro bono opportunities or sliding scale payment options for clients. Nothing was going to change immediately, but he can’t help but feel hopeful when his mother, for the first time in years, is facing her children with respect and an open mind. Maryse is a proud woman and Alec is fairly certain she’ll never openly discuss her change in attitude, but the adjustments she’s already made have been more than he had ever expected, so Alec is willing to take those tiny steps with her.</p><p> </p><p>A series of extra loud honks brings Alec back from his thoughts. Izzy pulls her sunglasses down to the tip of her nose and peers over the balcony railing to look down at the commotion. Their sister has been doing as good as any of them could have hoped. They’ve been spending a lot more time together since Izzy made the choice to pull out from the rest of her internship (“just finally prioritizing my health,” she explained, but he still remembers the pained look on her face as she made the call). She’s come down to the office to eat lunch with her siblings during the week or would spend days keeping busy with Max, mending their strained relationship. She stays over at Jace and Alec’s place on nights she feels she needs the extra support or company, or when she attends a late night NA meeting and the condo is closer than home. School is starting back up next week, and Alec gets the sense she’s looking forward to having more distractions.</p><p>It also doesn’t escape Alec that she’s been spending a lot of time on the phone with Simon. Unexpectedly, Magnus’ friend seems to have become a valuable pillar in Izzy’s support system. He supposes it isn’t too surprising when he thinks about it, considering their specific shared experiences. Alec doesn’t know how to feel about it at first - there’s a strange, selfish part of him that feels jealous. As if Izzy’s somehow connected to Magnus and he’s stuck on the sidelines (he refuses to inspect that thought too closely). And sure, while they never got around to exchanging contact information, it would be easy enough for Alec to reach out through social media or a mutual connection. Magnus spends plenty of time in New York, but Alec’s yet to get over the fear of rejection that takes over every time he thinks of taking action.</p><p>“An Uber holding up traffic,” Izzy explains the noises that seem to have dwindled now, but then recognition crosses her face. She squints and kneels on her chair to get a better look below. “...is that…?”</p><p>She turns back to the brothers with surprise evident in her eyes.</p><p>“What?” Jace asks gruffly, his brows furrowed in question. </p><p>“I’m pretty sure I just saw…” Izzy doesn’t get to finish her sentence before the intercom buzzes.</p><p>Alec narrows his eyes as he stands up, “you expecting anyone, Jace?” Jace shakes his head. Izzy covers her mouth with her hand, clearly deciding whether or not to say anything. Since she hasn’t come out and said it, Alec goes to answer the buzzer.</p><p>“Hello?”</p><p>“Alec?” He sees the fiery red through the camera before he hears the nervous voice, “hi, it’s Clary.”</p><p> </p><p>******************</p><p> </p><p>The room is so quiet you could hear a pin drop. The rustle from Jace’s nervous leg jittering is the only sound that cuts through the heavy silence. They’ve relocated to the living room, Jace has taken a recliner across from the sectional where Clary and Magnus sit; Clary looks nervous - shifting her weight every now and then, eyes darting toward Magnus as if asking for help. Magnus, on the other hand, is purposefully not looking at the redhead, his eyes pointed toward an apparently very interesting stain on the ceiling. Alec watches from the doorway to the kitchen, trying to figure out whatever the fuck is happening right now. Thankfully, they have Izzy. From her corner of the sectional, she perks up.</p><p>“So. Clary, how long are you here for this time?” She asks, as friendly as ever. Clary’s shoulders sag in obvious relief at the cheerful voice. It’s obvious she wasn’t expecting any allies in this endeavor.</p><p>“I need to be back next week, with school starting,” her eyes flicker toward Jace uncertainly for a moment before turning back to Izzy. Izzy hums in acknowledgement and they continue with some labored small talk (mainly because the men in the room were giving them absolutely nothing to work with), and when Alec can tell it’s just about to die out he sees Magnus roll his eyes.</p><p>“Biscuit,” he nudges her with his shoulder.</p><p>Clary blushes a bright pink, “okay, I know,” she mutters, chin tucked and eyes lowered. Alec and Izzy watch her, fascinated, as she visibly musters the courage to speak up.</p><p>“Jace?” She looks straight at the blond when she looks back up. Jace stops his fidgeting for the first time since they sat down, and suddenly the room feels too quiet. They all stare at the two, waiting for the next move as if they were watching the climax to a movie. “Can we talk?”</p><p>Jace glares into the space between the two, shoulders rigid, eyes guarded. Alec feels a flare of defensiveness for his brother, even knowing the motivation behind Clary’s past actions.</p><p>“Now you want to talk?” There’s a coldness in his voice that he’s sure Clary has never heard before. She flinches, but to her credit doesn’t back down. She sits up straight and keeps her bright green eyes trained on Jace.</p><p>“Jace, I’ve been a complete ass, and… and if you’d let me, I want to apologize and explain myself.”</p><p>Alec doesn’t miss the way his brother’s mismatched eyes quiver when he finally looks up at Clary. He releases a long exhale.</p><p>“Fine… okay,” he says with a barely-there tremble in his voice. He stands up, tilting his head toward the balcony, “wanna step outside?”</p><p>Clary nods with a hopeful smile and follows Jace out.</p><p> </p><p>“...so,” Izzy is the first to speak, she sinks back into the sofa as she does so, “that was awkward.”</p><p>Magnus lets out a small snort, “I was worried she would never get to it,” he snickers.</p><p>“Are we supposed to pretend we aren’t watching them now?” Izzy leans on her forearm draped on the back of the couch, not even trying to hide the fact that she’s spying on Jace and Clary’s conversation.</p><p>“Give them some privacy, Iz,” Alec says, without taking his eyes off his brother, either. Izzy laughs when she sees it, but finally does turn around and faces the other man in the room. It caught Alec by complete surprise when Magnus stepped into the condo with Clary, and he hasn’t fully processed the situation yet. The sunshine catches his mesmerizing brown eyes and the shimmery eyeshadow that match his skin tone almost to perfection - they glimmer with every movement he makes. He smiles warmly at them as he takes a sip of the water Alec managed to offer him (it may have taken nudging from Izzy to remember to be a proper host).</p><p>“How are you doing, Isabelle?” He asks. His head tilts to the side as he asks, placing the tips of his coiffed hair into the sunlight. Alec didn’t notice earlier, but it’s dyed a dark shade of turquoise. “You look well.”</p><p>“I’m feeling well,” her lips quirk in a hint of a smile, “thank you.”</p><p>His sister chooses her words carefully, probably since Magnus doesn’t know that she’s told Alec he was the one who found her.</p><p>“Simon sends his regards,” Magnus adds with a knowing smile that makes Izzy chuckle. He turns to Alec, “to you as well, Alexander.”</p><p>Alec returns an easy smile, “you’ll have to tell him ‘hi’ for me the next time you see him.”</p><p>“Speaking of, if Clary’s in town for the next week and if <em> that </em>-” Izzy points a thumb Jace and Clary outside, standing much closer to each other than they had a minute ago, “- is going to be a thing again, we should get together again! For old times sake.” She winks at Magnus whose eyes crinkle at the edges in a smile.</p><p>“Ah, unfortunately duty calls. I’m headed back to Boston tomorrow,” he replies apologetically with a small shrug of his shoulders.</p><p>“So soon?” Alec blurts out before he can stop himself, and the words seem to surprise Magnus as much as they do Alec, seeing how Magnus’ eyes jump up to meet his own. He feels that now familiar electricity when their eyes meet, and it mellows as soon as Magnus’ gaze softens. Alec’s face flushes warm, but he doesn’t dare to look away.</p><p>“I wish I could stay a while longer,” Magnus replies, a fondness that makes Alec melt a little inside lacing through his voice. They’re yanked out of their bubble when they hear someone clear their throat pointedly. Alec regards Izzy with wide eyes and feels his face flushing bright red for a whole new reason.</p><p>“As much as I’m enjoying whatever’s going on right here,” she starts, gesturing vaguely at the two men with her lacquered nails, but instead of finishing her sentence, she tilts her head toward the balcony window again. When Magnus and Alec look over, they see Jace and Clary mid-embrace.</p><p>Jace’s shoulders are slanted down, all that tension he carried out with him seemingly gone. A smile adorns his face where it leans into Clary’s temple, Alec can see him whispering into her ears as they sway together lightly, back and forth, as one. When they finally part, Clary looks up at him, green eyes glistening brightly in the sun. She looks so <em> happy</em>. They both do. He feels a pang of wistfulness at the sight of the two, staring adoringly into each other’s eyes. Filled with so much joy. He has the decency to look away when he sees Clary lean up on her tip-toes to kiss his brother (he notices that Izzy doesn’t show the same courtesy and just whistles at the couple with a playful smirk on her face), and his eyes somehow find Magnus’ again. Magnus, like Alec, has looked away to give the two some semblance of privacy. Alec watches him relax into the sofa seat as he takes a small sip of his water, absentmindedly wiping the condensation that threatens to spill onto his lap.</p><p>The realization hits Alec out of nowhere - Magnus did this. Of course he did. It’s ridiculous that he didn’t realize sooner, because why else would Clary suddenly choose to return out of the blue like this? To apologize to Jace, to try to make amends.</p><p>“Magnus,” he calls out without meaning to, feeling an overwhelming surge of affection for the man; this generous, kind, righteous man. How could he not? Magnus looks up at him with what looks like apprehension in his eyes, but he must see something in Alec’s face that causes it to vanish immediately. Relief floods through his features instead, and his mouth quirks up into a hesitant grin. It’s nowhere near as confident as Magnus usually seems but it still fills Alec with a heated flutter that runs straight up his spine. Alec wants to thank him, he wants to wrap him in a tight embrace, he wants to hold his hand, he wants to… he <em> wants</em>. So much so that he feels like he’s overflowing with it. He opens his mouth again, trying to put words to the emotions that course through his body, but is interrupted by the balcony door opening. The sound shocks him back to reality like a bucket of ice. What would he have said if he wasn’t interrupted?</p><p>He tries to brush off the embarrassment of the moment, hastily looking away from Magnus and back at Jace and Clary, who stand hand in hand with matching giddy grins.</p><p>“I assume this means you’ve resolved your qualms?” Magnus speaks first. And while Alec can’t see his face, he can hear the smile in his voice. Clary just giggles in response, airy and unrestrained.</p><p>“You could say that, yeah,” she looks up at Jace from the corner of her eyes and leans into him a little.</p><p>“We were gonna go out and grab a snack at the cafe next door, want me to get you anything?” Jace adds, clearly eager to get away from the audience. The others all shake their heads and watch the two leave. The couple never once lets go of each other’s hands.</p><p>“Well I think that’s my cue,” Magnus says, getting to his feet.</p><p>Thankfully Izzy speaks up before Alec can say anything truly embarrassing. “You don’t have to leave yet! Stay and catch up with us,” she pouts.</p><p>“I would be delighted, but I have some work to do while I’m here and I have to get back to Pandemonium. It was wonderful seeing the two of you, though. And Jace as well.” He sounds sincere enough, like he really does want to stay. The apologetic tone eases some of the nerves that brew in Alec’s stomach.</p><p>“Fine, I guess you’re off the hook. But next time you’re in town, we’re hanging out for real!” Izzy smiles, standing up and leaning up to give the man a kiss on his cheek. Magnus returns the gesture and turns to Alec.</p><p>“I guess I’ll… see you around, then,” Alec mumbles lamely, and Izzy doesn’t even attempt to stifle her snort of laughter. Her eyes are dancing with mirth when Alec frowns at her.</p><p>“I need to use the restroom - but you two don’t mind me, really. Take your time. All afternoon if you need to, the bedroom is right over ther-”</p><p>“Izzy!!” Alec practically yelps at her crassness, but she just cackles as she saunters off.</p><p>Finally alone, the two men stand in silence for a moment, unsure of what to say or do; it reminds Alec of when they were at Havoc, before they finally cleared the final dregs of misunderstandings between them. Now the air feels just as charged, but with something else, and Alec can hardly breathe. He takes in a deliberate, deep inhale, carefully releasing it along with the tightness that’s crept into his shoulders.</p><p>“I should get going,” Magnus begins, a hint of discomfort tinting his words, “it was a pleasure, Alexander.”</p><p>Alec nods a few times, a little frantic and a lot embarrassing, “right, of course. I’ll walk you to the door.”</p><p>They walk the short distance side by side, and Alec doesn’t think he’s imagining the fact that they’re bodies are positioned a lot closer than considered polite. He doesn’t make a move to distance himself.</p><p>Then right as they reach the door, he thinks he feels the back of Magnus’ hand brush against his knuckles (or maybe he <em> is </em>imagining that), and his breath catches in his chest. Still, he doesn’t make a move to pull his hand away.</p><p>But Magnus does.</p><p>His fingers lift to his ear cuff, gently fidgeting with it like Alec’s seen him do so many times before.</p><p>“Are you nervous?” He asks without thought.</p><p>Magnus huffs out a dry laugh, “I’m afraid you always make me a little nervous,” he muses, “I have to say it’s a bit disorienting.”</p><p>The smile that surfaces on Alec’s face must look as smug as he’s feeling, because it makes Magnus chuckle.</p><p>“I’m glad you find my suffering entertaining,” he teases, rolling his eyes. The easy banter fills Alec with a confidence that he hasn’t felt since meeting Magnus, which is probably the only reason Alec’s able to stumble through the following words.</p><p>“We should have that dinner, next time you’re in the city. The one we missed.”</p><p>Magnus looks stunned, his eyebrows shoot up toward his hairline, and for one dreadful moment Alec wonders if he misread the whole situation. But before he can blurt out an awkward apology, Magnus’ eyes crinkle and Alec’s treated to the brightest smile he’s seen today (or maybe ever).</p><p>“I’d like that,” Magnus replies. A relieved sigh passes through Alec’s lips as he nods silently, unable to wipe the goofy grin that spreads on his face.</p><p>“You two are adorable,” a gleeful voice cuts through the moment, and Alec suddenly remembers that they aren’t alone in the apartment. He turns around, and to his horror, Izzy stands with her phone in her hands.</p><p>“Iz…” he scowls at her, which only makes her laugh more.</p><p>“I just got the cutest photo of Magnus! I’ll be sure to share it with you later,” she tells him with a wink, and Alec’s about to call her out for being so nosy, but she just flicks her hair off her shoulder and turns on her heels, “I’ll be back in the living room studying! See you next time, Magnus.”</p><p>Alec is bright red by the time she disappears around the corner.</p><p>“I am… so sorry,” he stammers.</p><p>Magnus just laughs, “I’m glad to see she’s well, seeming more like her former self.”</p><p>Alec smiles in return, “we’ve got our ups and downs, but yeah… she’s doing alright.” Magnus nods in understanding, in a way that Alec knows Magnus <em> does </em> get it. He wonders his experience with Simon was anything like this.</p><p>“As much as I hate it, I really do have to get going,” the man says with a breathy laugh, and Alec is reminded that they’ve been standing in front of the door for quite a while now.</p><p>“Right, sorry,” he says, pink returning to his cheeks.</p><p>“Don’t be.” Magnus pulls the door open with a soft smile on his face. “Until next time, then.”</p><p> </p><p>After he leaves, Alec stands by the closed door alone to give himself a moment to digest everything that just occurred.</p><p>He thinks he asked Magnus Bane out on a date. And isn’t that a terrifying thought.</p><p>A manic laughter bubbles up as he realizes how entirely out of his element he is. He can still hardly believe that Magnus would even <em> want </em>to go out with him after everything. He’s so deep in thought that he misses the footsteps that come down from the living room.</p><p>“Are you going to stand there all afternoon or are you going to come over and tell me everything?” Izzy’s amused voice travels down the hall from where she leans against the wall. Alec pins her with another disapproving glare.</p><p>“You need to learn to mind your own business,” he sighs, making his way back to the living room.</p><p>Izzy giggles, “oh come <em> on</em>. You were practically eye-fucking right in front of me!”</p><p>“We were <em> what</em>?!” Alec gawks.</p><p>Without another word, Izzy points her cell phone screen at Alec. It’s pulled up to an Instagram story that she’s posted; it’s the photo of Magnus she just took, which she’s seemingly tagged Magnus in with a heart-eye emoji caption. In the photo, it’s clear that Magnus doesn’t know that his photo is being taken. The camera is zoomed into his face where he’s looking at Alec, who’s just out of frame, and…</p><p>“What would you call that?” She asks him, head tilted and eyes narrowed in challenge.</p><p>Alec stares at the screen in disbelief. Even in a photo, Magnus’ eyes are so expressive. When he’s right in front of him, Alec can barely focus on anything else, but there’s a rush in seeing how out of context in a photo, the warmth and tenderness is still so clear in his gaze.</p><p>And he’s looking at <em> Alec</em>.</p><p>“You aren’t much better yourself, you know?” Izzy huffs, happily. “Aww, Magnus shared the photo on his own story!” She coos.</p><p>Knowing that Magnus saw <em> that </em> and chose to share it fills Alec with another surge of smug elation. He has no right feeling so hopeful, but by the Angel, he does. And in that moment, he knows as clear as day that he’s already so far gone for Magnus Bane. The emotions aren’t foreign to him, not at all now that he thinks about it, but there’s something exhilarating in finally admitting the fact. His feelings must be readily broadcasted on his face because Izzy sees him and snickers.</p><p>“I wish I got a pic of that.”</p><p>She heads out onto the balcony again, textbook back in hand, and Alec follows her out. The sun is lower in the sky, but still warm on their skin. New York City is uncharacteristically quiet, now. Just the faint noises of traffic and the wind that blows a little stronger on these higher floors. Izzy turns on some music and starts humming along (poorly - Izzy can’t carry a tune if her life depended on it), and for the first time in months, Alec feels perfectly content.</p><p>He thinks of Izzy in front of him, relaxed and comfortable - safe at home with her family who love her. He thinks of Jace, out with Clary, and the look of pure joy that he so easily exudes whenever she’s around. He thinks of Magnus and their promise of <em> next time</em>.</p><p>And he thinks that maybe things aren’t just going to be <em> alright</em>. Maybe they can be even better.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I hope you all enjoyed the chapter - I would love to hear your thoughts if you feel so inclined!</p><p>As usual, endless thank yous to all of you who read and comment! I can’t believe we’re only a chapter and epilogue away to the end of this one! All set up for our happy ending.</p><p>Until next week!</p><p>tsujiharu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Most Ardently</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The three are so engulfed in their conversation that they don’t recognize when an abnormal quiet befalls the restaurant. It’s only when they hear their server’s panicked voice that they realize something isn’t right, and they look toward the entrance where the hostess seems to be arguing with someone.<br/>“Ma’am, I’m sorry, but you can’t just -”<br/>“Listen, I just need to say hi to my friends here, and I’ll be on my way.” A cloyingly sweet voice travels through the space, filling Alec with disdain even before he can register who it belongs to. When he finally identifies the source of the voice, he freezes.</p><p>***</p><p>The Lighwoods get another unexpected visitor determined to keep Magnus and Alec away from each other.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Friday!<br/>The final chapter before the epilogue. I hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The Lightwood siblings decide to celebrate that night. Clary isn’t able to make it, but Izzy declares that she and Alec are taking Jace out for dinner to get the details on everything that went down with the redhead. They’re at their favorite local burger place, where they never skimp on portion size and the fries are perfectly crispy on the outside and fluffy on the inside. The restaurant is crowded at dinnertime, lively with conversations that overlap around them. But the three of them lean in close, engaged in their own banter while putting away their meals.</p><p>“She didn’t think I wanted to be with her,” Jace laughs hollowly in disbelief, “apparently Jonathan just wouldn’t shut up about it. Gave her all the reasons why I was just trying to fuck her over.”</p><p>“Figures, that guy had it out for you from the get-go,” Izzy exclaims, rolling her eyes. It seems Clary decided not to let Jace know of Magnus’ involvement in the matter.</p><p>“She blocked me because she didn’t trust herself not to reach out - or to keep strong if I contacted her,” he concludes. Alec shakes his head.</p><p>“That was cold,” he comments. His sister nods in agreement.</p><p>“I guess I could’ve tried harder, too…” Jace says, as if he’s mulling it over.</p><p>“What were you supposed to think, though?” Izzy dips a fry in ketchup and brings it to her mouth as she asks.</p><p>“She’s back now, that’s really what matters,” Alec adds, and Jace’s face breaks into another grin. “Glad she came to her senses. And she’s lucky you let her off the hook so easily. Not sure if I’d be able to do the same if I was in your shoes.”</p><p>He’s reminded of how long it took him and Magnus to get to where they are now - that is to say, a little less shaky but still on uneven grounds. Alec envies his brother’s ability to let go and focus on what’s actually important. Like how happy Clary seems to make him. Even without her here, just talking about her seems to bring a permanent smile out of him, and his joy is contagious.</p><p>They continue to chat about the couple’s plans; Clary is still going to be attending school in LA, so they’re bound to be long distance for a while. Jace’s face falls slightly the more they talk about those details, but he stays resolved in the fact that it doesn’t change that Clary’s the one he wants to be with. Jace can be stubborn when he really wants something (or <em> determined </em> is a kinder way to put it, Alec supposes), and while it’s caused the two to butt heads more than once, Alec respects that about him.</p><p>The three are so engulfed in their conversation that they don’t recognize when an abnormal quiet befalls the restaurant. It’s only when they hear their server’s panicked voice that they realize something isn’t right, and they look toward the entrance where the hostess seems to be arguing with someone.</p><p>“Ma’am, I’m sorry, but you can’t just -”</p><p>“Listen, I just need to say hi to my friends here, and I’ll be on my way.” A cloyingly sweet voice travels through the space, filling Alec with disdain even before he can register who it belongs to. When he finally identifies the source of the voice, he freezes.</p><p>Camille Belcourt strides straight toward their table, exuding an air of lofty confidence in her bright red jumpsuit and pin heel shoes that click elegantly with every step she takes. She looks completely out of place in the nice, but relatively casual eatery. There’s a thin smile plastered on her face that doesn’t reach her eyes, and Alec doesn’t need to see or hear anything else to know that this isn’t good.</p><p>“Oh my god, Alec, is that Camille?” Izzy whispers from beside him, as they all try to comprehend what’s going on. But before Alec can respond in words, Camille is standing by their table.</p><p>“Alexander Lightwood.” He thinks it’s supposed to be a greeting, perhaps, but she manages to make his name sound like a threat.</p><p>“I go by Alec, actually,” he replies, voice even. He sees Jace out of the corner of his vision eyeing the newcomer suspiciously. Even Izzy, who has always been intrigued by fame and all the gossip that goes with it doesn’t seem enthused by the current situation. A calm overcomes him, as if he’s about to head into court - the cold professionalism he wears like a mask comes naturally back to him.</p><p>Camille rolls her eyes, “whatever. I just wanted to have a little chat with <em> Alec</em>,” she spits his name out as if it personally offends her, “we can do this here with an audience, or we can talk alone.”</p><p>Before either of his siblings can object, Alec stands. Izzy places a protective hand on his shoulder, as if to stop him, but he lightly shrugs her off, sending her a reassuring smile.</p><p>“Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.”</p><p>“You sure, man? We can go with you,” Jace tries, but Alec shakes his head. He takes his time, sliding his chair in carefully before he trains his eyes back onto Camille.</p><p>“Shall we?”</p><p> </p><p>*******************</p><p> </p><p><em> Alone </em> still ends up being pretty public, but at least they don’t have a restaurant full of people gawking at them. They find themselves walking around the reservoir in Central Park, since it was only a few blocks away from the restaurant. Sunset is approaching, and the streetlights begin to flicker on above them. Alec has a fleeting thought that Camille and her pin heel shoes don’t really fit into this scene. They live in different worlds, he thinks.</p><p>“I want to talk to you about Magnus,” she says without preamble, coming to a sudden stop under a streetlight. Alec squares his shoulders, standing straighter, hands interlocked behind his back in parade rest. He wonders why Camille would come all the way to New York just to ask him about Magnus.</p><p>“I saw that little post on social media your sister made,” her voice lingers unpleasantly in the air. It’s <em> too </em> sweet, Alec decides. “He seems smitten with you.”</p><p>“If you say so,” Alec replies, noncommittal.</p><p>“Oh <em> Sweetheart</em>,” she coos, hitting that condescending note oh-so easily, “I get it. He’s handsome, charismatic, <em> rich</em>,” the way she says the last word absolutely rubs Alec the wrong way. The fake smile that never once leaves her face probably doesn’t help. “And he seems to be enamoured with you. What’s not to like, right? But there’s one thing you have to understand about Magnus.”</p><p>“Which is?” He arches a brow, refusing to be intimidated by this snake of a woman.</p><p>“Magnus is mine. He’s always been mine, and he always will be.”</p><p>He holds his breath for a quick moment, holding his immediate reaction with it, counts to three, then releases it very deliberately.</p><p>“From what I’ve heard you let go of that a few years ago.”</p><p>“I suppose we’ve been on a longer break this time,” she drawls, “but Magnus always comes back to me. He loves <em> me</em>.”</p><p>She says it with such finality, that Alec almost falters. But he’s seen Magnus interact with Camille and he’s heard the rumors. </p><p>“If you’re so confident, I wonder why you came all the way here to tell me all of this.” He tilts his head to the side in challenge, his tone remains calm, his words assured.</p><p>“I wanted to save you the embarrassment,” she explains, as if it’s obvious, with a hint of annoyance and an underlying current of something else. Something Alec recognizes and hones in on.</p><p>“Or you’re threatened by me.” The words seem to hit their mark, causing Camille to visibly bristle.</p><p>“Threatened? By <em> you</em>?” She scoffs, “please. You’re a conceited little thing, aren’t you? Do you think you <em> deserve </em> Magnus? You? I mean, just look at your family.” Her brows furrow in disgust.</p><p>“What’s that supposed to mean?” Alec narrows his eyes, his lips pull into a tight line.</p><p>“Well where can I start,” she lifts a long, boney index finger up to her chin. Tapping it in an overexaggerated way. “Your mother, for one. A pathetic clout-chaser. She’s so obsessed with fame, class, money, she’d just about do anything, won’t she. I know about the failed attempt at a partnership with Lorenzo Rey and how she had to sulk back to her ex-husband with her tail tucked between her legs after he left her for some younger ass. Doesn’t even have the business sense to keep the firm running on her own. Not like you’re much of a help on that front.</p><p>“And your poor orphan brother. Seems like he learned from the best. I hear he’s involved with that Morgenstern girl now. I’m sure <em> that’ll </em> keep him relevant for a little while longer. Or did he just run out of girls to fuck in New York? Magnus is <em> very </em> protective of that girl, you know. He won’t like it when that playboy brother of yours decides he’s bored with his new flavor of the month.</p><p>“Oh and we can’t forget your sister. No, no no… I heard all about her antics in Florida,” she says in a gleeful, sing-songy tone, “unfortunate. A promising up-and-comer, already fallen victim to drug abuse. I mean, if people knew how she only narrowly escaped a drug possession charge just because of her wealth? Don’t you get it? You’d only be an embarrassment to Magnus.”</p><p>If Alec thought he was angry earlier, it was nothing compared to the red hot rage he feels now. It takes everything in him not to let that anger take over. He focuses only on keeping his temper even.</p><p>“Are you done?” The icy voice sounds foreign even to himself.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“I asked if you’re done.” He takes Camille’s stunned silence as a <em> yes </em> and keeps going, choosing his words carefully. “It’s clear you’ve done your research, and I see what you’re trying to say.”</p><p>Camille seems to take the words as a confirmation of her tirade, pointing her nose in the air with a smug smirk, as if preparing to grasp her victory. “I’m glad to hear we’re on the same page. So now tell me. Are you dating Magnus Bane?”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>Relief flashes through the woman’s eyes, another sign of her desperation.</p><p>“And I can trust you’ll stay away from him now? Knowing that you can’t possibly measure up to what he needs?” She tries next.</p><p>“No,” Alec is stern, as sure as ever, “I will <em> never </em> make that promise.” Camille recoils as if she’s been burned, somehow taken aback by his response. Her eyes gleam with a sharp anger, but he’s done being fearful, of being pushed around by power. He stares back, unmoved by her glare. His blasé reaction seems to reel Camille even tighter, her shoulders hunching up in agitation.</p><p>“How dare you! You narcissistic, entitled, little shit - you think you’re actually <em> worthy of </em> him?!”</p><p>Despite the verbal abuse being thrown his way, Alec thinks back on all that happened since meeting Magnus with a surprisingly level head. The judgement and misunderstandings, and how they chose to hurt each other through refusing to communicate.</p><p>“Maybe not,” he admits solemnly, “but do you really think <em> you </em> are?”</p><p>It’s clear Camille wasn’t expecting a challenge, especially with how wide her eyes get, she flinches, and Alec can see her putting together a calculated reply.</p><p>“You cast judgement on me and my family, choosing cruel language to do maximum damage. You say it’s all for Magnus, but if I recall correctly, when Magnus chose you, you tossed it aside like trash.”</p><p>“...sure, I made some mistakes in my youth, but Magnus is mine, Sweetheart.” The patronizing pet name doesn’t even bother Alec anymore, not with Camille clearly on the defensive.</p><p>“Magnus isn’t some <em> thing </em> to be passed along from one person to another. He’s a grown man who makes his own choices, and whoever he chooses would be extremely lucky to get to be a part of his life.”</p><p>Her nostrils flare angrily, her beady eyes narrowed as she scowls at Alec. “Don’t you get it? No matter how much time we spend apart, he always comes back to me.”</p><p>“Then surely you wouldn’t be wasting your time here with me.”</p><p>She huffs, clearly frustrated that Alec won’t take the bait.</p><p>“Fine,” she grits out, “how much will it take?”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Everyone has a price. I’m willing to pay it.”</p><p>Alec feels his eyes bulge, balking at the woman’s audacity. “...you can’t be serious. You can’t just pay people to keep them away from someone.”</p><p>“Oh I am, and I know for a fact that you can,” she says, nonchalantly while reaching into her purse. “So tell me. What’s your price?”</p><p>“I think we’re done here.”</p><p>“Oh please, don’t act so self-righteous.” She rolls her eyes.</p><p>“Camille, you came charging into a quiet dinner with my family, then proceeded to insult me in every way imaginable. I think I’ve given you enough attention for an evening.”</p><p>She stands there, jaw ticking and arms crossed over her chest with her checkbook crushing in her tight grip. A deep wrinkle forming between her perfectly symmetrical brows. As he senses her fury radiate off of her petite frame, he can feel his own bleed out. He truly has spent enough time (and energy) on this woman.</p><p>“Would you like me to call you a car?” He asks in an attempt to move this along.</p><p>Camille’s jaw falls, gaping at him like she can’t believe this is happening to her. Maybe she actually can’t. Alec’s reminded of Izzy telling him of the influence Camille has in society, and he belatedly wonders if he’s acting too brazenly. But then again, he supposes it’s too late for that, and he knows he’s making the right decision. Finally. If he has to break a few noses for the cause, then he’ll happily accept the consequences later.</p><p>“I can call my own fucking car,” Camille barks out angrily and spins on her heel back toward the park entrance. “I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into!”</p><p>They aren’t too far in, he can see the streets of New York from where they stopped to talk. He still stands and watches her stomp away (it’s actually kind of impressive how gracefully she moves in those heels, even in agitation) until she’s safely back in the New York crowds. Then he finally lets himself relax. His body melts into the fence behind him as he releases all the tightness it held, and lets out a long, deep breath.</p><p>He hasn’t been gone too long. He could probably return to the restaurant and still find Jace and Izzy there, but it’s the last thing he wants to do right now. He pulls his phone out of his back pocket and sees that he has several missed calls and a number of texts from his siblings, frantically asking where he is. He shoots off a quick text to Izzy, letting her know that he’s fine and to leave without him. The park is quiet, even so close to the city. He hears the cars and the rumbling of people in the distance, but it almost feels like it’s all happening behind a curtain. Something he isn’t a part of. He feels drained, mind exhausted, but his body is buzzing with excess adrenaline from his earlier anger. While he doesn’t regret how he handled the conversation with Camille, and he still thinks she’s a vile excuse of a human, there’s a twist of shame in his gut that keeps telling him that she has a point. He’s fumbled his opportunities with Magnus time and time again, and knowing everything that Magnus has gone through to fix the hurt he felt he caused Alec’s family… Alec doesn’t know how he’ll ever be able to repay him for that. Maybe it’s the price he has to pay for being so quick to judge. To let his pride overrule his better judgement. A chill runs up Alec’s spine, and he shivers in the breeze. The night isn’t cold, but it’s just chilly enough that he can’t stay standing here comfortably. He checks his phone again, and seeing Izzy’s reply that they’ll see him back at the condo, he decides to walk home. It shouldn’t take too long, and he could use the time to clear his head.</p><p>Just as he’s about to put his phone back in his pocket, the screen lights up with an incoming call from an unknown number. He stares at it for a second; Alec doesn’t usually pick up calls from unknown numbers. It crosses his mind that it could be Camille again, trying to get in one last word. But for reasons he can’t explain, he answers the call.</p><p>“Alexander?”</p><p>The voice on the other end sounds frazzled, and while he doesn’t sound like his usual self, Alec can recognize it immediately.</p><p>“Magnus,” his name comes out like a sigh, “is everything okay?”</p><p>Magnus scoffs, as if he can’t believe what Alec just uttered, “I was going to ask you the same thing. Izzy just called me and told me that Camille,”</p><p>“Ah, yeah. She paid me a visit,” Alec chuckles, but it sounds forced.</p><p>He hears a heavy sigh, “I am so sorry, Alexander… I tried to get to you as soon as Izzy called me, but she told me you had left the restaurant and hadn’t come back,” he continues, sounding distraught. Alec wants to erase all that pain from his voice.</p><p>“It’s fine, uh… really,” he tries to reassures him, “she left a bit ago, I’m still in Central Park”</p><p>“Where?”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Where in the park are you?” Magnus repeats.</p><p>Alec looks about him, just to make sure he actually knows where he is. “Uh, by the reservoir. Near the Guggenheim entrance,”</p><p>“Stay right there!”</p><p>The line goes silent before he can say anything back, and Alec pulls his phone from his ear to stare at the dark screen. A sickening mix of anxiety, trepidation, horror, but most prominently, hopeful excitement brews in his stomach when he realizes that Magnus is coming here. To see him. And he’ll be here soon (hopefully). He isn’t sure if he’s ready to face the other man - still feeling raw from Camille’s hateful words, and he doesn’t want to say anything he’ll later regret. He’s done more than enough of that in his relationship with Magnus. But then he remembers that this is <em> Magnus. </em> The man who’s shown him nothing but patience and kindness since their confrontation in Boston, regardless of what Alec deserves. Who took Alec’s angry yelling to heart and brought safety and happiness to the most important people in his life.</p><p>So he stands there, leaning against the fence and shifting his weight awkwardly. He crosses his arms in front of him and forces himself to stand still, breathing in the crisp early-evening air of late summer slowly turning to early fall. The traffic and crowds beyond that curtain fade into meaningless white noise, background to his too-loud thoughts. Thankfully he doesn’t have to wait long, stranded with only his anxiety to keep him company. Eventually, he hears rushed footsteps approach him and he looks again toward the entrance.</p><p>Magnus.</p><p>Alec feels his breath catch in his chest. The deep orange hues of dusk give the man a golden glow; even when he is out of breath, looking like he ran from somewhere and his brows slant down in concern, he’s the most beautiful man Alec’s ever seen.</p><p>As he gets closer, Alec sees that Magnus’ eyes are swimming in something akin to fear or panic, and every single one of Alec’s instincts are telling him to move closer to comfort the man.</p><p>“Hey,” he starts, standing up away from the wall. “You okay?”</p><p>Magnus looks at him in disbelief, his mouth twitches like it isn’t sure if it wants to smile or frown.</p><p>“My ex ruined your evening -” his voice is thin, with a slight tremor, “I can only imagine the horrific things she may have said to you, and you’re asking me if <em> I’m </em>okay?”</p><p>Alec shrugs, “you look like you might pass out.”</p><p>That earns him a loud huff of laughter, “you’re… unexpected. Do you know that?” The panic in Magnus’ eyes abate, and while they still look wary, Alec recognizes the familiar warmth of his gaze. He can’t help but mirror the smile, wondering if he’s always been so sappy.</p><p>“I’m so sorry, Alexander, Camille… she,”</p><p>“Has an unhealthy attachment to you? I noticed,” he interrupts dryly, and gets a grimace from Magnus in response.</p><p>“She wasn’t always like that, but I think she isn’t used to being denied.” Magnus averts his gaze toward the water, looking distant. Alec hates it.</p><p>“I kind of got that as well.” He takes a few steps toward the other man, hoping to get Magnus to look at him again; pleased, when it works.</p><p>“Alexander, I don’t know how I could ever make up for such behavior -”</p><p>“Hey, hey, no. Magnus, none of that is on you. Those are her actions and her choices. You can’t control that.” He finally gives in to his impulses and moves in close enough to reach out and place a gentle hand on Magnus’ forearm. </p><p>Magnus nods, but the crease between his brows makes Alec think that he doesn’t quite believe him.</p><p>“Besides,” Alec adds, “after everything you’ve done for Izzy - and for Jace too, I’m guessing - I should be the one apologizing.”</p><p>He looks away only for a moment, embarrassed to meet Magnus’ eyes while he makes the admission, but he’s surprised to see doubt in Magnus’ features when his gaze darts back. Alec’s eyes inadvertently glance down to see Magnus trap his lower lip between his teeth as he considers Alec’s words.</p><p>“I wasn’t sure if further meddling would be appreciated,” he concedes, “but I couldn’t let it be, knowing how much pain I had caused you.”</p><p>
  <em> You. </em>
</p><p>Alec latches onto the word like a lifeline. <em> Me</em>. And as if Magnus can see the hope that returns to him, he surges on.</p><p>“You have to know, Alec… that I did it all for you.”</p><p>The whispered confession makes Alec’s heart flip inside him, and just like that, with just three words, all that anxiety, the questions, the self-doubt melt away.</p><p>“Magnus,” he can hear it himself, now. Just in the way he calls the other’s name. Magnus closes his eyes, like he’s savoring the sound. When he finally opens them again, there’s a heat flickering within them that provokes an excited thrill in Alec.</p><p>“Alexander,” he says, breathless, as if uttering a prayer. His gaze lowers, still timid, and his voice turns pleading with the next words. “Alexander, please, I need to know.”</p><p>Alec lets his hand travel lower, fingers sliding gently along the silky fabric of Magnus’ sleeve.</p><p>“What do you need?” His voice is soft, barely audible over the muted city noises that drift from the streets that seem so far away now.</p><p>“I need to know, if you still feel the same way as you did in Boston. Because I… if you do, I’ll stop. I’ll leave you be, and I’ll -”</p><p>“And if not?” Alec stares at Magnus, who peers up at him through his dark lashes that frame his beautiful, mesmerizing eyes.</p><p>“If not… then I need to tell you, that my feelings haven’t changed. You’ve bewitched me, body and soul. And I know… I know that we started off on the wrong foot, and that I made some malicious assumptions, and I know that I said some unforgivable things,” he starts to ramble, and Alec can’t stifle the fond laugh that escapes him.</p><p>“Magnus, after everything that’s happened - what I said and did, and what you’ve done to make up for everything… I think it’s safe to say we’re all even. If anything, I owe you <em>everything</em>.”</p><p>His fingers keep moving downward, until they brush against Magnus’. He moves slowly, giving Magnus a chance to move away if he needs to, but he stays completely still. Breath stuttering against Alec’s face (when did they get so close?). Alec presses his palm against the warmth of Magnus’, lacing their fingers together. He lifts his other hand to Magnus’ cheek. Tenderly tracing his cheekbones with his thumb. He leans in, taking his time. Magnus looks up at him, awestruck and in disbelief. He can only wonder what Magnus sees in his eyes.</p><p>“You’ve gone above and beyond to bring joy to the people that mean the most to me. All because you’re determined to do what’s right. You’re generous, you’re kind, you’re… you’re incredible, Magnus,” he whispers against Magnus’ cheek, his forehead angling down to meet Magnus’ temple. “How could I not want to be with you?”</p><p>Magnus tilts his head up, pure happiness and endless hope radiating from his watery eyes. With every second that passes, Alec feels the world narrowing down to just the two of them, just this moment in time. The world around them seems to go completely silent; the city noises completely faded. With one last flutter of his eyelashes - a glance to Magnus’ lips and back, Alec’s the one who closes the last remaining distance between them. </p><p> </p><p>Their lips finally meet.</p><p>Soft, sweet, and gentle.</p><p>And it’s perfect. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thank you so SO much for your support throughout this fic!! It’s been so much fun to write, but I honestly couldn’t have done it without your kind words and kudos :)<br/>I am finishing up the epilogue now, and it’s shaping up to be 100% fluff (because I think we all deserve that after all the pining and the back and forths haha) with some wrap up on the various characters that made an appearance in the fic.</p><p>I’m excited to share that with you next week!</p><p>tsujiharu</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Epilogue</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>I must learn to be content with being happier than I deserve<br/>- Jane Austen</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Happy Friday, everyone!!<br/>Sorry for the delay in posting - work was ridiculously busy this week and I didn’t get as much time for writing… but I really wanted to get the epilogue posted today!! It’s just 4000+ words of fluffy wrap up, but I hope you enjoy it!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <b>***One Year Later***</b>
</p><p> </p><p>There is 42 minutes and 29 seconds remaining on the timer… 28… 27… He’s been told enough times that now they can only wait, and that there isn’t more that can be done at this point… but Alec can’t help but reach for the oven door.</p><p>“Alexander Gideon Lightwood. For the last time, get out of my kitchen or I swear -”</p><p>Contrary to the harsh words, Magnus’ voice is full of fondness. Alec straightens up from where he was peeking into the oven to look over at his boyfriend with a guilty smile.</p><p>“I thought you had work to get done before our guests arrive?” Magnus chides as he walks over from the doorway and swats Alec’s hand away from the oven handle.</p><p>“I just wanted to make sure everything was on time,” is apparently the wrong thing to say, because the teasing smile Magnus was sporting flips into a frown.</p><p>“I am perfectly capable of preparing a nice meal for our friends and family,” he responds, unamused. He points at the oven, then at the small pot on the stove. “The roast is cooking and should be ready right at 6:30, and the reduction sauce is simmering and will be perfect.”</p><p>Alec wraps his arms around the other man’s waist and pulls him in for a kiss, Magnus’ scowl quickly evaporates as he turns pliant against him (it works about 90% of the time, Alec would argue). “You’re right. Everything smells amazing, and you have everything under control.”</p><p>“That’s more like it,” Magnus hums, “now go get your beautiful self out of here and finish up what you need to. I don’t want you thinking about work tonight.” Alec tries to be put out by it, but he can’t help but be amused until Magnus adds, “Not to mention I don’t trust you not to touch anything in the kitchen.”</p><p>“Hey,” he huffs. Magnus peers up at him in his arms and smiles - it’s one of those bright, glowing ones where his eyes tilt down and his lips curl up, and it fills Alec with warmth.</p><p>“I love you, darling, but the kitchen is not where your strengths lie,” he punctuates his words with a kiss.</p><p>Alec scrunches his brows together disapprovingly, but still leans in to the kiss. “You said you liked my French toast.”</p><p>“Oh, yes, that was delightful. Maybe it’s a savory thing.” Magnus ponders as he wiggles out of Alec’s arms and walks up to the stove to stir the sauce. He looks over his shoulder and shoos him away. His golden rings glimmer under the fluorescents, and Alec notices that he must have painted his nails gold sometime this afternoon to match his jewelry.</p><p>“Fine,” he sighs with mock-annoyance, turning around to leave “let me know if you need me.”</p><p> </p><p>He makes his way to Magnus’ study, where Alec now has a desk for himself when he needs to work at odd hours. Alec declined Magnus’ offer, at first, when he suggested getting Alec a desk in the study. But once it was clear Alec was spending a majority of his free time at Magnus’ Brooklyn loft, he finally agreed it would be helpful.</p><p>Things have been going… exceedingly well. While they have their occasional arguments, the last year with Magnus has been nothing short of magical.</p><p>It was no surprise when Magnus turned out to be the most supportive partner Alec could imagine. When Alec told him about his plans for Lightwood &amp; Associates and how his mother had started including him in more of the operational side of the firm, he beamed with pride and even helped him brainstorm some ideas. Now, a year later, the firm is taking on a wider variety of clients (and turning down a number of the more unsavory ones - a move which was initially met by some hesitance from Maryse and Robert, but they eventually relented) and the LA branch of the firm is up and running with Robert taking the lead. Maryse has taken a small step back in operations in New York, giving Alec more rein, which has resulted in the firm being busier than ever, but Alec has never felt more driven in his work.</p><p>Maryse had blanched when Alec first told her he’d made an enemy out of Camille Belcourt, but then Alec explained what Camille had said (though he kept the details to himself) and the actions Magnus had taken for Jace and Izzy, and she was quick to turn. A determined, righteous, and <em> furious </em> Maryse is not an enemy Alec would ever want. Alec suggested he could represent Magnus against her, but she turned him down immediately (Alec vaguely recalls the words <em> that bitch is mine </em> being uttered, but he thinks he must have misheard her…). She countered every threat, complaint, and empty allegation cast their way with precision and sharp wit, poking holes in every argument and quickly debunking every claim she made. Of course it helped that all of Camille’s claims were baseless, but even with her social standing, it became clear that she wasn’t going to win this fight in the open. She also found that the connections Magnus had painstakingly made over the years meant that he had some serious support within their mutual connections, too. The last they heard, she made a quiet retreat to London along with a rumor she was going to go marry some Lord. Alec doesn’t care, and barely paid attention aside from the fact that she’s gone.</p><p>He’s completely engrossed in his work when he’s surprised by a gentle touch on his shoulder.</p><p>“Almost done, darling?” Magnus smiles at him, soft and happy. It’s a look that Alec is treated to often, now.</p><p>“I lost track of time,” he says, pinching the bridge of his nose as he closes his laptop. “What time is it?”</p><p>“People should start arriving in about 10min,” Magnus replies easily. He’s pulling on a navy waistcoat with a golden sheen, Alec notes that he’s changed since he’s last seen him. He nods and stands up, straightening out his files on his desk. Side-by-side, they start heading back to the living area.</p><p>“Izzy and Simon are arriving late. They’re coming from a meeting.”</p><p>Simon moved down to New York when Magnus decided to headquarter his operations entirely in Brooklyn, around eight months ago. With it, he began spending more time with Izzy, including attending NA meetings together. So far it seems platonic, but as an older brother, Alec can’t help but worry. There must be something in his voice, because Magnus snorts beside him.</p><p>“I think they make a wonderful couple,” he teases. Alec gives him a sideways glance. “They complement each other well.”</p><p>Alec sighs at the thought. While Alec finds it tedious, he can’t deny that Izzy seems to enjoy listening to Simon’s rambles about the differences between Star Wars and Star Trek or DC and Marvel. He almost chuckles, remembering Izzy walking into his bedroom one night with a crease between her brows, seriously asking about how Lois Lane could possibly not see that Clark Kent is, indeed, Superman.</p><p>“But see, when I first met him I thought he was trying to hit on Maia,” Alec argues, “you can see why I might be concerned.” Now he’s getting the side-eye.</p><p>“Alexander that was over a year ago. And the two remain good friends and good friends only. I think you’re just unhappy that <em> anyone </em> wants to date your sister,” Magnus sighs. Alec purses his lips (and it is absolutely <em> not </em> petulant), but stays silent on the matter. Or in reality, before he can respond, there’s a knock at the front door.</p><p>“My boys!” Maryse opens her arms wide with a bright smile. She hugs both Alec <em> and </em> Magnus, uncaring of the bottle of wine she holds in one hand, complimenting Magnus on how wonderful dinner smells (Alec almost asks why she assumes Magnus is the one who did the cooking, but decides that he doesn’t want to know the answer).</p><p>“Hi Mom. Luke,” he nods to the man standing behind Maryse. Luke Garroway, NYPD detective, is a family friend of Clary’s, and she introduced him to Maryse at a family gathering a few months ago. Magnus never revealed if they planned the match or not, but the two hit it off and have been seeing each other since. While Maryse had already been making strides in mending bridges with her children (family dinners have become <em> enjoyable </em>- especially once Clary, Magnus, and even Simon on occasion began joining them), her relationship with Luke seems to also keep her grounded, too; Alec never imagined his mother dating again, let alone with a NYPD detective, but he can’t remember ever seeing her so happy.</p><p>“Where’s Max?” He asks, looking out the door and down the hall.</p><p>“Making a phone call outside, he’ll be right up,” Maryse responds, sending him a quick glance over her shoulder. She grins, “I think he has a girlfriend.”</p><p>“Maryse,” Luke warns, but there’s a clear fondness in his tone. Alec imagines this isn’t the first time Maryse has teased his baby brother of this possible girlfriend. Max isn’t far behind, and Alec sees him trotting up the stairs to the entryway before he even closes the door.</p><p>“Hey Alec,” he greets, slightly out of breath from running up several flights of stairs.</p><p>“Hey, kid.” Alec can’t help but smile when he sees the happy smirk on his baby brother’s face. “Mom says you were calling your girlfriend.”</p><p>The smile immediately dissipates as his brother turns bright red.</p><p>“MOM!” He yells into the foyer - only to be greeted by everyone else’s laughter.</p><p> </p><p>The front door opens again just about when everyone gets settled in the living room with beverages. Magnus stands to greet their newest guests, with Alec close behind.</p><p>“Your guests of honor have arrived!” Jace calls out from the foyer, followed by Clary’s airy huff of laughter. She passes Magnus a large salad after a quick hug.</p><p>“Sorry we’re a bit late. Jace didn’t tell me how much more packing he had to do.” Accusatory green eyes settle on the blond, who’s decisively keeping his gaze anywhere but on his girlfriend.</p><p>“Please don’t tell me his shit is still all over the living room…” Alec groans as he walks up.</p><p>“We got most of it packed, I think?” She offers with a shrug. “But then Robert called and he got kind of distracted....” She glares back up at Jace.</p><p>“Dad says hi, by the way,” Jace adds in a clear attempt to change the subject.</p><p>“The movers are coming the day after tomorrow?” Alec confirms.</p><p>Jace nods, “first thing in the morning. I should have everything packed and ready to be picked up by tomorrow evening, though.”</p><p>Robert, whose <em> professional reconciliation </em> (Alec still hates that phrasing with a burning passion) with Maryse has been progressing smoothly, and while his relationships with his children haven't been as smooth sailing, they’re making some headway. Jace in particular has spent more time in LA over the last year since getting together with Clary, and in turn has spent more time with Robert as well. Now that Lightwood &amp; Associates were ready to have a physical West Coast office, Jace decided to officially move out west to be head of security of their LA office. Magnus was the one who suggested they gather for a goodbye party, even offering to host it since the condo was bound to be littered with Jace’s belongings ready to be packed.</p><p> </p><p>They’re all about to settle down for dinner (the roast came out perfectly, not that Alec thinks opening the oven would have made any difference) when Simon and Izzy walk in. Their shoulders brush as they enter the dining room. Izzy has an easy smile that’s usually reserved for family, and Alec begrudgingly has to agree that Magnus may have a point about them. Without a thought, he glances over at his boyfriend who’s glancing right back, a smug smirk plastered on his face. Alec rolls his eyes.</p><p> </p><p>*****************</p><p> </p><p>Alec watches his family and friends from the balcony, the slight chill of the early autumn evenings settles comfortably on his skin. Laughter wafts through the French doors he left cracked, and he can see the joy that radiates through the air inside. Jace, Clary, and Magnus are sitting on the sofa engaged in some heated debate. Izzy, Simon, and Max at the table, Simon enthusiastically swinging his hands around as he tells some elaborate story, and Izzy watching him with such softness in her eyes. Maryse and Luke sit comfortably on the loveseat next to the sectional, happily watching the kids while talking quietly between themselves. Alec leans back against the railing and takes a sip of his beer as he watches the people he loves. It still surprises him sometimes, even now, how much of a difference a year can make. And by next week, Jace will be settling down in LA with Clary, and this night will only be a memory… he’s hit by an unexpected melancholy as he thinks of how quickly things change. As he looks across the room, his eyes meet Jace’s, and he sees his brother excuse himself from his conversation with Clary and Magnus to make his way toward Alec.</p><p>“Hey,” his brother greets him as he steps out on the balcony. “You feeling okay, man?”</p><p>“Yeah, just wanted some air,” Alec replies easily.</p><p>Jace gives a small nod, walking up to the railing. “Thanks again for hosting.”</p><p>“You should be thanking Magnus, it’s his place,” Alec chuckles.</p><p>Jace’s mouth turns down in a small frown at that, but just as soon as it happens it quirks back up into a grin, “I don’t know. You’re here often enough that it almost feels like your place, too.”</p><p>Alec feels his cheeks heat, and it must be obvious because Jace huffs in laughter.</p><p>“I’m happy for you, Alec. Magnus is a great guy, and you deserve someone good.” The sentiment is unusually sincere, especially coming from his often emotionally constipated brother (not that Alec fares much better on that front - though Magnus has done a lot over the last year to coax Alec out of his shell).</p><p>“Yeah?” He tries, searching for the appropriate response. “I’m happy for you too, you know? You and Clary. You have a good thing going.”</p><p>Jace leans his forearms on the railing, staring out at the city. He releases a long sigh, and after a moment, he opens his mouth - </p><p>“I’m going to ask her to marry me.”</p><p>A stunned silence fills the space between the brothers. Because this is Jace. His little brother who barely believed in love just a year ago. Who warmed a different bed every night because it’s all he thought he was good for, and…</p><p>“Alec? I was kinda hoping for some reassurance here,” Jace winces, and it’s enough to startle Alec out of his thoughts. He regards his brother, who looks back at him with eyes narrowed nervously. He looks a little uncertain, but Alec knows his brother well enough to sense the undercurrent of excitement in his eyes. He places a firm palm on Jace’s shoulder.</p><p>“That’s great, Jace, really,” Alec grins widely, and Jace immediately mirrors the expression. “You’re going to make Clary the happiest woman in the world.”</p><p>“Yeah?” He asks, a little breathless, “you think she’ll say yes?”</p><p>“Dude. Have you <em> seen </em> the way she looks at you?” Alec chuckles.</p><p>“Yeah, yeah… I’m a lucky son of a bitch,” Jace laughs. His expression turns serious, though the shadow of his smile remains. “I’m going to ask her tomorrow. I want her to know what it means - moving to LA.”</p><p>Alec nods and turns back toward the loft. He sees Magnus and Clary, leaning in close to each other, Clary giggling at something that Magnus said. Her eyes glimmer in the warm lighting of the loft as they flicker toward the balcony. She sees him looking and smiles warmly.</p><p>And just like that, Alec knows that this is the woman who’ll love his brother the way he deserves for the rest of his life. He returns the smile and watches her turn back to Magnus and whisper, as if they’re sharing secrets, and now two sets of laughing eyes are pointed at them out on the balcony. Alec huffs and takes another sip of his beer.</p><p>“You’ve got this, Jace. I’ve never seen you happier than when you’ve been with Clary, and it’s all I’ve ever wanted for you.”</p><p>Jace’s lips curl up, “thanks, man. It means a lot.”</p><p>The balcony door opens, sending a burst of warm air their way.</p><p>“Jace - your girlfriend would like a word,” Magnus teases, “she promises you aren’t in trouble.”</p><p>Jace lets out an airy laugh, “that’s never a good sign. I’m getting a bit cold out here anyway.” He looks back at Alec over his shoulder. “I’ll see you back inside?”</p><p>Alec nods at his brother and watches him head back in, making a beeline for his girlfriend (soon to be fiance, hopefully). Magnus stays, walking right up to Alec and wrapping his arms around his waist. Alec spreads his legs a little, making space for Magnus to cuddle up, and he wraps his open arm around Magnus’ shoulder. He’s rewarded with a gentle kiss.</p><p>“Darling, your nose is cold,” Magnus mumbles against his lips, “maybe you should come back inside.”</p><p>“In a second,” Alec says, dropping another peck to Magnus’ soft, glossy lips. He’s gotten used to getting a little gloss on his own lips as well. Magnus leans back a little, studying him with an assessing eye.</p><p>“You look… happy,” is what he settles on, and Alec just laughs.</p><p>“Yeah, I am.” He agrees, thoughtful, adding, “I’ll miss Jace, but I think he’s going to be happy in LA, with Clary.”</p><p>“Hm. I agree. She thinks he’s going to propose,” Magnus muses.</p><p>“Oh? Must not be so subtle,” Alec snickers. That must be what the two were whispering about earlier.</p><p>Magnus snorts, and by the Angel, Alec loves the sound. So much.</p><p>“His secret is safe with me.” He leans back into Alec, and Alec relishes in the warmth of Magnus’ body against him.</p><p>“...she’s saying yes, right?” Alec is fairly certain he knows, but it doesn’t hurt.</p><p>“I’ve never seen her more sure about anything in her life,” Magnus replies without a shadow of a doubt. Alec nods, satisfied.</p><p>“I’m happy for him. And Clary.”</p><p>Magnus hums against his neck. “They’ll do well together,” he agrees.</p><p>They stand there for a little while longer, basking in each other’s company, trading chaste kisses until Magnus finally breaks away. He tugs at Alec’s arm as he pulls him back toward the warmth of the loft. Alec hesitates, not quite ready to end this perfect moment they’ve created for themselves, but Magnus tsks quietly with a soft shake of his head.</p><p>“We can’t leave our guests hostless forever, Alexander.” He says, arching an eyebrow.</p><p> </p><p>Almost as soon as they step inside, Simon shouts, “time?!”</p><p>“8:36!” Izzy chimes in, and the two are met with a chorus of groans and laughter and one extremely enthusiastic whoop by Max.</p><p>“...what?” Alec asks, brows furrowed in clear skepticism, knowing very well that he doesn’t even want to hear the answer.</p><p>“They were betting on how long you and Magnus would be out on the balcony,” Clary supplies, grinning. Her cheeks are flushed pink from the alcohol and she’s settled in on the sofa comfortably with an arm wrapped around Jace’s flank.</p><p>“Izzy thought you’d be out there for at least an hour making out,” Simon adds.</p><p>Alec glares at his sister in disbelief. “Iz!”</p><p>“I thought it was a reasonable guess,” she shrugs.</p><p>“I was only off by two minutes,” Max says, triumphant. Alec isn’t sure what he’s getting from this win, nor does he care.</p><p>“I thought you’d be a better host, Alec,” Maryse says with all the mock-disappointment she can muster, Luke patting her back in a consoling gesture. And while Alec is glad his mother is at a point where they can all joke together like this, it just feels a tad inappropriate (or maybe just downright mortifying).</p><p>Alec hates the blush that paints his face red. “I think that’s enough,” he sputters, as laughter spreads around him. He feels Magnus’ comforting hand on his shoulder, clearly telling him to just let it go. And if his dignity is the cost of seeing his family so full of joy, then maybe it’s a cost he’s happy to pay after all (though he’d never admit it).</p><p> </p><p>Their friends stay for a little while longer, trading stories of their lives in New York (including all the trouble Jace manages to get himself into), giving Clary fair warning, which she takes in stride (“I think I can handle him,” she declares confidently, and Alec has no doubt that she could). But as it gets closer to 10pm, Jace and Clary are the first to get up.</p><p>“We’ve got a little more packing to get done tonight,” he explains, and the rest of the guests follow suit. They say their goodbyes in the foyer, Maryse taking her time hugging her second son and whispering words of encouragement in his ear. Izzy and Max are lined up behind her, Izzy a little teary-eyed.</p><p>“You’ll just have to come visit me,” Jace says, as he pulls her into a hug.</p><p>“I’m being ridiculous. I’m helping you pack tomorrow, I’ll be seeing you again,” she huffs, wiping away a tear. Clary rubs soothing circles on her shoulder.</p><p>Alec watches them from where he stands next to Magnus, a few feet away, somewhat detached. It really does feel like the end of an era. He can feel Magnus’ gaze on him, questioning. Without saying a word, Alec just slips his palm against Magnus’ and squeezes.</p><p>After a few more hugs, tears, hair ruffles, and laughs, the guests depart, leaving Alec and Magnus alone in the loft. It seems oddly quiet after a night full of friends and family, but the silence is comfortable. The two work together in sync to finish the minimal clean up that’s left.</p><p>Magnus is the one who finally breaks the silence.</p><p>“Are you feeling okay, my love?” He asks, his rich voice as gentle as ever.</p><p>Alec nods, responding thoughtfully, “yeah, I’m alright. Just strange to think about Jace leaving… the condo’s going to feel empty without him.”</p><p>Magnus hums in response.</p><p>“Perhaps it would feel less empty… or lonely, if you moved out as well.”</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“Well,” Magnus continues, sounding unusually nervous. “Maybe the condo <em> is </em> too large for one person?” Magnus looks up at him from below his lashes, in a way that always makes Alec a little hot under the collar. He furrows his brows, thinking over Magnus’ words.</p><p>“I mean… I guess? I could try to find a smaller place, maybe,”</p><p>“Alexander I meant here,” Magnus blurts out, clearly exasperated by Alec’s lack of understanding. “I’m asking if you’d like to move in with me.”</p><p>Alec freezes, stunned at the proposition, “here?” is all he can manage to wheeze out, and Magnus nods. His fingers reach up to his ear cuff, something Alec now clearly recognizes as his nervous tick.</p><p>“It seems silly, you spend so much time here already, and there’s no real reason for you to keep that condo just for yourself,” he rambles. “But, but if you think it’s too early, or you, you’d just rather not, then,”</p><p>“Yes,” Alec interrupts, “yes, I’d love that, Magnus.”</p><p>“You would?” Magnus looks back at him, wide-eyed.</p><p>“Yes,” repeats Alec, and he’s treated with a wide, beaming smile.</p><p>“Wonderful,” Magnus mutters, still a little disbelieving.</p><p>The tone makes Alec tilt his head to the side. “Did you really think I’d say no?”</p><p>“No,” Magnus huffs out, but in a way that he clearly thought Alec might, and Alec can’t stifle the small laughter that escapes him.</p><p>“Magnus, if you’re telling me that you want me - here, every day, then I don’t want to spend another day anywhere else,” he can’t help the eagerness that seeps into his words, but it must hit the right note because his boyfriend looks back at him, looking vaguely awestruck by Alec’s words.</p><p>Alec lifts his hand and cups Magnus’ cheek; he can feel the heat under his palm. “How could you ever doubt that? From the moment I met you, you’ve changed my life for the better. You’ve motivated <em> me </em> to be better. For my clients, my friends, my family… for you. I owe it all to you.”</p><p>Magnus continues to watch him in an amazed silence, lips parted as if stuck in a gasp. Eventually, he manages to whisper in response, a soft tremble to his voice. “I think you don’t give yourself enough credit.”</p><p>Alec smiles, dropping his forehead against Magnus’. “I don’t know what I did to deserve you. Sometimes I still don’t think I do...”</p><p>“Well…” Magnus murmurs, breath warm on Alec’s skin. “I suppose you must learn to be content with being happier than you deserve, then,” he chuckles, watery, but happiness ringing clear. And Alec laughs in response, because Magnus really has no idea how true those words can be. How unbelievably happy Magnus makes him.</p><p>Alec stares at him, wondering just how much his eyes are sharing. He thinks the answer might just be “everything” when Magnus stares back with adoration clear in his gaze. With a smile on his face that he can’t suppress if he tries, Alec leans in, brushing his lips against Magnus’ in a tender kiss.</p><p>“Yeah, I suppose I do.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>...and that’s a wrap! Thank you for sticking through this fic with me and the idiot boys who finally learned to use their words (or at least they’re trying)!<br/>To everyone who left me kudos and comments, thank you so, SO much. It’s kind of mindblowing to hear that so many of you enjoyed this fic. They truly mean so much to me, they often made my day and kept me motivated to keep writing.<br/>I’ve personally loved writing this AU and may do some timestamps or other character perspective one-shots… if you have any ideas of things you’d like to see from this AU, please don’t hesitate to leave them in the comments ;)</p><p>My next fic idea is likely to be in a different fandom (SPN deancas anyone?), but I don’t think I can stay away from Malec for too long. In the meantime, if you feel so inclined, I have a few other Shadowhunters fics posted on ao3 that you can check out!</p><p>If you feel like connecting, you can find me on twitter @ tsujiharud or Instagram @ tsuji.haru.d<br/>I’m a bit more active on Twitter but I love interacting with others from the fandom on either!! :)</p><p>Again, thank you so so much for reading!!</p><p>Until next time -<br/>tsujiharu</p>
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